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Captain_Brown
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16 Jul 2006, 3:48 pm

Why do you think friends are important in life?



Tim_Tex
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16 Jul 2006, 3:55 pm

Friends can provide emotional support when you are in a bind. They can help you when you need something. They can be there when you can depend on your own instincts.

Tim



pi_woman
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16 Jul 2006, 4:05 pm

I think friends are particularly important in an Aspie's life for several reasons:

1) Tolerance. They're willing and able to accept us "as is".

2) Reality check. They help us to see and understand social issues we often miss.

3) De-sensitization. Enjoying the someone's company helps heal the pain and learned avoidance behaviors from previous bad encounters/relationships.

4) Mentoring. They provide a safe, supportive environment to learn and practice social skills.

5) Broadening your horizons. They expose us to parts of life we may have missed due to ignorance, lack of resources, or lack of access.


Great topic.

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Raph522
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16 Jul 2006, 4:27 pm

friends are inportant because they can or can try to understand you. and if they don't they still like you and don't make fun of you. it is good to have people like that around you. i don't think peopel have to have real friends. imaginary, pet, or family member are good friends



Musical_Lottie
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16 Jul 2006, 6:15 pm

pi_woman wrote:
I think friends are particularly important in an Aspie's life for several reasons:

1) Tolerance. They're willing and able to accept us "as is".

2) Reality check. They help us to see and understand social issues we often miss.

3) De-sensitization. Enjoying the someone's company helps heal the pain and learned avoidance behaviors from previous bad encounters/relationships.

4) Mentoring. They provide a safe, supportive environment to learn and practice social skills.

5) Broadening your horizons. They expose us to parts of life we may have missed due to ignorance, lack of resources, or lack of access.


I cannot help but agree thoroughly.


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Veresae
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16 Jul 2006, 7:56 pm

Well, who else are you gonna talk to about your girl problems?

"OOOOH, so you're saying I SHOULDN'T say that to her? Wouldn't have known it."



Musical_Lottie
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17 Jul 2006, 11:32 am

Veresae wrote:
Well, who else are you gonna talk to about your girl problems?

"OOOOH, so you're saying I SHOULDN'T say that to her? Wouldn't have known it."


It's also nice to have someone who understands why you feel so rubbish, being a female ...


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Morphia
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17 Jul 2006, 12:44 pm

You can talk about things of mutual interest - this is what i usually do with my friends.

They can tell you when your getting things wrong, with people and social stuff, this can be very useful.

They can drag you away from your set routines and make you do things you would never have done otherwise.

If their a true friend they wont mind your quirks and problems with socialising and it will be easier to relax with them...then you mind find out what all those NT's get from their relationships!


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TigerFire
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17 Jul 2006, 2:01 pm

Well if you don't want to be loner the rest of your life and have little contact with anyone. Fending for your self and other things like that. Also not having anyone to help you out or comfort you when you're down then you'll be fine. I'm going to try to make some friends off line but I haven't done anything like that.


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hale_bopp
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17 Jul 2006, 11:49 pm

I don't really see friends as anything other than someone to do stuff with.

Probably because most of my friends treated me like sh*t.



AaronAgassi
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18 Jul 2006, 4:00 am

"It's not what you know, but who you know."

Meaning, of course, that connections even for the most rank incompetents and scoundrels are all too often so much more key to success even than the very greatest ability, all too often unrecognized and unrewarded. Or, var: It’s not what you know or who you know, but who you sorta-know. In other words, six degrees of separation and all that. -Facility in extended networking has been found to bring to light the competitive plumb opportunities first. Or, var: It's not who you know, but who knows you! Purport: It shall be the propagation of glowing reputation and standing that draws oppportunity and opens many doors.


"He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare,
And he who has one enemy will meet him everywhere."
-Ali ibn Abi Talib, 4th caliph (602-661)


"Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate."
- Thomas Jones


4:7 Then I returned, and I saw vanity under the sun.
4:8 There is one alone, and there is not a second; yea, he hath neither child nor brother: yet is there no end of all his labour; neither is his eye satisfied with riches; neither saith he, For whom do I labour, and bereave my soul of good? This is also vanity, yea, it is a sore travail.
04:9 Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.
4:10 For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe to him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up.
4:11 Again, if two lie together, then they have heat: but how can one be warm alone?
4:12 And if one prevail against him, two shall withstand him; and a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

-Ecclesiastes, King James version


"Philosophers, writers, artists, even scientists, not only need encouragement and an audience, they need constant stimulation from other people. It is almost impossible to think without talking. If Defoe had really lived on a desert island, he could not have written Robinson Crusoe, nor would he have wanted to. Take away freedom of speech, and the creative faculties dry up."

'Conversation with a Pacifist' by George Orwell
http://www.resort.com/~prime8/Orwell/pacifist.html


"I think a man only needs one thing in life. He just needs someone to love. If you can't give him that, then give him something to hope for. And if you can't give him that, just give him something to do."
-James Liddle

Memorable Quotes from
Flight of the Phoenix (remake, 2004)
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0377062/quotes


True love does not come by finding the perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.  
— Jason Jordan


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tcorrielus
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25 Jul 2006, 1:45 pm

Tim_Tex wrote:
Friends can provide emotional support when you are in a bind. They can help you when you need something. They can be there when you can depend on your own instincts.

Tim


I agree. That's why I've longed for friends all that time.



AaronAgassi
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25 Jul 2006, 2:18 pm

What to do?



rhubarbpluscustard
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30 Jul 2006, 9:04 pm

When I'm with my friends, I'm happy. I feel relaxed and confident and liked and affectionate and trustful. I have a great time; I have a laugh. That's why my friends are important to me. In fact they're too important. I get passionately attached to my friends; I'm as jealous over them as a lover.



waterdogs
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30 Jul 2006, 9:14 pm

i'd like to have some friends, ever since ive been out of highschool and even then it wasn't really that easy for me to get any friends. i just dont know how to go out in public and make friends with someone. all the people that work at lowell observatory are a little sick of me talking with them i think, (i call them atleast once a week) to see if they have any jobs open and when they say "no" i quickly change the subject to space. wich im sure doesn't bother them since thats the business there in but still.

also if i do start up a conversation out of nowhere with someone their always older than me. like they could be my grandpa :roll: :x



Musical_Lottie
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31 Jul 2006, 6:04 pm

rhubarbpluscustard wrote:
When I'm with my friends, I'm happy. I feel relaxed and confident and liked and affectionate and trustful. I have a great time; I have a laugh. That's why my friends are important to me. In fact they're too important. I get passionately attached to my friends; I'm as jealous over them as a lover.


Ah, yes. I get very protective, almost maternal over my friends - but also as jealous as a lover. Is this is bad thing?


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