Scored 34 on AQ test, now what?

Post Reply New Topic

I took the AQ test two weeks ago and got a 34. I have an appointment with a psychologist but I don’t know what to do about it until then. I have always been “different” from my peers and never been able to maintain relationships, I'm 26 and never had a girlfriend or best friend, and I don't really want either. But to think that I might have a diagnosable condition is really hitting me hard. The more research I do on Asperger's and PDD, the more it all makes since. My parents have noticed that something is not right with my social skills, how do I tell them I might have Asperger's or PDD? I could really use some advice on how to tell my parents that this might the reason why I’m so strange.

they already know something's up, Patrick420, so it is really not going to be a real surprise to them. They might be astonished at what the DX is, though, as few people really know autism when they see it.

But just remember you are really no different today than you were yesterday, and it really isn't like you just woke up today and now have sky blue skin or something and everyone will notice something different about you. Of course, your mind is reeling with the information, and it will take you a few years of heavy WP use to process though it. But it is free, and you will eventually make your peace with the DX.

Congratulations, though. Welcome home!

Merle

Welcome to Wrongplanet Since you are seeking an official diagnosis, I only hope that you do not live in the United States, or if you do, in a state that may provide some services. With an autism diagnosis, decent health insurance is next to impossible to find.

1. You may have ASD. Get a proper diagnosis if you want to know. I do not have one yet, but i'm working on it... again. For me, it is "I already know, but i need it on paper to get more what i need"-legal thing. if you are satisfied by "just knowing" you do not need to get a diagnosis.

2. "the more it makes sense"... it was the same for me. I knew i wasnt normal and i knew i wasnt Autistic - i felt somewhere inbetween and when i read about AS, i was like you - i made a big "Ahaaaaaaaaaa, so thats what it is!".

One note, a diagnosis isnt going to change who you are. Its not like some magic red/blue pill you take and BAM!! - you have a wife, a job and a new house.

Depends on your family. If they are abusive or condescending or not.
I wouldnt tell them at first. You can always tell them but you cant untell them.
Besides theres nothing much they can do to help.

Understanding yourself and how others react to you is something only you can do.
So keep it your secret.

At least wait until after you've consulted with the Psychiatrist before you say anything to your family. If his opinion backs you up, then at least you have the endorsement of a Mental Health professional on your side in case anyone gets all skeptical on you and tries to claim there's nothing wrong with you except a general weirdness.

You just never know how people will react. My folks seemed a little surprised when I first brought it up, but accepted it pretty quickly when they realized, just as I had, how well it explained so many of the difficulties I'd had all my life that they were never able to 'parent' out of me. Finally, they had something tangible that took the guilt off them for not raising me well enough to 'make me normal'. I could take that as a little insulting, but at least they haven't argued with me and tried to tell me I'm just making excuses.

Of course I was 49 when that happened, and everyone in my family had long given up on any ideas that I might change or outgrow my odd behavior.


Those disconcerted feelings about having a diagnosable condition may linger for a while, that's normal. Usually, when you've suspected for a while on your own, the actual diagnosis can come as a tremendous sense of relief, at finally knowing the truth and having some concrete understanding (and verifiable proof) at last of why life has been so awkward and difficult. And it's possible and even normal to have both sets of feelings concurrently for quite some time.

In a way it's like waking up a different person and having to take some time to get acquainted with who you really are, who you really have been without realizing it for years and years. It's liberating, it's cathartic and a little bit tragic and scary...and then you start to get used to the idea...as the old you and the new you begin to re-fuse.

Refuse?

Remerge?

Reassemble?

Oh, hell, you get the idea...

For me my parents have aways know something other then just the ADD and Dysleixa. And I have been go over so much of my past and half fits with someone who has Dyslexia the other half is not reading like someone who has ADD. But for me it's like I'm starting to wake up for the first time and years and starting to understand myself a lot better then ever before. If I can get tested and Asperger was a big part of it then I don't know it will just feel like a wieght has been lefted from me.

Even if it's not just the fact that I'm really looking back more at my past and who I was is really helping me think more about just who I am and where I'm going in life. And I have to say a lot of older people in there late 20's and into there 30's on up just don't have that kind of money to get there tests. They also may not have parents to help them with this either or for the most part family. Some may not even believe they have anything wrong.

Thanks for the advice so far guys. I'm just worried that my mother will feel guilty for not catching it sooner. My research seems to say that unless I had some of the behavior problems related to Asperger's, I was probably not going to be diagnosed as a child of the 90's. And I am able to be social when I have to, but it has always been such hard work just to be able to pretend to socialize with people. But know that I may have identified why I am the way I am, I am starting to feel better about myself. I'm just worried my parents will see it as a disability instead of an answer.

Just remember until 1994 most people never even heard of Aspergers. Even know it's still something not ever one knows about. So it's not shocking that a lot of people may have had but they were said to have had, ADHD, ADD, OCD, and so on instead.

Though someone can have Asperger's and ADD. Or Asperger's and OCD. Or Aspergers and a learning disability and sense they were only checking for what they knew about at the time yeah it would be missed.

If I can put that fear to rest my mom who is helping me go over all of this has said that she does not look at it as a disability more like any answer to life long questions she and my dad have had. It is also answers for life long questions I have had to. Some I have stopped careing about.

Best thing is to say something you may end up getting some help on you're quest to find the answers.