repetitive phrases! can you curb this behaviour, how?

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My son age 12yrs near 13 repeats phrases over and over, he has different diagnosis and different opinions. This makes it difficult to try and manage his needs, he has phrases he will repeat constantly, and develops new ones that can only last for a short period and he replaces them with different ones.

Its driving me crazy, he wants me to respond constantly/daily to the same thing over and over, I am not sure how to deal with this, if I respond and he likes or finds it funny he will want me to keep repeating it. If I try to ignore him he will get upset.

He is been assessed at the moment for OCD, which is probable. His diagnosis will be AS, ADHD & OCD. As I am really only finding out what he needs are which has taken 5 years of back and forth to services and I know I am not alone. You think you just understand and then there is another diagnosis.

If it is a trait of OCD how does one manage it or help my son to manage it?

Get him a cheap tape recorder at a thrift store and let him record and playback what ever he likes - with earphones. AS, ADHD and OCD can all be comorbids so you may need to do some investigative work to find out which one may be at the root of this particular behavior.

From what I understand, OCD is about ritual - having to repeat an action, etc over and over in order to quell an anxiety. If he suddenly likes the sounds of something and wants to hear it over and over, it sounds sort of like an AS trait - wanting to repeat those things he enjoys over and over. I'm not a doctor but my first instinct would be to research each condition, print myself a checklist and then start experimenting.

If it is an OCD issue, CBT can be useful to break the habit. If it is AS, it's a fairly harmless interest and should be able to be redirected into something less invasive into everyone elses space and, possibly into a larger interest on your son's part - like sound engineer!

My daughter also does this and it makes me crazy- and she knows it! I just indulge her in a few repetitions/responses and then I tell her that I'm all done saying it and that I don't have to respond again and if she wants to keep saying/asking it, fine, but I'm done. It 'usually' works. Sometimes...

Has he always done this or is it something new?
A lot of ASD people "script" which is repeating a phrase or a word that they have heard from somewhere else....TV or another person. Sometimes its used as a stim and sometimes it is used as fill in because communication is so difficult that there are times when you simply dont know what to say, so the script is used as a filler. I do this sometimes.
My brother, who is not diagnosed and not suspected by anyone other than me and my Mom, and is a high school history teacher and foot ball coach (too high functioning to be diagnosed) constantly quotes movies which IS scripting but its just generally accepted as his personality and he does not do it to an extent where it annoys other people. He is aware when it is appropriate and when it is not, most of the time.
I repeat sometimes the last thing people say to me or sometimes I have a part of a song that I repeat over and over. I mainly do this in my head because when I was little I was picked on and punished for doing this. In my case it is a verbal stim. Sometimes when Im alone I still do this out loud. I do not recommend teaching him the way I was, no one knew I had Asperger's when I was a kid so they just attempted to force me to appear normal which actually just screwed me up more. You maybe could try to explain to him that even though he likes these words or phrases sometimes it "hurts" you....you can maybe compare it to something that annoys him like if he has any auditory sensory issues. My son hates the sound of fabric being scratched or someone rubbing carpet with a broom or fingernails. So I tell him that the sound he is making (sometimes he makes this smacking sound with his lips that makes me want to vomit) makes me feel the way the scratching makes him feel. This way he understands and can empathize with how you feel. Try to encourage him to do the verbal stimming (if that is what it is) in his head more than out loud. Sometimes though you just need to do it out loud and he could do that in his room or whatever. Also try to reward him or let him know how much you appreciate it when he tries not to do this.

He has always been like that, but not to this extend, but it seems to be getting out of hand and its constant, in the car, at home, when we are out.

When I try to ignore he gets annoyed and keeps repeating mum answer me, say it. He will say a phrase and wants me to respond back with a answer that he has scripted. sometimes its from the tv other times he makes it up.

He does this to his Dad at times, but for me its constant or feels like that, like
robicslady said My daughter also does this and it makes me crazy- and she knows it! he knows it drives me crazy and he also likes this. Whilst I try not to get annoyed at times its impossible. He also has a hand shake with about 6 movements that he wants me to many times over the day and his dad also. This I dont mind so much, but can be inappropriate at times. He also does this to his Nan/uncle and he knows it upset her but he just keeps going even after I explained that she does not like it.

That sounds like OCD. Unless he gets cured I don't think he will stop this.

I would talk to him when he is not in repetitive mode and see if you resolve what his need is here. It sounds like somethhing he does to ease anxiety, in which case you learn to tolerate the game because that is better than having him meltdown. And you slowly working out alternatives, redirection strategies, etc.

My son and I worked out the following compromise on his need to talk which, granted, wasn't as strong as what you describe: I will not ask him to stop, and he will not require that I have given him my full attention.

My son does this, or used to. His was totally anxiety driven. He has ADHD, Anxiety Disorder (in the realm of OCD) and is an Aspie.
I think... lol... think that his need for repetition was driven by at least two factors.. boredom and a need for contact. He wanted to be social, but didn't have the tools to initiate and maintain a conversation, so he would resort to "Mom, I love you".. "I love you, Mom".. "Mom, You sure are great." "I love you"... "Gee Mom, You're the greatest." ... "I love you, Mom"... One time I counted nearly 30 such phrases in 5 minutes!.. It's great to hear your child say he loves you..... but OMG!! !! Then, if he said, "You're the greatest".. I was supposed to say, "No, you're the greatest." Which would turn into a "I love you 'this much' contest..."

To be honest, this behavior began escalating to the point of risking my sanity a little more than a year ago... We put him on anxiety meds.. and has nearly disappeared, or at least reduced to level that I can manage to satisfy for him. I know a lot of ppl are anti-meds.... So there are other things you can try, things I found a bit of success with. One of our biggest struggles was in the car. I found that if I held his hand and tried to initiate the conversation (which is hard for me, I'm not much of a conversationalist myself) things went better... or if I instigated a word association game, that helped some too. Currently, with the aid of meds, these tools help us almost completely control the situation. On rare occasions, this repetitiveness is more like a special interest monologue that can't be interrupted..... I still have no tool for that. (Advice?)

His other thing is repeating words or phrases and changing the intonation or inflection of the word or words... Like he is searching for the right sound... trying to make it perfect. In this situation, I just let him do his thing... He works it out and seems to get a personal satisfaction from it, much like he's trying on a new word and liking or disliking the fit of it. (Actually, it's a very interesting process to watch..)