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newchum
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21 Feb 2006, 9:42 pm

My social skills are getting better but from a low base. I sometimes have a mild stammer in conversations with other people, I only have a basic understanding of body language, I am still getting around to managing proper eye contact and my small talk is not good.

I have a feeling if I were re-assessed for the disability pension, I still would be deemed unfit to work any hours in open employment, due to my underdeveloped social skills.



parts
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21 Feb 2006, 10:04 pm

Mine have gotten better over time I still have very bad problems with body language and tone of voice. I've tried to memorize all the different tones and facial expressions people make or relate the way they act to known reactions I've gotten in the past but its still very stressful for me. My eyes tend to look at their mouths or dart about the room.



TheBladeRoden
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21 Feb 2006, 10:11 pm

______________flatlining___________


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Aspie_Chav
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22 Feb 2006, 2:40 am

Yesterday I was watching a TV program about some people who was being interviewed for a job as a wedding coordinator. They had 60 seconds. Except for one, they made no perpetration and made a complete pigs ear of it completely.

NT are probably not as gifted in the art of communication I once thought and they can be very complacent. I am studying the science of body language and going on a flirting seminar in London.

Best of all, I am not going to no listen to NT about just waiting and being yourself and it will some how magically happy.



Murdal
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22 Feb 2006, 7:02 pm

My social skills have advanced tremendously through therapy (from K-6th grades) and through my own personal observations (K-Present). I still have a problem understanding sarcasm. Unless the person is dear and well known to me, I will not understand it.

I also suggest if you are around my age to try and get a job in retail. I work in, of all things, a Jewelry store on the side of my real profession and training in Music Education and Therapy.

Experience will always be key.



SpaceCase
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22 Feb 2006, 7:16 pm

My social skills weren't all that great when I was younger but they have gotten ALOT better as I got older.


-SpaceCase :D


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edgey123
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22 Feb 2006, 7:38 pm

My social skills aren't great.

I purposely isolate myself from others as I find NT's in particular too challenging



mikibacsi1124
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22 Feb 2006, 8:24 pm

I would say my social skills are very good - for an aspie. Which means they're still not nearly good enough.



ramsamsam
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23 Feb 2006, 3:42 am

Quote:
My social skills aren't great.

I purposely isolate myself from others as I find NT's in particular too challenging


How do you they are NT's? There are alot of people with Dysphraxia, Bi-Polar, Epilepsy, Dyslexia, ADHD and even autism who you wouldn't really know that they were unless they said so.

My social skills can be bad, but mostly when I I'm tired because i forget everything. Often I take jokes too far and offend people with out realising it, and I think the tone of my voice mostly doesn't convey my actual feelings that well, eye contact is poor and I flinch alot. However mostly I can still make friends albeit with being known often as beligerent, self absorbed, arrogant, rude or insensitive.



mikibacsi1124
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23 Feb 2006, 12:50 pm

ramsamsam wrote:
How do you they are NT's? There are alot of people with Dysphraxia, Bi-Polar, Epilepsy, Dyslexia, ADHD and even autism who you wouldn't really know that they were unless they said so.


I guess this is where the whole "NT vs. NA" debate comes in. I usually can't relate any more to a typical person with ADHD or bipolar than I can to a typical NT (and yes I know that's redundant).



PrisonerSix
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23 Feb 2006, 1:54 pm

Mine are so-so. They have improved, but probably could use more work. I find social skills alot of work, since it doesn't come naturally to me. I often find myself tiring when I have to be in social situations because it's work to me.

I keep chugging on though.


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Laz
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23 Feb 2006, 2:04 pm

There was a dramatic improvement in my social skills from when diagnosed and recieving speach therapy. Several Years later i was a totally differnt person in regards to socialising and pretty much fitted into college no problems.

I do tend to stick out quite noticeably from other aspies but then no two asp's are alike but it is something alot of people who work in the field and other asps note themselves. No on here of course, on her ei think ive insulted more people then ticket inspectors on the london underground



deep-techno
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23 Feb 2006, 3:36 pm

My socials skills has vastly improved since I was young.


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24 Feb 2006, 11:39 pm

My social skils suck but the're better than ever before.


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TheBladeRoden
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25 Feb 2006, 3:24 am

I've lost some social skills over the past few years


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pyraxis
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25 Feb 2006, 10:28 am

Mine are fine online but in-person could use some work.

I can do smalltalk, but not for long, and it's draining... I usually find a bathroom afterwards and go hide out for 15 minutes or so until I've recovered.
My eye contact sucks: I can get by okay in an impartial/rational conversation by looking at people's mouths, but the moment emotion gets involved, I can't speak and look a person in the face at the same time.
My body language is passable but consciously controlled and tends to make people uncomfortable. Those who don't know me that well think I don't like them or I'm bored. Those who do know me say it looks like I'm frightened all the time (which is somewhat accurate). I've learned the basics of confident posture and I pose myself using it, but it doesn't have that feel of authenticity.