can the popularity contest threads stop?

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this is starting to feel like high school.

you have two options maestro:

1.- don't vote
2.- rig it

I agree with computerlove. And for what it is worth katzefrau you are a cool member.

Vote zen_mistress for Prom Queen!

Last edited by emlion on 18 May 2011, 8:39 am, edited 1 time in total.

They can, but they don't seem to want to.

Tiresome they may be, but such threads aren't against the site rules. Even PPR is holding an equivalent one now... but being PPR they are doing it by an electoral process!

If you don't like such threads, don't read 'em! Simple as that really.

I can see your point, katzefrau. Am I the only one who finds it ironic that there are popularity contests amongst the steriotypically unpopular?

Yes, and there are about ten campaign threads there already not to mention they are hijacking other threads to campaign in. Best to stay out of PPR until it is over.

a few years ago when i first joined, there did not seem to be the sexual innuendo and banter and flirting etc that currently proliferates this site. i was replied to often, and i was much more participant in the discussions.

now, most of the members who i liked are gone, and there is a new set of people who are out of my league socially. i can not talk to them because i am beneath their social radar. i noticed over time, that the amount of attention my posts got dropped to almost zero, and i realized that what i had to say was no longer important because the new people were much more interested in straight out "topic-less" banter that is more for the purpose of "bonding" than sterile dissemination.

this site is coded well, and has a lot of people on it, and so, over time, people who want to flirt with others and just chit chat find this stable site and it spreads by word of mouth and before long, it is populated by people who give only a cursory glance to the fact that it was originally designed for asperger people (not "happy fun loving aspies"), and then get down to their business of just being themselves and socializing on this stable and populous platform.

a similar thing happened in real life when i was working 9-5 as a programmer in an inner city office block.

after work, me and 2 of the other IT staff would go to a small pub that we liked because it was dark and uninviting to socialites and the general meat market, and often it was just those 2 people and me that would sit there for hours discussing things that we were interested in in an otherwise mostly empty pub.

one evening, some people came in to the pub that were all flirting, and they proceeded to have a good time. the next time we went there, there was that same group of people being somewhat territorial by that early stage about the pub, and they were eyeing us off in a sort of condescending way (as my 2 IT friends assessed(i did not pay much attention to the new group at that point)).

over a few weeks, word of mouth had spread obviously, and the pub started to fill up every night with people who subscribed to a "club" style mentality, and slowly but surely me and my friends were pushed out. my friends decided to desist going to that pub, but i persisted because i can not alter routines easily, but i found myself eatring my dinner alone everyttime i went there and being harassed by the new patronage to "eat up and f*ck off" so they could occupy my table and utilize my chair.

i resisted to change my routine and i became more and more pressurized to patronize another pub somewhere else. because i was going to that pub alone simply for the food, and i had no friends there, then it seemed to management that i was hogging space in their pub that could be allocated to hip savvy young sexy flirters who would attract more business to the pub because of their "wow" factor"

i was eventually asked to leave by management and they said i could come back only in the company of other people, so i gave up and surrendered the place to the "in" crowd.

if the alex person who facilitates WP was to experience a credit crunch, and if he had to reduce the number of members on this site due to capacity problems, then i would expect that people like moog and vigilans and esther and emlion and erisad and piston head and "tea(earl grey (hot))" amd hyperlexian and wefunction and the ppr stars (ag,orwell etc)would be immune to the harvest, and i would be one of the ones that had to say good bye.

but it does not bother me. this site is just a snippet of my day, and if i can be squeezed out of my favorite eating place without going beserk, then i can resign eventually from here as well without any serious misgivings.

it is just the way the cookie crumbles. if the cookie is fresh then it will crumble into more pieces than if the cookie is stale. the cookie in this case is stale and that is all i have to say because i have lost interest suddenly in talking to this thread.

lots of typo's in my previous post. it is easier to just acknowledge them than to correct them.

yeah, i don't agree with it but i don't see a way to stop it either. the "popular" members are just the most visible members in certain forums. sometimes my name will come up, but i understand that it is because i am a frequent poster. i don't cast any vote for members in those things, except something like a "back-atcha", because i feel bad for the many people i would miss in a list.

and katzefrau, i miss you when you are not around the forums. just saying.

I don't know what to say, really. We've made some efforts as moderators to try and see that flirty/banter/low content posts contain themselves a bit. I don't think that we want to entirely banish it from WP though, as a lot of people do enjoy it, and I think it's good for us. We might not be social superstars in real life, and here's an outlet were we can be social and flirt and have fun without being pushed out of the pub by the other more popular types.

If I thought that the popularity contests were exclusionary in nature, I'd maybe be a bit more interested in stamping them out, but my perception is that no one is excluded, except by dint of not being as visible or prolific or as willing to get involved and say, 'hey I think you are cool' as other people are. In the NT world it's called reciprocation, and it's not unhealthy. I think it's a good thing to practice.

In the past there's been plenty of people saying how much they enjoy your posts, b9, I've said it before more than once. It doesn't seem to register. It's not that you're not welcome. If anyone told you to 'hurry up eating and f**k off' here, I'd be very upset.

I'd be more than happy to see a few more juicy 'meaningful' threads, but the times don't seem to support it. Maybe it's a spring/summer thing. I don't know.

Anyway, that's just a bunch of my thoughts. If anyone has any reasonable practical measures we can take to meet everyone's needs and make sure no one is neglected, I'd be happy to hear them.

PS. I seriously doubt that anyone is attracted to WP by my 'wow factor'

for the record.... i have replied to many of your posts b9..... but you, sir, do not reply to mine. that has made me feel a bit like you are not at all interested in what i say, which in all fairness may be the truth. but it makes it less enjoyable to respond to your posts.

i don't engage in the flirty banter that goes on - i have tried several times (even recently), but it is not in my nature and i end up getting ignored about 75% of the time as well. it is not bothersome to me because i know i am not able to communicate as they do, so i can't possibly "fit in". i inject factoids and i overanalyze and i try to "help" when nobody is asking for it, and that is not the nature of their conversation. i am okay with that.

i do get frustrated when it starts to get injected into a lot of threads in a forum, but if the OP doesn't mind i guess there isn't much point in complaining. a funny example is that the "Hot Aspies" thread got locked for repeatedly going off-topic, and the same kind of off-topic banter started happening in a new picture thread - the "WP Calendar". the cycle is starting all over again, in a very similar way.

I don't have much wow factor either

b9 your post was very interesting as well as quite sad. As moog says nobody here will ever tell you to "hurry up and f**k off" - or if they did a quiet word to the mods and we'd ensure that they were the ones being told to f off.

I think there is room for everyone here on WP. There is no need for anyone to feel pushed out. There is a huge range of different personalities and interests of the members here and it is normal that little clusters of friends form in different forums and that there are many others who don't connect or take part in any flirting etc. In fact probably the majority of members consider themselves to be on the outside looking in. I've always been an outsider and generally restrict myself to a handful of serious posts in Autism discussion and the rest are just playing and relaxing in Off the Wall.

I think some of the flirting is probably a good and relatively safe place for members with social problems to practice such interactions and learn from them. Many members have problems with dating etc and here is a good place for members to experiment and learn.

It seems to me that this site has two different functions.
1. To provide help, information and support for those on the spectrum.
2. To provide a social outlet. Many members have no or little social interaction with other people other than via this site.

As chairman of the Strident Atheist Oversight Committee I can assure you our election is no mere popularity contest, good sir!

If b9 feels left out, its because HE perceives himself as being left out. Honestly man, just blend it, add to the conversation, create, contribute, and enjoy the site in little chocolate snippets.

wheter you like it or not, the only constant is change.