Disappearing Friends
I used to have tons of friends in elementary school, but they rarely called me. I had to call them EVERY SINGLE TIME. I was ALWAYS the one inviting them places and I was rarely invited to birthday parties after Grade 3. I was invited to one if Grade 4. These friends always told me they would invite me, but they never did.
Now, in high school, one of those kids is in my math class. She has not said ONE WORD to be the whole year! Same with 80% of the other kids.
Now, my friends are all older than me, I have friends but no PEERS friends. It seems like a lot of the kids are in cliques and don't want to make any new friends. I think this is one of the reasons I have so much trouble with peers.
By the way, they older friends seem a lot more interested in me than my peer friends in elementary school.
A friend which I have who is diagnosed with Asperger's recently complained to me that I am about "50%" of his friends, and started to move into his loneliness, before drawing out from the fear that his rant would make me reject him. I myself have multiple acquaintances, and at least every other day, someone is calling or contacting me. I only have a few close friends, but that is because it is so hard to find people to be able to relate to.
Unfortunately, this is a big hint that they don't want to be friends with you. They're just being polite when they take your phone calls or promise to hang out with you.
And if you're continuing to keep calling and hoping for these same people, you're definitely being way too clingy and needy. Don't limit yourself to this one group. First think about what they do that you don't, and make sure you're behaving in a socially acceptable way. But the fact that you haven't heeded your peers' hints about their lack of interest in you, it tells me that you're not noticing those unwritten social rules.
Unwritten rule: If you're the one doing all the calling and inviting, they don't want to be friends. And the more you call and invite them, the more you repel them by acting too desperate or stalkerish.
Unwritten rule: The fact that you're calling members of the same group will cause them to talk about you behind your back in a bad way. Meaning this will reinforce their disinterest in ever being friends with you. It's a dumb flock mentality thing.
(Well, actually I suppose that rule is written as of now. )
Anyway, you've got to reflect a little and learn about those kinds of things. Then, leave that group behind and exercise your new skills to new people! BUT....the key is, they can't be related to the old group AT ALL.
Good luck!
And if you're continuing to keep calling and hoping for these same people, you're definitely being way too clingy and needy. Don't limit yourself to this one group. First think about what they do that you don't, and make sure you're behaving in a socially acceptable way. But the fact that you haven't heeded your peers' hints about their lack of interest in you, it tells me that you're not noticing those unwritten social rules.
Unwritten rule: If you're the one doing all the calling and inviting, they don't want to be friends. And the more you call and invite them, the more you repel them by acting too desperate or stalkerish.
Unwritten rule: The fact that you're calling members of the same group will cause them to talk about you behind your back in a bad way. Meaning this will reinforce their disinterest in ever being friends with you. It's a dumb flock mentality thing.
(Well, actually I suppose that rule is written as of now. )
Anyway, you've got to reflect a little and learn about those kinds of things. Then, leave that group behind and exercise your new skills to new people! BUT....the key is, they can't be related to the old group AT ALL.
Good luck!
This guy gives some damn good advice. I suspect the OP may already realize it too, but they're in sort of in denial. I'd follow Chainsaw's advice, with emphasis on the bold part.
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