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nthach
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12 Jan 2011, 2:24 am

Well, I had a clear mind for the past 48 hours until I came here. I don't think I'll ever find a partner. I think this forum has validated the fact that aspie men are not capable of entering relationships, not capable of love. I think I should really just kill myself. I don't think I'll ever win the game of life.

Don't bother saying things will get better for me or I need to seek help. Help in the eyes of a doctor or a shrink is just Prozac, Zyprexa, Depakote, or Valium. I AM NOT TAKING PILLS TO FIX THIS PROBLEM.



Esther
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12 Jan 2011, 2:31 am

Do what it is you have to do. Just don't kill yourself.



Kiran
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12 Jan 2011, 2:42 am

you're not worthless, nobody is. And aspie men can have sucessful relationships, i know at least two aspie men IRL who are in relationships, one of them is actually married with two kids. So, it's not hopeless.
I think you're beating yourself down to much. Cut yourself some slack, nobody's perfect. Also you seem extremly depressed, maybe you should talk to a proffesional?


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nthach
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12 Jan 2011, 2:47 am

Kiran wrote:
you're not worthless, nobody is. And aspie men can have sucessful relationships, i know at least two aspie men IRL who are in relationships, one of them is actually married with two kids. So, it's not hopeless.
I think you're beating yourself down to much. Cut yourself some slack, nobody's perfect. Also you seem extremly depressed, maybe you should talk to a proffesional?

I got an appointment with Kaiser's psych department in a few days. Which I know won't work well, since they'll just give me a prescription for Prozac/Zoloft/Paxil/Lexapro and tell me have a nice day. I'm not taking meds unless I need to. I almost killed myself on Zoloft and I'm a firm believer that antidepressants make matters even worse.



menintights
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12 Jan 2011, 3:07 am

Well if you've decided you have absolutely nothing to lose, go join the army.



SaNcheNuSS
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12 Jan 2011, 3:22 am

you aren't worthless. and quit taking pills. Learn to love yourself. Its pretty basic.



iceb
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12 Jan 2011, 3:34 am

Finding a partner is unnecessary, find the things you love, walking in the mountains or forests, playing with all manor of engines, listening to or making music, painting, mapping the stars or whatever else you may like to do eventually you may find your partner finds you and if not there will always be many reasons to enjoy life.


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auntblabby
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12 Jan 2011, 3:40 am

you have a mind sufficiently powerful, to overpower your depressive self-thoughts. you know that the typical brain can only hold in working memory just one discrete thought at a time, so when you supercede that thought with another UN-negative thought, that is a victory you can build on, every time the bad thoughts recur. you can do it, and the sooner the better. the only alternative is to suppress the bad thoughts with pmeds which dampen ALL thoughts. sure, drugs have their place, but should always work hand-in-glove with pro-active changes in directed thinking. cognitive methods of busting sad thoughts work for many, i am sure they can work for you as well. you're smarter than the crowd, you can make it work. believe in yourself, take good care of your mind and it will take good care of you.



zen_mistress
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12 Jan 2011, 4:40 am

You are not worthless. I like your posts, and car comparisons to things, and you seem like a nice person. I think you will find somebody, it will just take time. (((((hugs))))).


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Aspieallien
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12 Jan 2011, 5:37 am

No one is worthless, but if you believe you are worthless you may become worthless in your own mind. The mind has the power to make you become the product of the negative thoughts and images you BELIEVE. The good news here is that in the same way your mind has the power to make you become the product of the positive thoughts and images you BELIEVE.

There is an ideal partner out there for us all, aspies included. Chances are there is some girl out there saying exactly what you are right now, and going through the same pain as you believing she will never find anyone. she may be counting on finding you. So don't kill yourself because you will never have the chance then.

I have been where you are now and worse. Things can and will get better, you have to believe it will.


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nthach
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12 Jan 2011, 11:33 am

I just feel nothing's going right for me. Sure, I may have several good things going for me such as graduating from college in 5 months. It's pretty much meaningless to me right now.



auntblabby
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12 Jan 2011, 11:50 am

nthach wrote:
I just feel nothing's going right for me. Sure, I may have several good things going for me such as graduating from college in 5 months. It's pretty much meaningless to me right now.


just think of how much it would blow to have to start all over again, from scratch, from infancy. you are an adult now, you had to go through childhood and adolescence and deal with all manner of cloistering and restrictions, and so now as a young adult you have all that behind you, and hopeful possibilities ahead of you. when you graduate from university you shall have the world by the tail. if you threw all this away over temporal concerns, that would just be a huge and tragic waste, like throwing your gifts away.
part of being young is being able to have fun unencumbered by age and infirmity and responsibilities, so i just wish you could just revel in your youth and vitality while you still have it.



nthach
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12 Jan 2011, 12:21 pm

auntblabby wrote:
if you threw all this away over temporal concerns, that would just be a huge and tragic waste, like throwing your gifts away.
part of being young is being able to have fun unencumbered by age and infirmity and responsibilities, so i just wish you could just revel in your youth and vitality while you still have it.

It does feel like a big deal to me. And I haven't gotten the opportunity to really live life. Unfortunately, as soon as I graduate from college, I feel both my social and biological timers will zero out. I think the next few years will be the shittiest years of my life.

I'm slowly turning into a few people here which I won't name names here, sadly. :(



emlion
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12 Jan 2011, 12:26 pm

So change it.
They'll only run out IF YOU LET THEM.
There'sa big wide world out there, go and grab it by the horns.



Jonsi
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12 Jan 2011, 1:18 pm

nthach wrote:
Well, I had a clear mind for the past 48 hours until I came here. I don't think I'll ever find a partner. I think this forum has validated the fact that aspie men are not capable of entering relationships, not capable of love. I think I should really just kill myself. I don't think I'll ever win the game of life.

Don't bother saying things will get better for me or I need to seek help. Help in the eyes of a doctor or a shrink is just Prozac, Zyprexa, Depakote, or Valium. I AM NOT TAKING PILLS TO FIX THIS PROBLEM.
I'm in a relationship, and I'm an extreme case of Asperger's. You're not worthless. You just need to have confidence in yourself. You can do it. :D



nthach
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12 Jan 2011, 2:58 pm

auntblabby wrote:
just think of how much it would blow to have to start all over again, from scratch, from infancy.

I think that would be the best thing for me to do. If computers can be rebooted, why can't we?