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Do your friends know you're on the spectrum?
No, noone except my immediate family. 26%  26%  [ 15 ]
Only my very best friend and my immediate family. 16%  16%  [ 9 ]
A few close friends and family. 34%  34%  [ 20 ]
Almost all of my friends and family. 10%  10%  [ 6 ]
Most people I know. 9%  9%  [ 5 ]
Everyone. 5%  5%  [ 3 ]
Total votes : 58

dancinonwater
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20 Apr 2011, 10:57 pm

I'm 14 and I just got diagnosed a few weeks ago... My friends know I have ADHD, and well here's how my sort of diagnosis went:
OK, well i know this is going to seem too unofficial, but just trust me. Anyway, I was diagnosed with ADHD about a year ago, and I've been trying meds for it. At my last appointment with my psychiatrist, my dad mentioned that I have trouble controlling my emotions and anger. From there, I emidiately knew that she was thinking Asperger's (I already knew i had it, but i hadn't told anyone). We then started talking about all my Asperger's traits (this was before she even mentioned i might have it) like how i absolutely can't stand changes in plans and have some "interrests", aka the things that i spend hours every day researching and know way too much on and then talk "at" my mother about for an equal amount of hours, etc. and so finally she says, " I think that there may be just a "drop" of asperger's." Of course my parents both were like basically saying that they were already thinking that, and had even talked to my psychologist about it a bit. Oh thanks for keeping me in the loop, Mom! But i'm not mad at my mom, just to mention that, as i know she'd never do something like that that would hurt me, and she's a psychologist and always says she hates when people keep diagnoses from their kids.

Anyway, I am still confused because I know this is barely a formal diagnosis, but I know I have Asperger's Syndrome and it just explains soooo much about me, so i would really like my close friends to know (that's only 2 people, so it's not as huge of a deal, hahaha). Anyway, if you could share how you told your friends or give me any advice, that would be great! Thanks a lot guys!



MisterJ
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20 Apr 2011, 11:57 pm

I only have one close friends, and one or two other acquaintances, but I just kind of straight up told them. They seemed to take it fine and without any kind of judgement, but then again, I'm horrible at reading people.



Phonic
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21 Apr 2011, 1:39 am

"Friends"?


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TB
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21 Apr 2011, 1:58 am

you can try, but dont be dissapointed when it comes down to a quick wikipedia look. People around me know because they have been told (maybe they forgot), nobody ever brings it up. So they know but they dont really know it means and the impact, nor do they want to understand. You have to accept that you can tell other people but most of the times theyll be like ok lets move on to another subject after x amount of traits. Telling a label for you wont bring you closer or let them understand you better, you have years of experience and forum reads. The only thing they have to go on is a short conversation and some stereotypical traits.

This is just my experience, it might be different for you.



Ashuahhe
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21 Apr 2011, 4:30 am

Most people don't understand what Asgerper's is unless they have studied a degree that requires them to study it or they have a son/ daughter/ husband/ wife etc with it. This is from experience. I've only told a couple of my teachers, one looked at me like a dog that's been shown a card trick and the other said "is that where you can't relate to other people?". Family knows but doesn't quite understand the condition, especially my sisters. They just think I'm a weird, odd person who likes to keep to herself. The artist down the road from me has a son with Asgerpers and we are quite good friends. She understands what it is but there are so few people that take it seriously and understand it well. I think sometimes it's best not to tell anyone, too much to explain! If you trust them enough, go ahead and tell them. Parents knew I had Asgerpers since 9 years old and I didn't discover this until I was 18 years old. Quite shocking if you ask me



TenPencePiece
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21 Apr 2011, 6:30 am

Ashuahhe wrote:
Most people don't understand what Asgerper's is unless they have studied a degree that requires them to study it or they have a son/ daughter/ husband/ wife etc with it.


I may have still been in the dark right now about it had my mother not by chance had to study it a few years ago.

Not that many people know about my AS. Outside of family, only people with it themselves or people related to it know about it. I have one or two NT friends online, and I can come across as an NT, albeit with some eccentricities. I'm still undecided whether to tell them about it or not.


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Jonsi
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21 Apr 2011, 3:51 pm

I make AS no secret, pretty much everyone I know knows I have it.



jmnixon95
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21 Apr 2011, 5:26 pm

I DON'T REALLY TELL ANYONE.



Jonsi
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21 Apr 2011, 6:26 pm

jmnixon95 wrote:
I DON'T REALLY TELL ANYONE.

MIND-BOGGLING.



dancinonwater
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25 Apr 2011, 10:50 am

thanks for all your replies! I'm on spring break, and i stayed home sick today, so I haven't been able to talk to my friends yet. And i understand your concern about people who don't understand Aspergers, but I'm not worried. My friends have been amazing with everything i've been through with the ADHD and all, and i have to tell them that it's aspergers. I know when i tell them they'll ask questions and learn, rather than stereotyping. Anyone have any stories of when they told thier friends about their diagnosis?



Zayle79
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26 Apr 2011, 12:35 pm

I like to tell people. I like to summarize what it means for people that don't know, thus one person is forever liberated from the horrible misconceptions.



dancinonwater
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26 Apr 2011, 10:39 pm

I told my two best friends today! I just said, "You know how i've been seeing a psychiatrist for like ADHD meds? Well, last time my dad mentioned my like wierd "obsessions" and we started talking about some things we never mentioned before and she said, 'I think you have Asperger's.' " and then they asked what that was, so i basically said, "well you know what austism is right? Well, it's a mild form of it, and it explains a lot of my quirks..." I basically went on to explain some of my personal Aspie traits. I'm glad i told them! They were as good about it as i could ever have hoped! They didn't judge, just asked questions and i think our relationships will be better now that they can really understand me.



aspie48
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27 Apr 2011, 4:26 pm

one of my friends with like no prompting asked me if i had as and i said yeah then i figured if it was that obvious i should tell everyone.



Maladroit
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28 Apr 2011, 7:38 pm

I have 1 friend who already has it, who I knew had it before I knew I had it. My other friend would always mention his AS as if it were a fault or something bad. That's why I didn't tell that friend, but my friend with AS knows I have it.

My dad, mom, and sister know. My brother doesn't. 2 of my aunts know, 1 of my uncles know. That's it.



Joker
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28 Apr 2011, 7:46 pm

Everyone that knows me knows that I have AS im very proud to be a aspie and im against the cure its like im a x men character and their trying to get rid of my special powers :lol:



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14 May 2011, 10:27 am

I'm fine with telling anyone I know. It's better than having them wonder why I act the way I do.