What do you need from a partner?

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TeaEarlGreyHot
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06 Aug 2011, 4:32 pm

No... not what you want. What do you need?


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curlyfry
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06 Aug 2011, 4:47 pm

Understanding



TeaEarlGreyHot
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06 Aug 2011, 4:50 pm

curlyfry wrote:
Understanding


That's a pretty simple list.

Me... I think I need too much. Understanding is at the core of it all, but the specific things just aren't doable for 99% of people.


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Grisha
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06 Aug 2011, 4:51 pm

Not sure what "need" actually means - I see it as only varying degrees of "want"

You "need" air, you "want" sex (for example)

If "needed" a partner I'd have been dead a long time ago... :wink:



blitzkrieg
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06 Aug 2011, 4:52 pm

Grisha wrote:
Not sure what "need" actually means - I see it as only varying degrees of "want"

You "need" air, you "want" sex (for example)

If "needed" a partner I'd have been dead a long time ago... :wink:


Oh you.



TeaEarlGreyHot
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06 Aug 2011, 4:53 pm

Grisha wrote:
Not sure what "need" actually means - I see it as only varying degrees of "want"

You "need" air, you "want" sex (for example)

If "needed" a partner I'd have been dead a long time ago... :wink:


:lol:

Obviously, a partner itself is a want. In order to achieve that, we must first understand what we would need from them. (and what we can give but that's for another thread)

So Grisha... what would you need in order to have a partner?


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hale_bopp
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06 Aug 2011, 4:54 pm

Affection, understanding and mutual respect I guess. Otherwise what's the point?



curlyfry
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06 Aug 2011, 5:05 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
curlyfry wrote:
Understanding


That's a pretty simple list.

Me... I think I need too much. Understanding is at the core of it all, but the specific things just aren't doable for 99% of people.


Well I figured if we can't have wants...What's left to keep us remaining civil.

On a positive note. If I was able to find this site and know that I am not so unique. There's a possibility that I might also find a male counter part with similar characteristics.



Last edited by curlyfry on 06 Aug 2011, 5:33 pm, edited 3 times in total.

TeaEarlGreyHot
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06 Aug 2011, 5:07 pm

curlyfry wrote:
TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
curlyfry wrote:
Understanding


That's a pretty simple list.

Me... I think I need too much. Understanding is at the core of it all, but the specific things just aren't doable for 99% of people.


Well I figured if we can have wants...What's left to keep us remaining civil.


Please explain.


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Masato
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06 Aug 2011, 5:07 pm

Understanding, affection, mutual respect, trust, a lot of love and a kiss in the evening before going to bed. :)



curlyfry
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06 Aug 2011, 5:13 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
curlyfry wrote:
TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
curlyfry wrote:
Understanding


That's a pretty simple list.

Me... I think I need too much. Understanding is at the core of it all, but the specific things just aren't doable for 99% of people.


Well I figured if we can have wants...What's left to keep us remaining civil.


Please explain.


(Sorry about the typo) ...if we can't have wants

Understanding as in tolerance for each others characteristics.



hurtloam
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06 Aug 2011, 5:16 pm

Grisha wrote:
Not sure what "need" actually means - I see it as only varying degrees of "want"

You "need" air, you "want" sex (for example)

If "needed" a partner I'd have been dead a long time ago... :wink:



Oh, i like this comment, if love is a need i should have died a long time ago.

But seriously i need someone who can support me emotionally. I have a couple of friends who do this for me, but they are in relationships and i feel i shouldn't lean on them too much because that isn't fair. They have their own girlfriends, it makes me feel like i'm having emotional affairs. I need a guy of my own to talk to about stuff, someone who can comfort me, someone who can reason with me and make me see sense when i am swept up in uncontrolable emotions.

I need someone who i can comfortably share my life with someone with similar values, but i also need someone with their own strong point of view who can challenge me and discuss interesting things with me or i will feel unfulfilled. I need someone i can trust and whom i respect.

I need someone physical, i need hugs, to put it mildly. I can't be with someone who doesn't like touch. Although i come across as someone who doesn't like touch so no one knows thats what i really want from a guy.

I need someone kind and caring and willing to listen. I need someone who doesn't judge me. I need someone who likes me, loves me back. Someone who i enjoy being around, someone who makes me laugh. Someone quirky. I have all this in a friend of mine, but he's taken. I need someone of my very own.



Masato
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06 Aug 2011, 5:19 pm

And if love wasn't 'needed', you wouldn't even been born in the first place..



TeaEarlGreyHot
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06 Aug 2011, 5:21 pm

Masato wrote:
And if love wasn't 'needed', you wouldn't even been born in the first place. Sex with total strangers who get children together is so boring, don't you agree?


No, love isn't a need though it fills something nothing else can.


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Masato
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06 Aug 2011, 5:23 pm

TeaEarlGreyHot wrote:
Masato wrote:
And if love wasn't 'needed', you wouldn't even been born in the first place. Sex with total strangers who get children together is so boring, don't you agree?


No, love isn't a need though it fills something nothing else can.

Maybe not, but I guess that most of our parents where in love when they got us, don't you think? If that wasn't the case, then we would never exist.