obsessive compulsive disorder is it a curse or gift

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I understand that. I suffered that in the past and sometimes suffer from it in nowadays. I think that I learned to block my minds. But because of this sometimes I block more that I need, so it is hard to remember things which are not "bad".

Mine were a curse.

Not only were they were a living hell no-one I knew could understand.. they had no real benefit in my everyday life.

I am not diagnosed as having OCD. But I read some description of it. And I saw a lot of symptoms which were right for me. And almost all symptoms were right. I suffered from OCD in the past. I didn't know that I have disorder, I thought that only I have such a problem. But I almost stopped my disorder. At least I think so. Perhaps disorder didn't make me any problems. When I found that there exist such a disorder I remembered my problems. Now I see that I do some regular actions which had become natural. Now I understand that OCD can make me problems again. But know I am more experienced, I know how to fight with it. Or not. I don't know.
Also it disturb me to make mental actions like mathematical operations. Despite this I know that I can make mathematical operations and mathematics is the best stage for me. I just need to concentrate and everything is OK. But I can to concentrate only in special situations.

wow it seems only a few people actually like OCD.
i most be weird or something.

xemnas: i'm been telling you that for a long time now.
*dumps water on him*
xemnas: THE HELL WAS THAT FOR!! !
being an ass.
xemnas: i hate you so damn much.
i know.

I have some internals which are good for me. That is cabability to do mathematics, analyze, do clear conclusions, know that there are not any matter-of-course things. But I am not sure that these internals were caused by OCD. If it caused OCD, than I can say that OCD can be useful