True love really may not be for everyone(Nice guys vs mean )

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what u girl really prefer
nice guys 50%  50%  [ 9 ]
nice guys 50%  50%  [ 9 ]
not really nice guys 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
not really nice guys 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Total votes : 18

LePetitPrince
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02 Apr 2006, 7:30 am

Serissa wrote:
so guyz r still askin Y we like guyz who r meen. So, y do we?

I liek guyz who r meen a lot more than nice guyz tho i am dating someone wicked nice (unfortoonately) but im not smart enuff to no y


This post reminds me of this article :


True love really may not be for everyone

Sterling Hunter
Staff Reporter

Have you ever felt like you're doing time and never committed a crime? This is how I feel when it comes to love; I've been sentenced to L.I.F.E. It's not really the life you think of where I have to sit in a little cell dressed in stripes and pee into a hole in the floor, but it comes pretty close. L.I.F.E. stands for Love Isn't For Everyone and that's what I'm living.

Now ya’ll are probably sitting there reading this and thinking, "This Sterling guy is a punk," but hear me out on this one.

I could tell that I would have a different life than most when it came to relationships and love. I've always had trouble with the ladies from the start. You name it- I've had it done to me. Everything from being led on to being given the wrong phone number to being told that she has a boyfriend when she's really been single for years-I've been through it all.

I can recall back in the 7th grade, my friend and I would play the number game (see how many phone number you could get from the females around school).

The catch to the game was that the numbers had to match the female that gave it to you (though I wish it was the other way around because I would've won every time). I always lost the game with my friend and lost the game with the females as well. There are basically two types of guys: nice and not so nice.

It seems to me that most females tend to like the same type of guy, which is the not so nice one. Now don't get mad at me for saying that because I know there are females somewhere in this universe that would like nothing more than to have a nice guy around them; my radar just isn't strong enough to detect them yet.

It's really sad because in the race of L.I.F.E., most nice guys tend to finish last. It's almost more painful to watch a nice guy get ditched for a not so nice guy than it is to see who J.Lo and Brittany Spears are going to break up with next.

Speaking of superstars, I really can't stand a lot of love movies either because they always depict the nice guy getting the girl, which is fiction. How many of you females would really date that goofy Biggs dude from American Pie or date Lieutenant Dan from Forest Gump?

Being nice to a female is almost like Kryptonite to Superman- they almost can't stand it! I don't know how many times I've been told that I'm too nice and it makes me mad because it doesn't make sense. If Bill Gates can't be too rich, how can I be too nice?

If you do happen to see a nice guy with a girl, things aren't always what they seem at first sight as I've slowly come to learn.

Being taken advantage of is a nice guy’s nickname and a lot of females know this. I've fallen into this category many times and I know some guys know what I'm talking about. It's very frustrating because just when you think you've figured them out and you can pick the good ones from the bad ones, you get tricked.

Some females comes along thinking she's Halle Berry and tries to win an Academy Award on the behalf of your feelings.

It's very cruel to trick people but I think a lot of it has to do with a person’s past.

If a person has been hurt time and time again, eventually they're going to do what's being done to them to someone else.

Animal Planet is a very educational show because it teaches you not only about animals but also about yourself.

We sometimes think that animals are not as smart as humans and that we can't learn anything from them but I think there is much to learn from them. The king of the jungle, the lion, is so similar to the not so nice male of the human race that it's scary! The lioness stays up all day long, taking care of the cubs, hunting for the food, and never getting any rest. What does the male do you ask? He sleeps all day long and when the food is caught, almost beats up the lioness to eat first.

Over time the word love has changed meaning. It was once a feeling you had towards a person that you couldn't do without.

Now, it's what you make and who you make it with. Though "playas" and "pimps" have been around for a long time, I think that love was a lot stronger in our parents and grandparents' generation than it is in ours today.

People don't know what a monogamous relationship is and really don't care. They don't know what commitment is and aren't interested in finding out.

Everyone just wants to be a "playa" and be with as many people as they can. I sometimes feel out of place because my beliefs are from the "old school" though I was born into this new generation.

I'm happy to say that the race is not over for us nice guys. Slowly, females are beginning to open their eyes and see that a nice guy is really what they've always wanted. One day the not so nice guys will open their eyes too and see that they're losing the race to the nice guys and come on over to our team and all ladies will be treated with the respect and love that they are so deserving of.

Until this day shows itself, we nice guys are stuck on the bench while the not so nice guys go out and lose the game for us all. Whether nice or mean, male or female, I want everyone to remember this: Live your life by your heart and not always by your mind because no one wants to be sentenced to L.I.F.E.

So girls c'mon vote



Serissa
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02 Apr 2006, 8:31 am

I has assumed it was extremely obvious that I was being extremely sarcastic on the thread due not only to the content alone but the purposeful atrocious slaughtering of the English language (I type badly but I'm not THAT bad).



TheGreyBadger
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02 Apr 2006, 8:33 am

I've been trying to figure out why not so nice guys have been exciting to women since Day One. I think it's because their guts feel "If I have a child with him, my son will be a Slytherin and have the edge over all the other guys." And nobody wants a wimp. But a strong quiet nice guy? You bet! Except for the sort who define "nice" so narrowly they're going to impose their definitions on you because it's rooted in a set of rules they have memorized. For instance, that you're not supposed to argue with them. (true experience). But thinking nice guys? Where are they all?

Of course, define "girls" and "females". If you're chasing the cheerleaders and ignoring the labmate you think of as a sister, or worse yet, a "dog", I'm not shedding any tears. Be warned!



jman
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02 Apr 2006, 8:57 am

LePetitPrince wrote:
Serissa wrote:
so guyz r still askin Y we like guyz who r meen. So, y do we?

I liek guyz who r meen a lot more than nice guyz tho i am dating someone wicked nice (unfortoonately) but im not smart enuff to no y


This post reminds me of this article :


True love really may not be for everyone

Sterling Hunter
Staff Reporter

Have you ever felt like you're doing time and never committed a crime? This is how I feel when it comes to love; I've been sentenced to L.I.F.E. It's not really the life you think of where I have to sit in a little cell dressed in stripes and pee into a hole in the floor, but it comes pretty close. L.I.F.E. stands for Love Isn't For Everyone and that's what I'm living.

Now ya’ll are probably sitting there reading this and thinking, "This Sterling guy is a punk," but hear me out on this one.

I could tell that I would have a different life than most when it came to relationships and love. I've always had trouble with the ladies from the start. You name it- I've had it done to me. Everything from being led on to being given the wrong phone number to being told that she has a boyfriend when she's really been single for years-I've been through it all.

I can recall back in the 7th grade, my friend and I would play the number game (see how many phone number you could get from the females around school).

The catch to the game was that the numbers had to match the female that gave it to you (though I wish it was the other way around because I would've won every time). I always lost the game with my friend and lost the game with the females as well. There are basically two types of guys: nice and not so nice.

It seems to me that most females tend to like the same type of guy, which is the not so nice one. Now don't get mad at me for saying that because I know there are females somewhere in this universe that would like nothing more than to have a nice guy around them; my radar just isn't strong enough to detect them yet.

It's really sad because in the race of L.I.F.E., most nice guys tend to finish last. It's almost more painful to watch a nice guy get ditched for a not so nice guy than it is to see who J.Lo and Brittany Spears are going to break up with next.

Speaking of superstars, I really can't stand a lot of love movies either because they always depict the nice guy getting the girl, which is fiction. How many of you females would really date that goofy Biggs dude from American Pie or date Lieutenant Dan from Forest Gump?

Being nice to a female is almost like Kryptonite to Superman- they almost can't stand it! I don't know how many times I've been told that I'm too nice and it makes me mad because it doesn't make sense. If Bill Gates can't be too rich, how can I be too nice?

If you do happen to see a nice guy with a girl, things aren't always what they seem at first sight as I've slowly come to learn.

Being taken advantage of is a nice guy’s nickname and a lot of females know this. I've fallen into this category many times and I know some guys know what I'm talking about. It's very frustrating because just when you think you've figured them out and you can pick the good ones from the bad ones, you get tricked.

Some females comes along thinking she's Halle Berry and tries to win an Academy Award on the behalf of your feelings.

It's very cruel to trick people but I think a lot of it has to do with a person’s past.

If a person has been hurt time and time again, eventually they're going to do what's being done to them to someone else.

Animal Planet is a very educational show because it teaches you not only about animals but also about yourself.

We sometimes think that animals are not as smart as humans and that we can't learn anything from them but I think there is much to learn from them. The king of the jungle, the lion, is so similar to the not so nice male of the human race that it's scary! The lioness stays up all day long, taking care of the cubs, hunting for the food, and never getting any rest. What does the male do you ask? He sleeps all day long and when the food is caught, almost beats up the lioness to eat first.

Over time the word love has changed meaning. It was once a feeling you had towards a person that you couldn't do without.

Now, it's what you make and who you make it with. Though "playas" and "pimps" have been around for a long time, I think that love was a lot stronger in our parents and grandparents' generation than it is in ours today.

People don't know what a monogamous relationship is and really don't care. They don't know what commitment is and aren't interested in finding out.

Everyone just wants to be a "playa" and be with as many people as they can. I sometimes feel out of place because my beliefs are from the "old school" though I was born into this new generation.

I'm happy to say that the race is not over for us nice guys. Slowly, females are beginning to open their eyes and see that a nice guy is really what they've always wanted. One day the not so nice guys will open their eyes too and see that they're losing the race to the nice guys and come on over to our team and all ladies will be treated with the respect and love that they are so deserving of.

Until this day shows itself, we nice guys are stuck on the bench while the not so nice guys go out and lose the game for us all. Whether nice or mean, male or female, I want everyone to remember this: Live your life by your heart and not always by your mind because no one wants to be sentenced to L.I.F.E.

So girls c'mon vote


Ok a few points:

1. The person who wrote this is probably young like maybe 19 and very inexperienced when it comes to women.
2.this person is probably chasing the wrong women
3. the person probably takes women too personally, and doesn;t have nonchalant attitude about it.



moomin
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02 Apr 2006, 9:02 am

TheGreyBadger wrote:
I've been trying to figure out why not so nice guys have been exciting to women since Day One. I think it's because their guts feel "If I have a child with him, my son will be a Slytherin and have the edge over all the other guys." And nobody wants a wimp. But a strong quiet nice guy? You bet! Except for the sort who define "nice" so narrowly they're going to impose their definitions on you because it's rooted in a set of rules they have memorized. For instance, that you're not supposed to argue with them. (true experience). But thinking nice guys? Where are they all?

Of course, define "girls" and "females". If you're chasing the cheerleaders and ignoring the labmate you think of as a sister, or worse yet, a "dog", I'm not shedding any tears. Be warned!


nice reply!
i was also going to say, nice guys are good- i go for nice guys- but you've got to be manly aswell. I don't mean caveman like, but you need to show that you are a man-otherwise women end up seeing you as a girl. In fact, if anyone has seen Green Wing there's a brilliant sketch where Martin who is too nice fancys Caroline but she says 'Oh i see you as a girlfriend'.



jman
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02 Apr 2006, 9:25 am

moomin wrote:
TheGreyBadger wrote:
I've been trying to figure out why not so nice guys have been exciting to women since Day One. I think it's because their guts feel "If I have a child with him, my son will be a Slytherin and have the edge over all the other guys." And nobody wants a wimp. But a strong quiet nice guy? You bet! Except for the sort who define "nice" so narrowly they're going to impose their definitions on you because it's rooted in a set of rules they have memorized. For instance, that you're not supposed to argue with them. (true experience). But thinking nice guys? Where are they all?

Of course, define "girls" and "females". If you're chasing the cheerleaders and ignoring the labmate you think of as a sister, or worse yet, a "dog", I'm not shedding any tears. Be warned!


nice reply!
i was also going to say, nice guys are good- i go for nice guys- but you've got to be manly aswell. I don't mean caveman like, but you need to show that you are a man-otherwise women end up seeing you as a girl. In fact, if anyone has seen Green Wing there's a brilliant sketch where Martin who is too nice fancys Caroline but she says 'Oh i see you as a girlfriend'.


exaclt moonim most women want to date REAL men, not a whiny wuss who always moans "nice guys finish last, wa wa wa!" :P



moomin
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02 Apr 2006, 9:48 am

well, it's like most guys like a woman who is feminine- don't they? and women like guys to me somewhat masculine. The last 2 guys i've been out with were intellectual, not great looking, but there was some thing 'masculine' about them.
i know that most men don't see me as a girl they would like to go out, i'm the female version of the nice guy. But i don't complain about it! In fact i rather like that guys aren't hitting on me all the time and not knowing wether they like me for who i am or wether they just want to 'shag' me.



baby
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02 Apr 2006, 9:56 am

I don't know about women not wanting nice guys but, i would always prefer someone who is prepared to treat me with respect and not treat me like a posession.

baby



LePetitPrince
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02 Apr 2006, 9:58 am

Serissa wrote:
I has assumed it was extremely obvious that I was being extremely sarcastic on the thread due not only to the content alone but the purposeful atrocious slaughtering of the English language (I type badly but I'm not THAT bad).


behind sacarism there 's always some degree of truth .



LePetitPrince
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02 Apr 2006, 10:01 am

TheGreyBadger wrote:
I've been trying to figure out why not so nice guys have been exciting to women since Day One. I think it's because their guts feel "If I have a child with him, my son will be a Slytherin and have the edge over all the other guys." And nobody wants a wimp. But a strong quiet nice guy? You bet! Except for the sort who define "nice" so narrowly they're going to impose their definitions on you because it's rooted in a set of rules they have memorized. For instance, that you're not supposed to argue with them. (true experience). But thinking nice guys? Where are they all?

Of course, define "girls" and "females". If you're chasing the cheerleaders and ignoring the labmate you think of as a sister, or worse yet, a "dog", I'm not shedding any tears. Be warned!


I hate shallow cheerlearders :?



CockneyRebel
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02 Apr 2006, 12:07 pm

I want a proper Gentleman who will treat me with respect.



Fiz
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02 Apr 2006, 1:46 pm

[/quote]exaclt moonim most women want to date REAL men, not a whiny wuss who always moans "nice guys finish last, wa wa wa!" :P[/quote]

This is very true, people have their own bricks to carry, why would you then want to carry someone else's sack of bricks when they will only weigh you down? At the end of the day this is what whiny blokes do, they can't sort out their own heads and expect their partner to do it for them when they get one, 'do you love me?' 'will you still love me tomorrow?'. As much as I am a very supportive person and realise that not everyone can be happy all the time, I am not equipped to sort other people's heads out for them as I am not them and I have to keep my own intact.



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02 Apr 2006, 4:04 pm

I don't think it's so much that women want 'not-so-nice' guys, as it is they want to be 'wooed'. With 'bad-boys', women are taken on an adventure. They don't know what will happen next. The guy is charming, unpredictable, mysterious, inately manly. This is why nice guys get ignored. Because they don't give girls the excitment they want. I think I could score a girl if I were a nice guy, yet adventorous at the same time.



jman
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02 Apr 2006, 5:09 pm

Odda wrote:
I don't think it's so much that women want 'not-so-nice' guys, as it is they want to be 'wooed'. With 'bad-boys', women are taken on an adventure. They don't know what will happen next. The guy is charming, unpredictable, mysterious, inately manly. This is why nice guys get ignored. Because they don't give girls the excitment they want. I think I could score a girl if I were a nice guy, yet adventorous at the same time.


Odda,

have you totally neglected to read this thread? You keep claiming that women only want bad guys which is just a myth. Perhaps their is something you're doing that turns women off. You should find out what it is and change it.



ELLCIM
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02 Apr 2006, 5:46 pm

jman wrote:
Odda wrote:
I don't think it's so much that women want 'not-so-nice' guys, as it is they want to be 'wooed'. With 'bad-boys', women are taken on an adventure. They don't know what will happen next. The guy is charming, unpredictable, mysterious, inately manly. This is why nice guys get ignored. Because they don't give girls the excitment they want. I think I could score a girl if I were a nice guy, yet adventorous at the same time.


Odda,

have you totally neglected to read this thread? You keep claiming that women only want bad guys which is just a myth. Perhaps their is something you're doing that turns women off. You should find out what it is and change it.


I'm not going to get too deep into this discussion, but I have to note that by no means do all women prefer bad guys. It's not a myth however that women prefer exciting guys with a whole lot of confidence, and it happens that some, if not many, of these guys happen to be also jerks.

Also, if there is something Odda, or myself, is doing that turns women off, it is a lot easier said than done to "change" oneself, especially if you're an Aspie and don't like change. Identifying that thing is also difficult, because few women will actually tell a guy what they do wrong. I know one young woman who has a guy friend who is an Aspie, and he asked her endlessly to tell him what is wrong with him. She finally did tell him, but she found it to be an upsetting experience.



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02 Apr 2006, 9:25 pm

Somewhere around ninth grade, I got the idea that today's man was emotionally sensitive and everything, so I began exploring my feelings in great depth and trying to figure out ways to be more open about my emotions to others and be considerate of other people's wants and needs. I suspected this would be a surefire way to get women, especially as I grew older and improved at being sensitive.

Women like this; they think it's sweet. Combine it with a sense of humor, and women really start to think you might have an attractive personality. The aspie inability to maintain eye contact can come off as flirtatious, and I have learned that, if I make a few such glances at a woman while talking and joking with another group of people, they tend to become interested.

If I'm just boringly kind and friendly when talking to a woman (which I admit I tend to), the woman will lose interest within minutes of an initial enthusiasm. I have to learn to be a better and more interesting conversationalist if I want to make friends and meet women and not just have casual acquaintances. A woman then moves away from her initial impression and lumps me into the "nice guys" category because I overdo it.

I am not "nice" because I'm afraid that, if I'm not, they won't like me but rather because I believe in kindness and like being nice. When I need to, I can assert myself to whatever level necessary. Acting haughty and spiteful is obviously not going to make a person many friends, though, so kindness wins the day.

I have found that, since my first stratagem requires a great deal of effort and does not pay off frequently enough, I have tried the prospects of "random play" on Facebook.com—without any more success. Actually, if I try to send women instant messages through this method—even though their profiles advertise "random play"—they tend to react by saying they are not sl*ts. Love and sex require men to jump through too many hoops with lots of risk and a low chance of success (for me, successes n = 0 so far).