A little less than Misogynist?

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I'm a guy, 17 years old. I don't like saying that I'm considered a Misogynist right out of the box but I do need to get this out. Hate is a strong word so I really really really don't like girls, I would tell why but I'm not trying to make enemy's in here haha! My mom told me that Aspergers feel emotions twice as more than other people is that true? Because I think it's true at least for me. I don't know if it's just me but since I was born I kept my heart wide open if you will, so naturally other people enjoyed poking it with their sharp sticks. I have never actually had a girl friend but I would always attach myself to the girl that I liked, but then my family would move and it would feel like a break up to me, sounds silly I know. I am the youngest of 11 and so I've watched my brothers get married, watch their wives boss them around, basically my brothers life's looked miserable with their wives to me and sometimes they would come to me and use me as a sound board so I have a good understanding. I found this girl I liked on a social networking website and started texting her, I would look forward to texting her everyday, especially because we understood each other so well! (You know how rare it is to be understood) A whole year went by of literally texting her everyday, including her friend, we all became pretty good friends but inevitably I told the girl that I like her, she said that I was like a brother to her. After that, things just went down hill, took half a year but to make a long story short we all hate each other but of course I still think about them. It was from that that my hatred for women stemmed, I was no longer "blind" as it were. I would go on but like I said, I want to keep the number of enemy's down to a minimum. I think my point is (I just typed this spontaneously haha) does any other Aspergers feel twice as much emotion as regular people and attach themselves to persons without the attachee having knowledge of the relationship you've created or have/had something similar to my situation.

God you're young to start hating women. My advice. Do something about it before it gets to the point where you do something illegal.

Well at least you are honest. But you're only 17 so I would not box yourself into your bitter little hole just yet. There may still be hope for you.

I believe your problem, other than the fact you have decided to hate about half of the human population by default, is that you don't understand relationships.

The first step to overcoming this, and thus getting a girl, is to stop hating women and admit that the problem is you and your misconceptions about how human relationships work. Obviously if it were them and not you, then a lot more guys would be single.

The second step to overcoming this is to accept that this can be corrected, and be willing to take the steps to correct it, namely, letting go of your misconceptions and being more open to alternate perspectives.

There are a few things you should know about relationships and human attraction, which I will explicitly state.

1. Attraction of one individual to another is forged by physical and personality characteristics, as well as well timed actions, lifestyle and philosophical commonalities, and phermones.

2. Because of the above, a person can't really help if they are or aren't attracted to you, and likewise, you can't really help if you are or aren't attracted to another person.

3. Being nice to someone does not make them fall in love with you. It's a plus but love can't be bought with it.

4. The same goes for buying things for someone.

5. Relationships take sufficient emotional IQ's to maintain. You can't approach them from a "me" perspective. You have to be able to understand the needs and wants of the other person in the relationship.

6. If you find yourself thinking things like "I deserve to be with her! Not that guy!" or "She should love me because I'm perfect for her!" then you are not ready to be in a relationship.

7. Realize that sometimes people just aren't attracted to you, just like sometimes you just aren't attracted to other people, even if they're nice.

I think that's enough to start with.

As far as what you are doing wrong as stated in your post, I think perhaps you emotionally attach yourself to a girl and allow yourself to have a secret relationship with her. That is, you develop a deep emotional attachment to her while she has either indicated to you non-verbally that she just wants to be friends, or you have indicated to her inadvertently and non-verbally that you just want to be friends.

A lot of guys assume that a girl should get that he likes her just because he's nice to her and talks to her a lot, but girls generally don't make this assumption because, well, it's baseless and they're not psychic.

Next time you find yourself developing an attraction to a girl, you should really convey to her that you are interested in her at a point where she is at least somewhat acquainted with you and you wouldn't be devastated if she wasn't interested.

If she's not interested, leave the relationship on a positive note and look elsewhere. Do not plant yourself in the friend zone to have a secret relationship with her.

I agree with Chronos. It also doesn't sound like you really hate women, it just seems like you have been disappointed in love a few times and have seen some ugly marital dynamics within your own family. Hence, it may seem easier to write off the entire gender and say "Bah! I'm done with women!" But what is the alternative, really? Clearly, you like women, are attracted to them, and truly want a successful relationship with a woman.

One other note...please don't get sucked into the idea that only texting back and forth with a girl means that there is a love relationship there. Texting is fine, but in order for a love relationship to really be genuine, you MUST be in the same room at the same time, you MUST do things together, and there should be a steady progression of physical intimacy. Texts and emails are so appealing, especially to young men, because it "seems" like they're participating in a relationship and can leave it at that, but if you ask any girl, to be a boyfriend demands that the fellow show up, take her out, hold her hand, meet her parents and friends, etc., etc.

Finally, keep in mind that in the late teens, young women are just as inexperienced in handling romantic relationships as you are. They will make mistakes, hurt your feelings inadvertently, send mixed signals, play mean head games sometimes, and so on. Many of them are trying on behavior they've seen modeled by their mothers, sisters, and on television. That doesn't mean they know what they are doing! Also, realize that their hormones are going wild, but still aren't necessarily as strongly consuming as those of a 17-year-old young man, who generally, are the horniest people on earth! It's tough right now, but please don't give up on women, or on yourself. I sense that you truly want to be a great boyfriend for the RIGHT girl. Be patient and let these disappointments roll off your back. And don't be afraid to walk away when you sense a girl is doing the "let's just be friends" bit. There are SO many lonely girls who don't want a friend who's a boy, they want a boyfriend! I'm sure you will find her.

I happen to be a very nice person of the female gender. That said, I am twice your age! It takes time for girls to stop acticing silly and boy crazy and chasing thrills. You may find as you mature, you like older girls who are past this.

You sound a lot like me, in that you feel things so deeply. My Dad (way before we knew about AS) said that I feel things "like a hand with no skin". Very good analogy for me. My son, you remind me of, who is also AS, who is younger than you but described feelings of saddness such as when his "girlfriend" moved away in kindergarten. It is what it is to YOU. The intensity of your emotions may feel a curse to you now, but I feel they have served me well in live. I am a very caring, loving person b/c the pains of life hit me so deeply I am super aware not to hurt others.

You are young and deep, there is a girl for you in the right time. Please don't give up, or allow your intensity of emtions be funneled into hate rather than joy, love, peace. It is attainable in the worst of circumstances, I know from experience.

sometimes i feel the same way