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leejosepho
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16 Nov 2009, 10:17 pm

chelischili7 wrote:
As an Aspie, I am generally happy but I there is one major piece missing - a companion. I am saddened sometimes because I see other people walking around with their wife, g/f, b/f, or fiance. I have always wanted that but have not found that person yet. Am I happy? Yes, but I will never be completely happy until I find someone that I truly connect with. I have yet to find that person.


Hang in there, take a look up from your work when others are around and try to offer a bit of a smile once in a while and be patient and do not compromise yourself for anyone or anything. Just as you are longing and wondering, so is someone else you might already know or simply have yet to meet!


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16 Nov 2009, 10:52 pm

I had a friend, he worked at a university, in the print shop. One girl came to pick up for her department, hung around a bit long, and he talked printing to her. After a half dozen tries she kicked him in the shin. He married her. We can be a bit dense.

Many women would marry any man who did not watch sports on TV.

WP is for complaining, for no one else would ever listen, and understand.

NT claims to be happy, yet is overwhelmed by just working, wearing clothes, living somewhere, and will go in debt forever for trinkets.

AS wonders weather they are happy, and is overwhelmed because they are not doing enough.

NT judged by their dreams are faking it.

AS judged by their dreams have not done nearly enough.

It is better to have obsessed and lost, than to have never lived with passion.



SamBell
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17 Nov 2009, 11:47 am

i would think it is very possible one of the reasons i think is because our main disadvantage can also be one of our strongest points in that we dont get caught up in all those mind games and social nonsense (aspies arent really part of society like nt's are, hard to get in but also hard to get out of). i think its easier to figure out what you really want if youre alone so you wont be influenced by others.

when im by myself im pretty happy the only time im not happy is when i get stressed in social situations and that rarely happens.

i think many people have a mask that gives the illusion of them being happy.



Azharia
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17 Nov 2009, 1:56 pm

I am pretty happy with life. In loving relationship, with baby to look after, and life is good.
Yes I get stressed and sometimes depressed. (More stressed really)
But doesn't everyone?
In general I think I am pretty well off. :)



Amajanshi
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17 Nov 2009, 11:59 pm

I think we're both happier and sadder than NTs in a sense.

For example, we're less likely to be accepted in general by them, but then again, we don't have to face the social drama that they experience coz we're not even up there.

So it's like we have reduced social standards and expectations, 1 or 2 close friends is usually enough for us.



madbutnotmad
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17 Dec 2016, 5:13 pm

One Autism theory is called Intense world theory which does in deed confirm what you have written in that they propose that people on the spectrum experience all emotions in a much more intense way than most people.
I personally agree with their theory.

As to whether we are more happy.
I would say that if the same type of asperger's got together and formed a community,
then they may be able to create an equilibrium within their sub-society that allows people to achieve high levels of peace and happiness.

As the same type of aspo's would follow the same rules, and believe the same ethos. and be honest and loyal.
As well as have a good understanding of each other and why people within the group act the way they do.



AbuB
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17 Dec 2016, 6:42 pm

I like the idea of Intense world theory... I feel individuals on the spectrum have potential to experience higher state of emotions than "NTs" but that is a double edged sword... People on the spectrum will also be capable of experiencing magnificently negative emotional states. If you were to create values for happiness and plot them on a graph, IMO the spectrum happiness graph would be similar to a seismograph reading... all over the place . If you were to create a graph for "NTs" they would probably look more similar to that of a standard heart beat. Ups & downs with smooth periods inbetween. If I were to venture a guess on the mean of valued happiness between spectrum vs "NT"s over long periods of time, I wouldnt be surprised if they balanced out to be pretty similar. At the end of the day, "NT"s can argue that they experience more happiness because they can more easily express their emotions while the ones on the spectrum can argue that they experience even greater emotions but just cant tell you about it. All in all I think it depends more on the specific individual regardless of what they are labeled.