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Titangeek
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02 Dec 2010, 11:05 pm

if normal is an insult what dose it mean when some one says "be cool, just act normal" (just the best example i could thing of, some one just said it in a movie im watching)


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kfisherx
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02 Dec 2010, 11:17 pm

Titangeek wrote:
if normal is an insult what dose it mean when some one says "be cool, just act normal" (just the best example i could thing of, some one just said it in a movie im watching)


You got me guys... Funny that a bunch of us "disordered" folks are trying to educate each other. Like the blind leading the blind here....

I was just diagnosed a few weeks ago and am just coming to the realization that I am the one disordered here and that there are a buttload of words that have emotional meanings tied to them. My whole life, I always knew that some people got upset about some words. I always figured that those people were broken and that they were making things up and also they were the minority. Only now I am realizing that the MAJORITY of people understand that there are emotions tied to words (not implicit in their definitions) and that I am the minority here.

I am looking for the matrix or keycode now to these words. Haven't found one yet.

Still doesn't change the fact that I don't get it.



jojobean
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02 Dec 2010, 11:57 pm

kfisherx wrote:
Holy crap you guys are from the portland area too? I will be meeting you next weekend if you go to the meeting! How cool is that? :)

Roger already let me in. ;)

I got a lecture by several of my friends for using the word, "normal" as well as "nt" I have no freak'n clue what to call non-ASD people anymore. :roll:


we can greet them as earthlings


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Titangeek
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02 Dec 2010, 11:58 pm

jojobean wrote:
kfisherx wrote:
Holy crap you guys are from the portland area too? I will be meeting you next weekend if you go to the meeting! How cool is that? :)

Roger already let me in. ;)

I got a lecture by several of my friends for using the word, "normal" as well as "nt" I have no freak'n clue what to call non-ASD people anymore. :roll:


we can greet them as earthlings


that's how i great every one already, lol


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jojobean
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03 Dec 2010, 12:08 am

kfisherx wrote:
Titangeek wrote:
if normal is an insult what dose it mean when some one says "be cool, just act normal" (just the best example i could thing of, some one just said it in a movie im watching)


You got me guys... Funny that a bunch of us "disordered" folks are trying to educate each other. Like the blind leading the blind here....

I was just diagnosed a few weeks ago and am just coming to the realization that I am the one disordered here and that there are a buttload of words that have emotional meanings tied to them. My whole life, I always knew that some people got upset about some words. I always figured that those people were broken and that they were making things up and also they were the minority. Only now I am realizing that the MAJORITY of people understand that there are emotions tied to words (not implicit in their definitions) and that I am the minority here.

I am looking for the matrix or keycode now to these words. Haven't found one yet.

Still doesn't change the fact that I don't get it.


It has more to do with the culture in which the word is used and the cultural history of that word...a good example is the N word. Which now we dont even say it unless we are racist. At one time it was acceptible, but durring the civil rights era, the african americans prefered to be called colored, but then much abuse was said in that name too, so they changed it to geographical labeling rather than skin tone labeling and that seems to work better for them.
It all has be in how the word was used in a cultural past as to what emotions it causes.

We in america live in a individualist culture so being normal or typical could be seen by some as an insult because people want to be unique individuals, but God forbid if the majority is lumped together like the minority has been for centuries :roll:


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League_Girl
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03 Dec 2010, 1:41 am

kfisherx wrote:
Holy crap you guys are from the portland area too? I will be meeting you next weekend if you go to the meeting! How cool is that? :)

Roger already let me in. ;)

I got a lecture by several of my friends for using the word, "normal" as well as "nt" I have no freak'n clue what to call non-ASD people anymore. :roll:



Cool, we'll see you then. I go to every meeting but occasionally I will miss it. I am sometimes busy or I lose track of time and forget.


Quote:
You got me guys... Funny that a bunch of us "disordered" folks are trying to educate each other. Like the blind leading the blind here....

I was just diagnosed a few weeks ago and am just coming to the realization that I am the one disordered here and that there are a buttload of words that have emotional meanings tied to them. My whole life, I always knew that some people got upset about some words. I always figured that those people were broken and that they were making things up and also they were the minority. Only now I am realizing that the MAJORITY of people understand that there are emotions tied to words (not implicit in their definitions) and that I am the minority here.

I am looking for the matrix or keycode now to these words. Haven't found one yet.

Still doesn't change the fact that I don't get it.


I once used the word "claim" at babycenter and it offended some women. Geez, isn't claim another way of saying "says?" I can say "she claims to have three kids" or "she says she has three kids." What is the difference?

Reminds me of the time I said cheap or the time I said "dump" than "drop." My aunt was offended with the word "cheap" and some mother on Yahoo Answers was offended when I told her good thing she checked out this daycare first before dumping her kids off there.

I think I have my way with words and I just pick up what I hear and use them that way. I know I got cheap and dump from my dad. He always says to me "I'll dump you off at home" "I'll dump you off at the bookstore"'I'll dump you off at work" and I never took offense. Plus my mom was using irony when she was calling herself cheap because she was being frugal and my dad said my aunt and uncle are cheap just because they don't travel for things that happen out of their state they live in. And my dad calls me cheap and so does my husband and I never take offense. I can see why i would call my aunt and uncle that because if people are going to be calling me cheap, I can see why I would be calling other people cheap. And I don't even feel I am getting insulted when I get called cheap.

Now I am finding out "I also should add" means something bad and "go figure." Using those words sure gave me a drama from another user on another forum. Maybe I should just stop using words I hear and phrases. :? Gosh that be hard. It's like maybe I should never speak again. Am I still having echolalia? I dunno.


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duck
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03 Dec 2010, 1:54 am

i don't use it because i feel like i'm uttering a slur.

i don't know if it's offensive, but i feel like it might be. or, at least, a pointless term coined to get the feeling of belonging to a group. that may not even be true at all (probably used for convenience, in all reality), but... i get that bad taste in my mouth when i think about using "NT."

i don't care for "aspie" just the same.



shibashaba
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03 Dec 2010, 2:03 am

I think thats silly. We spend so much time and effort trying to be accepted by NTs just because they generally aren't willing to take us the way we are. Everytime I leave my bedroom I consider it to be an insult to my being. If I want to insult an NT by calling them an NT then thats just how its gonna be.



Titangeek
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03 Dec 2010, 2:30 am

Lady's and gentlemen (and miscellaneous martians), i think we have just found out how political correctness got started.


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03 Dec 2010, 2:57 am

League_Girl wrote:
[
I once used the word "claim" at babycenter and it offended some women. Geez, isn't claim another way of saying "says?" I can say "she claims to have three kids" or "she says she has three kids." What is the difference?



With "claims" there is an implication that you didn't believe the claim. It's not there with "says", which is more neutral, although that can change depending on tone of voice.


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03 Dec 2010, 3:05 am

Who_Am_I wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
[
I once used the word "claim" at babycenter and it offended some women. Geez, isn't claim another way of saying "says?" I can say "she claims to have three kids" or "she says she has three kids." What is the difference?



With "claims" there is an implication that you didn't believe the claim. It's not there with "says", which is more neutral, although that can change depending on tone of voice.



I remember looking it up in the dictionary too and one of the definitions said "to state as a fact." So that made the situation even more confusing for me because I obviously used the word right. :?


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ScottyN
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03 Dec 2010, 3:05 am

I always did find the term insulting and derogatory. I try not to use the term as much as possible. But that is just me: others have their own opinions.



ediself
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03 Dec 2010, 3:09 am

lol @ "the term"...i think we have a new "N word" , the word that shall not be pronounced... oh lord.



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03 Dec 2010, 3:28 am

League_Girl wrote:
Who_Am_I wrote:
League_Girl wrote:
[
I once used the word "claim" at babycenter and it offended some women. Geez, isn't claim another way of saying "says?" I can say "she claims to have three kids" or "she says she has three kids." What is the difference?



With "claims" there is an implication that you didn't believe the claim. It's not there with "says", which is more neutral, although that can change depending on tone of voice.



I remember looking it up in the dictionary too and one of the definitions said "to state as a fact." So that made the situation even more confusing for me because I obviously used the word right. :?


As a foreigner, I have learnt this word with its negative connotation though I found it in other contexts where it clearly meant "state as a fact", but it always seem to mean that the statement has no justification therefore is not legitimate (i.e : you arrive on an island and claim it yours even though other people may already live there).

However, I tend to make the same mistake in my own language so I learn the way the words are used now, what they used to mean and their etymology (I have a strong interest in understanding language and communication), but still, there are many things you can't say now because people no longer seem to hear the same word.

Like : "I am fat." I said that once, when I was 10kg overweight, and everyone was like "no you are not fat, you are a little chubby." Well, stating that you or someone is fat (or skinny) is taken as an insult nowadays though the word in itself is neutral.

I did not know about ""I also should add", but languages are always changing because of the people who use it. In my language, "réaliser" means "to build" but now almost everyone uses it to say "to realise" and it's hard to understand somtimes.

I think we live in a word where more and more words are becoming insulting because people do not like to be reminded about their condition.

I mean, I've seen a lot of NTs (without any disorder because lots of people with learning difficulties don't consider themselves NTs, and schizophrenics sometimes insists on their label) calling themselves NT, they do not seem to take it badly at all, the other are not aware of this "label" and do not care.

It's just like Autistic people, they call themselves autistic even though some ignorant people uses this word to insult other people who are not autistic at all. :roll:

You know, "taking things literally" is a characteristic of Autism but when you look closely at the society, paranoia seems to become a norm since some people take everything as an insult no matter what the context is.



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03 Dec 2010, 4:01 am

I still think that all this time NT's have been labeling others who are not the norm, that it is just poetic justice that they would be offended at being grouped together and labeled. I think that it is only fair if they label us as retarded or selfish or whatever that we have the leverage to call them NT's even if that bothers them.


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03 Dec 2010, 4:06 am

jojobean wrote:
I still think that all this time NT's have been labeling others who are not the norm, that it is just poetic justice that they would be offended at being grouped together and labeled. I think that it is only fair if they label us as retarded or selfish or whatever that we have the leverage to call them NT's even if that bothers them.

i strongly agree with this. i know others will go all rethorical on me again, saying we should act and think better than they do, but sincerely, what if they object? i also object to being dismissed as incapable of being socially productive.