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Zeek
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07 Nov 2009, 1:39 am

With my friendships I have 2 problems. Not saying how I really feel and not letting people see the real me

With number one I tend to just laugh even if I don't get the joke yet, not saying if I'm disgusted or anything I just act like the stereotype I've made for myself which leads me to number two

Number two is like I'll show one person my happy joking side, another my sadistic evil side etc but I never show anyone the full me the full picture. I'm trying to do that here but I'm just not good at it. I'm just not sure if these are actually problems or good things and if bad, how do I overcome them?



Fredozindo
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07 Nov 2009, 3:19 am

OK...

as you would know... you are all different than average people...

it is very common for someone who is "different" bu trying to fit in... to do these things.... now...

i know that you don't have many things that are actually common with people...

but... just try to lighten things up.... you might actually need to observe the things around you... and this can helps you be yourself... somehow but the opportunity will come... just keep praying... just be easy minded... flexible thinking... aren't you guys like....smart... :wink:



Aqua_Dragon
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07 Nov 2009, 6:06 am

@fredozindo
People with Aspergers have only a slightly higher range of intelligence then regular people. Not everyone who has Asperger's is super intelligent, and it is fully possible for an Aspie to be about as smart as any other normal dude.

Now with that aside, I don't think either of these are a problem as long as you are fine with them. Allow me to delve into those a bit more specifically.

1. That is actually fine, and I am fairly certain even NT's tend to do that. In addition, perhaps it isn't always the best idea to allow other people to know that what they said made you feel negative emotions, as it could end up making them feel guilty and overall doesn't really accomplish anything.

2. This is also completely normal among NT's. You will act differently with different people depending on both their personality and how well you get along with them. As an example: I tend to do rather silly things when I'm around two of my Greater Acquaintances, but am a bit more conservative with my best friend. And yet, with a regular acquaintance of mine, I won't play around but we will sometimes engage in philosophical debates, such as the actual usefulness of a democracy.



omfgz
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07 Nov 2009, 2:10 pm

Fredozindo wrote:
OK...

as you would know... you are all different than average people...

it is very common for someone who is "different" bu trying to fit in... to do these things.... now...

i know that you don't have many things that are actually common with people...

but... just try to lighten things up.... you might actually need to observe the things around you... and this can helps you be yourself... somehow but the opportunity will come... just keep praying... just be easy minded... flexible thinking... aren't you guys like....smart... :wink:


I'm guessing you don't and never had aspergers



Zeek
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07 Nov 2009, 2:59 pm

Thanks Aqua. Also for the record I don't make people know they made me feel negative emotions (they normally don't anyway) but everytime I have a negative emotion I lock it away rather than let anyone know. Sometimes causes a build up but still. Ahh I see all people show different sides to different people. I just think it would be healthy to show my full self to someone. Also with your philosophical debates I quite often have really deep conversations with people if its just the two of us. I'm really good at them. People also turn to me for relationship advice (quite funny seeing as though I've never had a girlfriend). Well only 1 of my mates has a gf but if he hadn't turned to me it might be none so yeah. Just wanted to point out I know how loving relationships work I just wouldn't enjoy being in one (I've gone slightly off topic but I just wanted to point out I know how to work some relationships just not friend ones)