Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

My boyfriend's mom is a moron

Page 1 of 1 [ 14 posts ] 

Previous topic | Next topic

meems
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Dec 2010
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,869

08 Jun 2011, 4:30 am

OK, not quite a moron but it's certainly difficult not to call her one. Months ago she was yelling and screaming at me and asked me if I thought she was stupid and I replied with a very honest YES, basically. She really wanted to hold that against me while she also wants to hold my asperger's against me whilst telling me not to use it as an excuse.

I will LIKELY never have to speak to her again and he's a grown man so he doesn't have any problems with that. He's been writing lately and he showed me some works she made revisions to, and in one bit he said something about people who were incapable of loving and she wrote in parenthesis "for example dating someone with aschbergers"

I wanted to throw up when I read it. She, at once, calls me capable of malice and spite and yet incapable of love.

It's hard not to mention she's a dumbass to him but I obviously won't be doing that... just... had to get this out.



Chummy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Dec 2010
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,343
Location: Location

08 Jun 2011, 7:24 am

Buy a pepper spray. Next time you bump into her she's toast.



Mindslave
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Nov 2010
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,034
Location: Where the wild things wish they were

08 Jun 2011, 9:45 am

Somehow the title of this thread makes me laugh.



Chronos
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Apr 2010
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,698

08 Jun 2011, 9:55 am

meems wrote:
OK, not quite a moron but it's certainly difficult not to call her one. Months ago she was yelling and screaming at me and asked me if I thought she was stupid and I replied with a very honest YES, basically. She really wanted to hold that against me while she also wants to hold my asperger's against me whilst telling me not to use it as an excuse.

I will LIKELY never have to speak to her again and he's a grown man so he doesn't have any problems with that. He's been writing lately and he showed me some works she made revisions to, and in one bit he said something about people who were incapable of loving and she wrote in parenthesis "for example dating someone with aschbergers"

I wanted to throw up when I read it. She, at once, calls me capable of malice and spite and yet incapable of love.

It's hard not to mention she's a dumbass to him but I obviously won't be doing that... just... had to get this out.


What exactly did you call your mother stupid over and what does any of this have to do with your mother's boyfriend?



superboyian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Sep 2009
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 14,704
Location: London

08 Jun 2011, 11:04 am

One of the things you certainly don't want to happen is conflicts when it comes to a relationship and the fact you honestly told her that she is stupid would obviously make her have that anger right there and if anyone was to say that to me, I'd probably most likely feel the same but then again, I can't really say too much about that... It shouldn't matter what she says at the end of the day, if you and your boyfriend are happy with each other then what other people say to you (even about the relationship) shouldn't matter to you.

You could try apologising to her, it might make things easier for you and your boyfriends mum, hopefully that's something?


_________________
BACK in London…. For now.
Follow my adventures on twitter: @superboyian
Please feel free to help my aspie friend become a pilot: https://gofund.me/a9ae45b4


Kaybee
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,446
Location: A hidden forest

08 Jun 2011, 11:27 am

superboyian wrote:
...the fact you honestly told her that she is stupid would obviously make her have that anger right there and if anyone was to say that to me, I'd probably most likely feel the same ...

If you don't want to be called stupid, you shouldn't ask people if they think you are.

I would suggest being reasonable if you have to speak with her about this again in the future. Tell her you're sorry for calling her stupid, but that she has judged you unfairly and you don't appreciate being discriminated against. I would not simply apologize and leave it at that--that would make you a pushover and make it seem acceptable for her to mistreat you.


_________________
"A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."


The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 43
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,426
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

08 Jun 2011, 11:34 am

In general...

Mom > gf.


Just keep that in mind.



Kaybee
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,446
Location: A hidden forest

08 Jun 2011, 11:43 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
In general...

Mom > gf.


Just keep that in mind.

For an adult? I wouldn't be so sure. I think it can really go either way, depending on the individuals involved.


_________________
"A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."


The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 43
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,426
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

08 Jun 2011, 12:05 pm

Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
In general...

Mom > gf.


Just keep that in mind.

For an adult? I wouldn't be so sure. I think it can really go either way, depending on the individuals involved.


She reviews his writings. *hint*



Kaybee
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,446
Location: A hidden forest

08 Jun 2011, 12:06 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
In general...

Mom > gf.


Just keep that in mind.

For an adult? I wouldn't be so sure. I think it can really go either way, depending on the individuals involved.

She reviews his writings. *hint*

Could be a hint, or it could just mean that he doesn't have anyone else to review them or has long been in the habit of her being the one to review them.


_________________
"A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."


The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 43
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,426
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

08 Jun 2011, 12:24 pm

Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
In general...

Mom > gf.


Just keep that in mind.

For an adult? I wouldn't be so sure. I think it can really go either way, depending on the individuals involved.

She reviews his writings. *hint*

Could be a hint, or it could just mean that he doesn't have anyone else to review them or has long been in the habit of her being the one to review them.


Besides, I said gf, not wife, not fianacée, also it depends how long they've been together.



Kaybee
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,446
Location: A hidden forest

08 Jun 2011, 12:35 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
In general...

Mom > gf.


Just keep that in mind.

For an adult? I wouldn't be so sure. I think it can really go either way, depending on the individuals involved.

She reviews his writings. *hint*

Could be a hint, or it could just mean that he doesn't have anyone else to review them or has long been in the habit of her being the one to review them.

Besides, I said gf, not wife, not fianacée, also it depends how long they've been together.

I don't know why you're arguing with me when I'm agreeing that you could be right. :? Again, it's possible that the mother comes before the girlfriend, and possible that she does not.


_________________
"A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."


The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 43
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,426
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

08 Jun 2011, 12:38 pm

Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
In general...

Mom > gf.


Just keep that in mind.

For an adult? I wouldn't be so sure. I think it can really go either way, depending on the individuals involved.

She reviews his writings. *hint*

Could be a hint, or it could just mean that he doesn't have anyone else to review them or has long been in the habit of her being the one to review them.

Besides, I said gf, not wife, not fianacée, also it depends how long they've been together.

I don't know why you're arguing with me when I'm agreeing that you could be right. :? Again, it's possible that the mother comes before the girlfriend, and possible that she does not.


Not arguing, just clarifying. Yet I love arguing, want to argue?



Kaybee
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Oct 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,446
Location: A hidden forest

08 Jun 2011, 12:44 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Kaybee wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
In general...

Mom > gf.


Just keep that in mind.

For an adult? I wouldn't be so sure. I think it can really go either way, depending on the individuals involved.

She reviews his writings. *hint*

Could be a hint, or it could just mean that he doesn't have anyone else to review them or has long been in the habit of her being the one to review them.

Besides, I said gf, not wife, not fianacée, also it depends how long they've been together.

I don't know why you're arguing with me when I'm agreeing that you could be right. :? Again, it's possible that the mother comes before the girlfriend, and possible that she does not.

Not arguing, just clarifying. Yet I love arguing, want to argue?

I get that impression. :P But I'm afraid you'd find attempting to argue with me unsatisfying. Unless you get me going on semantics.


_________________
"A flower falls, even though we love it; and a weed grows, even though we do not love it."