Hi; curious about ASDs

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Hi there,

I came across this forum several times when I was browsing sites about Asperger's, which I've become curious about lately. I glanced at some of the threads; they seemed to be a lot more informative than many of the articles I've found. The name "Wrong Planet" seemed to echo my mindset, too. Heh.

I had read a little bit about Asperger's, and many things seemed to fit. (From my understanding, learning to speak at an early age precludes me from autism, but not from Asperger's).

The things that made me wonder:
-Having absolute pitch (found out about it recently)
-Inability to make friends during my childhood/teen years (I got bullied pretty badly for this)
-Inability to tolerate certain sounds (they give me a very strong feeling of rage)
-Stronger sense of smell/taste/touch
-Constantly being approached by creepy older men who are old enough to be my father or grandfather (I've read that this tends to happen to women with ASDs, but I'm not sure why or how, because they're not the ones initiating it)
-Being told that I seem callous sometimes (I'm usually not aware of it)
...etc. Too many to list.

I've been very depressed for a while because I feel that I cannot connect to people. I feel as though every social grace I've finally mastered is artificial (e.g. if I hear that I someone whom I care for is going through a rough time, I feel for him/her, but any way I express my sympathy feels wrong and fake to me). I only consider three people to be close friends, and I don't know how to explain this to any of them, because I don't want to make them feel uncomfortable. There are some people whom I don't like to spend time with, because they seem too image-obsessed and narcissistic for my tastes in company, but I don't know how to politely avoid the ones who want to get to know me. (It usually ends badly, too, when they do something terrible, or when I lose my patience.) I also have no idea as to how to make friends with the people who do seem kind and interesting to me, partly because I've never been comfortable as part of a group. It's like... I want to get to know that person, but I'm not thrilled about being introduced to his or her friends.

I'm wary of self-diagnosing, because I'm afraid of falling victim to confirmation bias (I mean no offense towards the other self-diagnosed members-- just speaking for myself, here). I'm curious as to how a clinical diagnosis is made, but not too concerned with getting an evaluation. I think that my own specific issues can be identified and resolved with or without a diagnosis. But, in any case, ASDs sound interesting to me, and I want to get a better understanding of them and the people who have them. I hope to learn more, maybe help other members with their own difficulties, and make some friends here. =)

Sorry for the lengthy downer of an introduction. It just kinda came out... e__e

About me: I'm twenty-one years old, Californian, Asian-American. I love classic heavy metal, animals, and science fiction.

from a "creepy older man" -
welcome to this thing of ours

So, where are you from?

i live in the wilds of mason county, washington [roughly 3 hours drive SW from seattle]. how 'bout yourself?

if you had my xenophobic yahoo neighbors, you would not be jealous. the trees here are greener even than your smog used to be long ago, but the grass is NOT greener on this side of the country. our local district attorney said due to state budget cuts, it was up to each mason county citizen to arm himself and protect his own life and property, there would not be enough mason county law enforcement officers left on the job to do more than a cursory check of the county. but i noticed there are more than enough of 'em to hide in every nook and cranny to ticket poor slobs for speeding. priorities, priorities...

i live so far out in the sticks that there is barely any DTV reception out here. i can't afford cable so i had to have a treemonkey climb atop a 90' tree to erect a "deep fringe" "flyswatter" digital tv antenna just so i could get basic broadcast channels. i live 51 miles from the nearest tv transmitter tower. under the old analog system that would not be too far, but for the new digital system the fcc shoved down our collective throats, it is on the ragged edge of reception. i got no signal when i tried the antenna atop my roof.

it takes me 40 minutes to drive to the nearest semblence of civilization, a little town called shelton, which is barely more than a wide spot in the road. olympia [state capital] is another hour from there. if one doesn't have a car out here, they are mostly SOL. there is a local "general" store with exorbitantly overpriced staple items such as canned food, rat poison and such. if i want to see a movie [haven't seen one since 2000] i have to drive into town which for me isn't worth the trip, gas costing what it does now. there are no cultural amenities out here, no museums, no theatres, no nothing but trees and none-too-friendly country folk. "good fences make for good neighbors."

i live in the reddest of red counties, which sticks out like a sore thumb in blue western washington. i hear gunshots day and night, there is widespread game poaching out here. the local DA said it is every citizen's duty to wear traffic-cone orange while nature walking out in the woods, because they can't make the local hunters be careful enough to not shoot until they can see it is a human and not a deer. people who ride bicycles [like moi] are looked upon with barely disguised loathing, by the bulk of drivers out here, like "how dare we take our blue state freakiness out in public?" men with long hair are similarly looked-at askance. you'd think it was still 1955 out here. i hate it here, and would trade places with you in an eyeblink, if i could afford to live in civilization, which is the only advantageous point to where i live, the cost of living/housing is cheap out here. i couldn't afford to move anyplace else. oh well, i suppose i've ranted enough for now. thanx for patiently listening to me

Welcome to WrongPlanet, schnapps!

I was depressed not too long ago, but that has gone but I still never feel I can connect to people, so you are not alone in feeling alone, so to speak!

Hope you enjoy your stay here

Welcome to WP!

Welkome to WrongPlanet.

The WP Kink

To WrongPlanet!! !