Repeating things and stating the obvious

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So one of the thigns i notice is that I tend to say the same types of things to people over and over like "whats good", "hows it going" etc. I will literally greet them the same way and carry on converations in similar patterns everytime i see them. Its hard to break out of that groove and rhythm of saying the same things.

I also tend to state the obvious (like I observe things and draw conclusions about it and tell people about it...but ppl find that odd). A lot of what I say is just getting information and giving it- including looking at everything around me and figureing out the "bottom line" of something . Basically its like I just find out the cause and effect of everything and then determine the course of action depending on what I conclude.



Could this be my ADD, or do some other aspies have this behavior as well?

Last edited by tangomike on 03 Nov 2010, 12:23 am, edited 1 time in total.

I do this too...it could be an aspie thing....bcs we learn social niceties like saying "nice to meet you" by rote....it doesn't come naturally to us.....hence the lack of variation.............

I used to do the rote greeting thing because (1) I was scared stiff to talk to people and (2) I could care less how they were. Eventually I thawed enough to realize (1) some people are not disposed to bite my head off and (2) not caring about people is a good way to turn them into biters. So I learned to use different greetings and inflections and sometimes I even care about the answer.

I have never been guilty of stating the obvious, however. It was so important to utter something brilliant and portentious that after the awkward greeting I was completely mute.

I have been told I state the obvious or repeat what others have said or repeat what I have said.


I also tend to repeat things in small talk, it's all scripted. I think it's like that for everyone though. I don't get it and get why people do it. I hear even they don't get it but they do it anyway because it's part of the social rules.

Guilty: This sounds exactly the sort of thing I would do.

I do both, but I try to avoid patterns of any kind these days, so I also pay attention that I don't repeat patterns of greeting and other social constructs too much.

I have a monthly informal meeting with other people on the spectrum every month - which is why I have been less active on WP this year than I have in previous years - and as far as I can tell, I'm the only one whose main contribution to conversation is stating the obvious. I'm absolutely dreadful in that respect, but I just don't have that much interesting to say. I do it on forums too!

Aside and slightly off-topic: something that's been bothering me at work is, how I have a colleague who dislikes me, while I do not dislike him. But he just doesn't like that I'm always so quiet and don't generally join in conversations at work (because I usually don't know what to add to the convo); it bothers him. BUT I always say 'good morning' and 'good day' to him, so it's not like I cut him off. But whatever, he has a problem with me, I'm not trying to have a problem with him. What the curmudge said above reminded me of this.

Well, atleast you dont make a wierd face after repeating someone. I mean, how embarressing!

Sounds like my new workplace.. I am polite to everyone I work with and always greet them cheerfully and ask if there is anything I can help out with, but since I do not have much to contribute to banter, I find my superiors getting more and more sarcastic with their "have a good day"-s. Then I end up as the sounding board for everyone's complaints.. maybe they assume me to be a whiner because I do not speak much, but I am just focusing on doing my job and keeping my thoughts positive and all my tasks straight in my head. One guy I work with usually flirts with me or teases me about being weird (he is a little bit neurotic too, and has no problem pointing out his oddness) but when I don't respond to his banter with more than a laugh or some kind of affirmation, he starts asking me if he's said something that has made me angry. People frequently think I am mad- then when they imply that I'm angry, I start to wonder if maybe I should be!

I'm the opposite, I rarely state (what I think is the) obvious and often leave people puzzled by how I get from A to point D. In fact, I've always thought stating the obvious was something normal people do and a skill I still need to work on.

I'm guessing it's not so much what you say but how you say it.

i have a problem with actually telling the same stories over and over. my life is pretty boring, so i only have a limited number of experiences to draw from/talk about at any given time. i will often find myself talking about something and then realize in my head that i may have already shared that particular story with that particular group of people. it used to be really bad when i was younger-i remember one time, i was in the car with my mom after just having dropped a friend off at her house, and my mom said "you realize you've told her that story at least 6 times, right?" so i guess my interactions are scripted to a large degree.

I have a habit of repeating instructions that people say to me. e.g. my teacher will say 'Elliot, i want you to write down your homework' and i will repeat it out loud to myself. Its a habit i've had from being a little kid and it used to drive my mum mad.
I also get told that I have the same conversations with people over and over again and that i use the same sentence structure. e.g. when i get on the bus i always say '80p please' to the bus driver and then he takes my money and i get on with it, but if he says something to me or asks me to repeat it, i have no idea how to respond.

I think repeating instructions aloud is a good tactic for remembering them, and maybe that tactic can progress to becoming a redundancy, but it happens to everyone.

For example, yesterday I was at the deli ordering a sandwich and noticed that the sandwich prep people would shout out their orders to the cook stationed behind them. One preppers would yell 'turkey burger!' and the cook would shout back 'one turkey burger!' After a few rounds of this, one of the preppers turned around and asked the only cook who was working, "Just you on today, huh?" and the cook automatically shouted back, "Just you on today!"

Oftentimes, my wife will say to me, " Does it sound better coming out of your mouth?" in response to me repeating aloud things she has just said. I guess I don't even realize I'm doing it at times.

I catch myself doing that a lot.

My whole life I wondered why I used to do such things and look like an idiot.
Now I think I have more control over it. It's like an additional mindset that I have to put into my mind every time I have a conversation with someone - try to say something new and interesting.
It works but the problem is, having AS requires me running so many mindsets that's almost impossible to manage all of them at the same time in a conversation, and eventually something fail
As a computer engineer I cannot avoid comparing this situation with processes (programs) running inside a computer, which cpu cannot handle all of the payload

If there's a word I like the sound of (and it a can be anything) I tend to use it excessively at any possible opportunity where that word might be fitting. I’m getting better about filtering that out, though.