My mom doesn't like me being a loner

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She seems to despise me wanting to fly RC planes as says it's a loner hobby. I don't get it, I'm happy with my solitude.

That's perfectly fine, but its nice to have some friends too. awesome friends. Like me.

I don't want any friends, I am incapable of sustaining friendships, and I hate everyone. Despite this, my mother still wants me to go outside, do things, and make friends.

I have noticed that NT's seem to have the attitude that if you are not like them, you are somehow defective and in need of repair. Don't let it get to you. She just doesn't know any better.

I have the same sort of problem with my mother she gets depressed because she thinks its her fault that she raised me wrong that lead to me having no friends. No matter how many times through school and now in my adult life I keep repeating that its the autism she still says Im not normal and I should change because I would be happier with friends. She cant grasp that talking to people and socialising in noisy places makes me nervous and uncomfortable cos I cant think of what to say. Yes sometimes I would like to have a friend I could talk to about important events in my life but other than that Im happy alone.

My opinion is if you are happy then you dont need to try to change for someone elses benefit. As for the RC planes, where I live in the UK I believe there are clubs and trade fairs that people could go to and speak to other people about their planes and buy parts etc. You might find joining an RC plane club easier than trying to start conversations with people you have nothing in common with and the people at the club might become your friends.

There is a whole RC plane club about 5 minutes down the road from me. Has to be 20 to 30 people flying planes down in the field. It is kind of fun to watch.

I know what you mean. Sometimes I feel like I'm better off staying at home and working on my novel. It's so much easier on me to just be alone. However, I've found that when I'm a loner all the time I start to be less happy. I think we really need to find a balance, to be a loner at times and to be social at others. It's not easy, but it's what makes me happy, so I'm making an extra effort to be as social as I can be whenever I can. I still have my alone time to write and watch cartoons, but I also have friends should I ever need them.

You never know when you will need outside people. So I would try to keep a network of acquaintances at least or friends if it turns out to be that way. I wouldn't push trying to get a friend. Let it happen more naturally, don't rush it.

Easier is not always better, and your moms are right. They are looking out for your future, because they will not be around forever. You will have to take risks and make mistakes. You don't have to do so much at once, but try to do something. Heck aim for one risk/mistake a day, but try to learn from it. Don't just do something for the sake of something randomly bad to happen. Do it because you know it might be good for your livelihood and survival.

my mom seems like the complete opposite. she really doesn't say a word to me at all.

My parents never helped me form relationships as a child, effectively destroyed any capability I had. They didn't care about my well-being, so didn't tell me anything about friendships.

I was once happy alone, playing video games (although technically I wasn't always alone - this was when I had to go to school in the morning, at least). Today, since I have more opportunity to be alone than not (as mandatory education ended) I do feel depressed at times, not because I cannot rekindle that happiness I once felt in solitude (or can I?) but due to my thinking for long periods I end up clearly seeing this projected path towards death. It's all alone, dead, and as such it ends up scaring me, while alive...

I see... At least my social skills were hosue-trained...

Maybe I should fly a micro RC plane in the classroom and see what happens!

You could be like me and pretend to have friends just so that she will shut up.

It reminds me of the opposite situation I experienced a few times. A lone "normal" person amongst a group of people with AS. The person was constantly being argued with and had absolutely no idea the right way to treat anyone in the group. I just watched in amusement when I realized what was happening. That day, the "normal" person got worn out socializing, and the rest of us recharged our batteries.
It was especially amusing and somewhat satisfying because that person tends to be the life of the party among groups of people.

My grandma is always telling me to go to big group events with her. She's never happy unless she's around a ton of people. She thinks I'm lonely in my room and that she's doing me a favor by inviting me. When she hears me talking on and on about my special interests, she gets really upset and says that no one should ever think about those sorts of things.

My dad may have AS as well so we understand each other pretty well. Although grandma thinks it's such a travesty.