Initiating physical affection

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I've been seeing my boyfriend for 10 months now. We're having alot of problems, but I love him. Three months into the relationship he told me he has Aspergers Syndrome - I guess he couldnt explain the way he'd been acting anymore. A friend of his recently told me that he didnt believe my boyfriend has Aspergers. I've read alot about AS and initiating affection, and apparently this is very rare. He's the most affectionate boyfriend I've ever had, always has his arm round me, initiates pretty much everything - is this normal for someone with AS?

There are as many different kinds of "affection types" within people with Asperger's as there is out in the "typical" population. I have two sons on the spectrum, and BOTH of them are really quite affectionate.

He sounds nice! Enjoy the affection!

If a person with Asperger's can show affection, it tends to be an unusually large amount of affection. I can be that way. Right now I'm interested in a girl and like to give her a hug each time i see her. People with Asperger's have trouble knowing how much affection is normal to give.

It's not unheard of. I am one of those who initiates.

I never know how much affection is appropriate unless someone sets some precedents first. For example, a girl I know at uni hugs everyone, and is very affectionate towards her friends. So with her, I don't hesitate to be affectionate, but with others I don't know what is appropriate.

I rarely initiate affection and generally just quietly accept any hugs people want to give me as I don't really know what's appropriate and don't want to make any fuss over anything. I am friends with other aspies though who started giving me hugs the second time we met, so yeh it definately differs between people.

Thanks for the replies

some are more closed off than others.

your BF is a little like me then possibly. i initiate things, not with a s**t ton of people though. and oddly it's like a practiced art form to me. i've gotten comments before from different girls that quite frankly i'm one of the sweetest people they know, beautiful personality, etc. idk, just when i see someone i like, i just go into an "aim to please, courteous, & witty" mode. i can be very affectionate at such times. it makes me happy to make them happy. making the people i like happy also gives me feelings of self-validation i suppose. at least one thing i can seem to do right when i can manage it.

the whole situation is somewhat amusing to me. because i'm not sure why i am the way i am.
being single as i currently am, i suppose i might be doing it because perhaps at heart, i'm an attention-whore. no better way to get it than to give it.

If someone leans in to give me a hug I usually kinda give them one back, but usually halfhearted cos I don't want to but easier to than to get the slack for rejecting. Same with handshakes. WHY does everyone need to shake my hand!?
I rarely initiaite unless its with friends, family or I am feeling the need to show someone how much I appreciate them, usually, but not always, during hyperness.
When I had a crush I neer initiated anything with him, it was always up to him cos I felt bad for liking him and was too scared of rejection.

Could be his touch sensory too, you're one of the few people who's natural hug feels comfortable to him, and thus can "cuddle" with comfortably. Just be sure to teach him your limits and make sure he understands the when and where for it. Bear in mind, im looking at this quantitatively given my lack of social experience in the matter. Other than that, i wish both of you well.

Thanks for the replies

Could be his touch sensory too, you're one of the few people who's natural hug feels comfortable to him, and thus can "cuddle" with comfortably. Just be sure to teach him your limits and make sure he understands the when and where for it. Bear in mind, im looking at this quantitatively given my lack of social experience in the matter. Other than that, i wish both of you well.

Every Aspie is unique, we all affected in different ways and at different levels by each trait. Saying someone does not have AS because of one behaviour shows complete ignorance of how Asperger's works.