Do people ever think your a cold-hearted b***h?

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Ai_Ling
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29 Mar 2011, 2:38 pm

You know I saw the ditz thread and I thought of asking people if they are perceived as bitchy cause Im pretty sure I am.

For 1 everyone thinks Im very smart, Im majoring in Biochem and I study in the library long hrs. Unfortunetly being smart on certain areas doesnt mean Im smart in other areas which is something many NTs dont realize. I can be rather socially tactless at times which comes across as purposely bitchy and rude because people probably think I know what Im doing since they think Im so smart.

One someone talks to me 1 on 1 I have a decent conversation, articulate myself fairly well. When Im in groups, Im pretty bad at communicating, I stay really reserved most of the time and Im also bad at acknowledging/greeting people which can come off as she doesnt wanna talk to me.



emlion
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29 Mar 2011, 2:40 pm

It depends on my mood.

I'm either a cold hearted b***h, or a giggly girl. :roll:



jaffacakes
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29 Mar 2011, 2:44 pm

I can come across as bitchy, but less now as I have learned to keep quiet. Unfortunately people now think I'm aloof, which also means that females tend to ignore me.

I'm much better with guys, but there is usually a technical discussion going on and I'm OK with those.

I'm also better with 1:1 than groups, but mainly as I struggle to join a conversation and often say the wrong thing at the wrong time.

I can do that on forums too, just give me a kick if I do, I won't be offended


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deadeyexx
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29 Mar 2011, 3:12 pm

Sure, but the male version.

A stuck-up A**hole



Bloodheart
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29 Mar 2011, 3:32 pm

Yeah :(

I think where as aspies in general get called ignorant, rude, anti-social, shy, etc.
I think we female aspies in general get called cold-hearted, b***h, stuck-up, snooty, etc.
There is probably something similar with the male aspies, like deadeyexx kinda suggested.

I get it more because I don't have as strong an accent as other people locally due to speech therapy as a child (I sound posh), I'm a bit of a know-it-all and bossy which I don't mean to be but it seems to have become a coping strategy I've adopted while in work, and it takes a while of getting to know me before you realise that my arrogance isn't totally serious. I have confidence so I do come across as confident thus when I don't talk to others they assume it's because I'm stuck-up. I've been told I'm the most genuine, open-minded, and all together most lame person in the world...in other words, anything but cold-hearted, b***h, stuck-up, snooty, etc.

I can understand why they might feel like that, obviously given how I must come across, but then I've had people who don't know me, haven't talked to me, or even people who don't know my name, call me a b***h - THAT bothers me, they don't even attempt to get to know you before making these sort of assumptions and talking so meanly about you.


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Last edited by Bloodheart on 29 Mar 2011, 4:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Ai_Ling
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29 Mar 2011, 3:53 pm

Bloodheart wrote:
Yeah :(
I can understand why they might feel like that, obviously given how I must come across, but then I've had people who don't know me, haven't talked to me, or even people who don't know my name, call me a b***h - THAT bothers me, they don't even attempt to get to know you before making these sort of assumptions and talking so meanly about you.


yeah, people who know me, know I am not a b***h(majority of the time) or at least not any bitchier then your normal person, but people who dont know me: i can come across as a b***h.



IdahoRose
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29 Mar 2011, 4:29 pm

No one's ever called me a b***h before, but I wouldn't be surprised if people have thought it in their heads.



Erisad
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29 Mar 2011, 4:37 pm

Oh hell yes. Sometimes I just don't feel like giving a s**t about everyone that I pass. Don't see how that makes me a b***h but whatever. :shrug:



AspieWolf
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29 Mar 2011, 4:41 pm

I (a male of the species) have been called every name in the book and a few more besides and in several languages to boot! The nicer people just refer to me as being very opinionated.


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draelynn
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29 Mar 2011, 9:09 pm

I'm equal opportunity - I call men and women b***h... :D

Being a smart woman with an opinion and lack of the frufru girly mannerisms usually gets you the b***h label.

I have witnessed so many women playing the flirty, girly suck up role time and time again and if f*****g WORKS. WHYWHYWHY do guys BUY that crap?! Especially went it so obviously manipulative? These women who are purposely playing you to get what they want are okay but the smart girl that tells you the truth without the bells ans whistles is a b***h... it's a wonder we survived as a species.



League_Girl
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29 Mar 2011, 10:42 pm

Not cold hearted b***h, just cold hearted. But I have been called a b***h too but not a cold hearted b***h.



Kiran
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30 Mar 2011, 6:06 am

Maybe people who don't know me may think i'm cold-hearted, but people who know me know that i'm pretty hot tempered. I have some anger issues, but i prefer but to think of myself has being ''passionate'' ;)


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cubedemon6073
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30 Mar 2011, 8:20 am

I've been called a jerk, a bastard, and an as*hole.



KBerg
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30 Mar 2011, 8:46 am

I get bastard, but not b***h. Yes, even as a woman I don't get called b***h. I commented on it to someone and he just looked at me and said "Yeah, b***h doesn't really fit, you're not nearly girly enough in how you're a jerk. But sometimes you are a total bastard". Which, OK, yeah, fair enough, sometimes I am.



cassandra
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30 Mar 2011, 9:04 am

Sometimes they do, but I just ignore it. I know deep down it is not true.