The worst day of my life

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2day my 10yr as son not only got him self & his 6yr sister lost but also waved down a car & got the couple 2 bring them home (thank god the couple were decent people), myself , my husband, parents and half the people in our neighbour hood spent 2-3 hrs searching 4 both of them, i was in the middle of phoning the police when J & his sister turn up in a stranger's car, no shoe's & socks, J telling the couple they had been abducted & dumped in a pond, i phoned our emergency's police department, they came round & J admitted he had wondered off, got lost & waved down a car which thank god brought them home safetly.

j thought he would be in trouble, so ran off, his younger sister wanted 2 come home but J did'nt want 2 so he made his sister follow him.

I think the night mare of 2day will live with me 4ever, i was lucky i got my kid's bck, not many people get thier kids bck. I dont' want 2 go 2 bed incase of the night mares.

As far as J is concerned, he is permantly grounded, he cannot be trusted out side .We have tried everything with j, at the end of the day, j still insist he do'nst care about us,what do we do?

fox1028

You must have been terrified that something had happened to them. Thank goodness they had the sense to flag down a car and that the people were good people and brought them home.

I think you need to figure out why J thought he would be in trouble in the first place and ran off. Maybe you can find out when you stop crying.

Please don't actually ground him and his sister for the rest of their lives, because they need chances to learn to make good decisions instead of bad ones. I understand perfectly grounding them both until they demonstrate more responsibility and earn your trust, however. There is a device you could attach to J's wrist that he cannot remove that has a GPS tracking device in it. They use them for Alzheimer's patients and some children with autism. Maybe it would help.

I will make a confession here. Once I ran away from home and persuaded my younger brother to come with me because my mother would not let me wear a party dress to school because it would have been inappropriate. So I put on the party dress and told my brother I was running away and he wanted to come too. We didn't get very far, because we were obedient children who had been forbidden to cross the street. We stopped to play with our friends who lived nearby and their mother apparently called our mother, so she was not worried. Kids do not always consider the effects of their actions on others. That is just being immature, it is not being bad. You will teach them and they will eventually get it as they grow older.

Maybe they ran away because they were scared of punishment. Kids who are punished too frequently or too severely tend to resort to these tactics. From their point of view, the longer they stay away from home, the longer they can delay the punishment; they're hoping to buy time so they can think of something (whatever it may be).

I don't have any answers for you, but you sound like you need a hug big time . Consider yourself hugged. Hope things are going better for you now. Pink

I know exactly how you feel. We were in our town one day. It was at the weekend and really busy. Our 9yr old aspie wanted to go somewhere and we said in a minute, but he wanted to go immediately and had a meltdown and decided to run off. My husband went running after him, but couldn't see him anywhere. I was feeling sick and trying to stay calm for my younger son. We eventually saw some police and as we were talking to them a woman came up to us and said she'd just seen a boy in BHS crying, so I ran there really quickly and he was there. It really frightened him and if we went somewhere and he couldn't see us, he would cry out. Maybe it's frightened him and he won't do it again

J originally got him self covered in paint (he had found out side) and was caught my a local police man painting a door with it, the police man told J 2 come home & get cleaned up. J deciced ro run off with his younger sister (in which case they got lost), J's sister was scarred and told J she wanted 2 come home but J refused.
The road they were picked up on was a national speed limit road (70mph), it's a very narrow & fast road.

I have a thing at home, where if one the kids does some thing wrong, rarther than lie about who's done it, tel me the truth & i 'll forget about it no more questions, if they lie all privilage's get stopped till the truth comes out ( 4 all kids).
Rarther than punish i try and work with the kids & get them to talk about why they misbehaved & try & sort things out ( this works well with J), shouting, smacking e.t.c only makes things worse with J. j is a very moody sulky boy if things don't go his way.

J has only started 2 be a loud out on the front street 4 the past 18 months ( we can't wrap him in cotton wool 4 ever), i aggree J has got to make right & wrong decisions on his own, just not with his younger sister.
j will be supervised at all time's when he is outside from now on, i won't take the chance of yesterday happening all over again, i may not be lucky enough 2 get them back next time.
J's younger sister has lot's of friends on our street which she can be trusted 2 play out with.

J has been great recently it was his birthday & we took him 2 a haunted castle , which i took torch's & a pic nic & glow in the dark necklace's, we explored the castle in the dark ( the castle & grounds r a lit up with speacial under the tree lights and spooky music), J did'nt have a clue & was totallly gob smacked when we pulled up, i had made him a speacial cake which had out side, the following day it had snowed badly, i we had a snow ball fight and went sledging, a magical wkend was had by all.

J still has his clubs & this is a big set back regarding trust with J but we will start again & work through things.

lost children is always a stressful event~sorry you had to go through this...glad they're home safe.