are gay leaders more intolerant ?

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This is probably not the forum to come and find too much institutional support for what passes for the "gay community" in contemporary culture.

A great deal of the gay communities core institutions for the last 40 years have been built around socialization--and it stands to reason. We are, after all, a population that is defined by the sexuality of its members, and sexual behaviour is inherently social. (You can do it on your own, but for a lot of people, that still involves conjuring other people in your head, or on your computer screen....)

Because we (the Aspie "we", not the gay "we") are defined primarily by our social deficits, it stands to reason that we are going to find little common ground with people who have emerged from a community built around socialization.

But it cannot be repeated too often: the institutional "gay community" is only the tip of the iceberg of the larger gay community. Those of us who are working away in our careers, living in our homes (whether it be condos downtown or houses in the suburbs), socializing with our circles of friends (rather than our circuit friends) form a substantially larger number within the totality of LGBT people in our communities.

So, the challenge for us--those of us who are GLBT but who do not move within the core institutions--is to create networks of our own, and find leaders of our own with the community.

Maybe heterosexual blokes would be less inclined to ban somebody out of fear because they would be less inclined to admit to being afraid or unable to control the situation. That's my personal instant opinion.

Are gay leaders more intolerant? They certainly ARE. My experience here in Australia is that they are very up themselves, & if you don't "sound" & "act" like the stereotype sissy/camp guy, you're not wanted! It's totally impossible for gay guys who go bald in their early 20s.

I do not think LGBT leaders are any more or less intolerant, but certainly some of the groups I've been a part of have been extremely cliqueish and depressing, especially when trans or bi folks were treated as objects of derision.On the other hand, sometimes I go to LGBT religious services and the I've met two Aspie-ish guys there. They seem to be the only ones who bother to talk to me after service.