Question about potential AS "self diagnosis"

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I am new to these forums and came across them after quite a bit of reading into things about AS. I apologize if this is repetitive or not the correct place to post this as I am sure that these threads are quite common.

I guess I have a few questions about a potential “self diagnosis” and am just looking for general feedback. I say self diagnosis because I have had a hard time trying to find a therapist that is familiar with the subject. I have been in and out of therapy for depression and ADD symptoms and my current therapist is not familular with Asperger's and didnt think that it was a good fit based on his reading of the DMS-IV criteria because i dont exhibit the physical symptoms and that he felt that the other areas that i do fall under also fall under at least half a dozen other diagnoses that he felt. As for the ADD i have tried a few medications (adderall, ritalin, and wellbutrin) all without any improvement to symptoms.

On the one hand a lot of what I read sounds an awful lot like me, and based on that I would say it is likely that I would fall into the category of AS. However there is some doubt because “I hide it well”. A few things that make me question it is that is that I have a friend that works in a school system and they said that I don’t seem to have the “manifestations” of AS such as ticks, limb movement, and the sound of my voice. And I have to agree, after watching some youtube videos there does seem to be a fairly common “sound” to the voice of many of those who talk about their AS, and I do not have that sound, nor do I have any real physical ticks or manifestations.

On the other hand I have quite a few of the core attributes. I am above average in intelligence. I have very little interest or ability when it comes to small talk, I just don’t seem to know how to maintain a conversation unless it is about something that I know quite a bit on and tend to try to keep steering the conversation there. I don’t show emotion through my facial expressions and I have an overly practical view on emotional things. An example is reacting to news stories, for example 9/11, was there an initial shock over the event, yes, but shortly thereafter I was ready to move on and deal with it on a intellectual level rather than emotional. I also have a hard time with friends. I don’t seem to have “friends” but rather acquaintances. I don’t know why but I don’t seem to be able to move to from the one stage to the other unless the other person “chooses” me as a friend. Same goes with relationships, I have a hard time reading how the other person feels on a date and instead end up offering “outs” to see if the other person uses them as an opportunity to judge how things are going. And most of my relationships have ended with the other person at one point or another saying they didn’t feel I was opening up or connecting with them.

There are many more traits that I feel fall in line, but I’m not going to waste the space with listing them all out here. I have taken the AQ test and scored a 42 on it online as well as taken the AS test at rdos of which the results are linked below.

I have tried to keep things simple as not to overburden the post but will gladly expand on anything that i have touched upon if anyone had any questions.

actually i cant post the rdos graph as i cant post URLs due to anti-spam measures. So if anyone knows a way around this i have an imageshack link if that would be helpful.

Not all of us have outward "symptoms," like flapping limbs or voice distinction. When I went to my evaluation at a facility that treats both children and adults with Autism and Autism Spectrum Disorders, the secretary announced to the psychiatrist that his next scheduled appointment was in the waiting room and when the psychiatrist looked up at me, he asked, "Where is your child?"

Obviously, I do not look "disabled" or severely affected by Autism. Still, I have an official diagnosis of Asperger's Syndrome.
Unfortunately, now as an adult, I waited a long time to be "correctly" diagnosed after years of anquish as a child in the mental health system in the USA.

If a therapist has no practical experience dealing with Asperger's then he will depend entirely on the DSM criteria, and will look for the outward signs. If you don't have those outward signs because your Asperger's is very mild or involves mental and emotional problems rather than physical, then the therapist's diagnosis isn't going to be worth much.

Don't go by the Youtube videos because the people who look pretty NT are probably less likely to make such videos. I don't have any outward physical signs of Asperger's and sitting in a therapist's office isn't going to reveal my off and on problems with gross motor coordination. I tend to be clumsy, but not always. My speech and voice are also NT normal, as is true for many aspies.

For self-diagnosis, you have to go beyond the obvious social problems to what underlies them. And it also helps to be a self-aware person and fairly analytical. Reading as much as possible about other aspie's experiences and problems is probably a better guide than the DSM criteria. Just don't rush into it. It's a syndrome, and unless you have some signs of all of the diagnostic criteria, then other diagnoses might be more appropriate.

Welcome to WP!