I've Found Myself in a Terrible Mess

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Currently, (although considering the events of the past few days, I don’t think it’s going to last much longer) I’m in a polyamorous relationship. Recently, my boyfriend's other girlfriend lied to him and slept with someone else. He forgave her. Then she made plans behind his back to sleep with yet another guy. When he caught her, she lied to him repeatedly. He said he was done with her and was going to break up with her. Then yesterday he says he’s not breaking up with her, they’re just taking a break. She lied, cheated, and tried to lie to everyone in order to make him look like the bad guy. and he is ready to forgive her. I don’t think he’d forgive me if I did half the things she did. Actually, I know he wouldn’t forgive me.

So, I texted him and said that I didn't think his relationship with her was healthy, considering all I've seen and everything he's told me. He didn't reply. Now I have her texting me, saying "We aren't friends, Don't talk to me." Newsflash: I haven't exactly wanted to talk to you since you started being a psychopath, but that's beside the point. She thinks that my telling him to break up with her is a betrayal, and maybe it is, but I think it's justified. I think anyone would, given the information I had, say the same. Some people in our group of friends have said the same thing with even less information than I have. What's really bothering me is that, without even replying to me, he's giving her a play-by-play on everything I say. I guess I shouldn't have expected anything different at this point, but still. I don't know. I was just woken up after 2 hours of sleep with a flurry of texts building on the "We aren't friends. Don't talk to me." theme.

I am so freaking tired. I don't know what to do. I'm kind of dependent on him right now, as he's the only person who can drive me to my evening classes. If he's decided he doesn't want to see me anymore based on my being honest with him, (which is more than she's done) then I'm screwed.

Is there any kind of public transportation in California? If there is, your problems are solved.

Also, if it's a polyamorous relationship, why did he complain about her dating another guy? People make no sense.

Yeah. A bit hypocritical that he can have two women but she can't have two men. In fact 100% hypocritical.

I second the complete lack of understanding at polyamorous relationships. In theory they'd be lovely but in reality it seems to lead to a lot of unfairness and jealousy and odd conflict.

Just my humble opinion.

It wasn't that she was dating another guy, it was the fact that she lied about it. Repeatedly.

wmwrich, you can do better than both of them. Just leave them to it.

Wmwrich, get out of the relationship yourself. What he is doing is wrong and hypocritical. The girl is doing what he's doing but acting like a possessive stingy creep and guess what? He likes her more underneath it all because it's a challenge to him.

Find yourself someone who will just be with you or will have a real open relationship. Those two are crazy makers.

Why would someone with social difficulties want to deal with more people than they need to?

In the future, I would stick to monogamous relationships.