Board index › General Discussion › News and Current Events

Man names his baby girl Facebook

Page 2 of 3 [ 38 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

ruveyn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2008
Age: 87
Gender: Male
Posts: 31,502
Location: New Jersey

28 Feb 2011, 4:30 pm

All of which reminds me of a story.

There is this first grade on day one of the school year. The teacher asks each pupil to stand up and say his name for the rest of the class to hear. Well the kids stand up. One says - Hello I am Mary Jones. Another stands up and says - Hello, I am Stanley Martin. Then this third kid stands up and says - Hello, I am Snot-Nose Smith. The teacher says -- Now I asked you to say your name, not to be impudent. Say your name, now. The kid replies -- My name is Snot-Nose Smith. The teacher says -- If you won't say your name you must leave and don't come back unless you being your parents here to school. So the kid gets up and on his way out he stops by his twin brother's desk and says -- Come on Bull Sh*t. She won't believe you either.

Then there is the story of the young Indian brave who asks the medicine man how he picks the names for the children of the tribe. The medicine man answers --- well, I look around and see if there are any events happening in the land the day the child is born. So I come up with names like: Strong Wind, Or Rain, or Storm Cloud or Running Bear. But tell me Two Dogs F*cking, why the sudden interest in names?

ruveyn



Jono
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 10 Jul 2008
Age: 43
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,606
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa

01 Mar 2011, 4:53 pm

ruveyn wrote:
All of which reminds me of a story.

There is this first grade on day one of the school year. The teacher asks each pupil to stand up and say his name for the rest of the class to hear. Well the kids stand up. One says - Hello I am Mary Jones. Another stands up and says - Hello, I am Stanley Martin. Then this third kid stands up and says - Hello, I am Snot-Nose Smith. The teacher says -- Now I asked you to say your name, not to be impudent. Say your name, now. The kid replies -- My name is Snot-Nose Smith. The teacher says -- If you won't say your name you must leave and don't come back unless you being your parents here to school. So the kid gets up and on his way out he stops by his twin brother's desk and says -- Come on Bull Sh*t. She won't believe you either.

Then there is the story of the young Indian brave who asks the medicine man how he picks the names for the children of the tribe. The medicine man answers --- well, I look around and see if there are any events happening in the land the day the child is born. So I come up with names like: Strong Wind, Or Rain, or Storm Cloud or Running Bear. But tell me Two Dogs F*cking, why the sudden interest in names?

ruveyn


:lmao: That was really funny. I like the story of the Indian brave.



Vigilans
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 19 Jun 2008
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,181
Location: Montreal

01 Mar 2011, 4:56 pm

ruveyn wrote:
All of which reminds me of a story.

There is this first grade on day one of the school year. The teacher asks each pupil to stand up and say his name for the rest of the class to hear. Well the kids stand up. One says - Hello I am Mary Jones. Another stands up and says - Hello, I am Stanley Martin. Then this third kid stands up and says - Hello, I am Snot-Nose Smith. The teacher says -- Now I asked you to say your name, not to be impudent. Say your name, now. The kid replies -- My name is Snot-Nose Smith. The teacher says -- If you won't say your name you must leave and don't come back unless you being your parents here to school. So the kid gets up and on his way out he stops by his twin brother's desk and says -- Come on Bull Sh*t. She won't believe you either.

Then there is the story of the young Indian brave who asks the medicine man how he picks the names for the children of the tribe. The medicine man answers --- well, I look around and see if there are any events happening in the land the day the child is born. So I come up with names like: Strong Wind, Or Rain, or Storm Cloud or Running Bear. But tell me Two Dogs F*cking, why the sudden interest in names?

ruveyn


:lmao:


_________________
Opportunities multiply as they are seized. -Sun Tzu
Nature creates few men brave, industry and training makes many -Machiavelli
You can safely assume that you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do


League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 27,205
Location: Pacific Northwest

01 Mar 2011, 5:28 pm

This also reminds me in 4th grade when my teacher wrote Nobody on the overhead. He asked us imagine if the parents named you Nobody. It be so confusing and your life be hard.

Nobody farts.
Kid: Who farted?
Other kids: Nobody
Kid: I know someone farted, who did?
Other kids: We said Nobody

And my mom said this about if your name was Nobody:

On a field trip somewhere

Teacher: Anyone want this ice cream?
Nobody wants it so he raises his hand
Student: Nobody does
Teacher: Okay I will just throw it away then

:lol:


And it also reminds me of Who is on first? by Abbot and Costello and Trouble and Shut Up.



League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 27,205
Location: Pacific Northwest

01 Mar 2011, 5:31 pm

Here is one of them:

In a small town in California there lived two boys, Shut-up and Trouble. These boys were friends, but every once-in-awhile they would get into a fight. One time after they had both just gotten ice-cream, Trouble's ice-cream fell. Trouble then stole Shut-up's ice-cream and ran away. Shut-up ran after Trouble but eventually lost him, sat on a curb, and started to cry.

A police officer pulled up and asked, “What's your name?”

“Shut-up.”

The officer got angry and asked the same question again and got the same reply. Finally, he asked the same question and got the same reply and then said, “Boy, are you looking for Trouble?”

And Shut-up said, “Yeah, that fool stole my ice-cream!”


http://www.jokes.com/funny/kids/shut-up-and-trouble



jojobean
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Aug 2009
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,341
Location: In Georgia sipping a virgin pina' colada while the rest of the world is drunk

03 Mar 2011, 12:59 am

aspiegirl2 wrote:
Idiotchief wrote:
Any one remember the dad who named his kid Espn?


Yes! The parents were fairly avid ESPN fans from what I remember. I think they pronounced it as "Espin" as compared to ESPN. I still don't understand the logic behind naming people after famous things like ESPN, Facebook, or others. I remember one of my friends who told me that some non-English speakers, for a study, were asked which English words sounded the most beautiful (without knowing their meanings). Chlamydia was one of the top on the list. I would be embarrassed for the person named Chlamydia if they ever moved to an English-speaking part of the world.


I actually heard of that happening, it was in the paper that some mother named her child Chlamydia a few years back....poor child, she is probably being called STD- girl by now.

Anyway the kid named refigerator is pretty funny and rather harmless since they are not here, but in africa.

I have a friend named Bambi, and anouther named Sunshine. I like funky names myself but I dont plan on having any kids so, I guess I will just name my next bird...."Sky" or something like that.


_________________
All art is a kind of confession, more or less oblique. All artists, if they are to survive, are forced, at last, to tell the whole story; to vomit the anguish up.
-James Baldwin


CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 49
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,561
Location: Stalag 13

08 Mar 2011, 8:25 pm

I think that I will name my kid, Wii....NOT!


_________________
Who wants to adopt a Sweet Pea?


aspiegirl2
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Feb 2005
Age: 35
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,442
Location: Washington, USA

08 Mar 2011, 11:30 pm

No joke: I had an uncle named Dawn, and then he ended up marrying a woman named Thomas (this was also during the 1910s or 20s that he was born lol).


_________________
I'm 24 years old and live in WA State. I was diagnosed with Asperger's at 9. I received a BS in Psychology in 2011 and I intend to help people with Autistic Spectrum Disorders, either through research, application, or both. On the ?Pursuit of Aspieness?.