Unable to find a niche.

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Hi,

I am in my early forties and I it seems like I can't really find a niche anywhere. I do have some interests but apparently I can't connect with other people through them. I like things such as reading and going to plays and I do some volunteer work assisting in an office at a nonprofit organization. I go to church but everyone else just leaves after the service and gets in their cars and drives home and that's it. People tell me I have to find people I have things in common with but I don't seem to have anything in common with other people. I guess I am looking for something that I can belong to and be a part of and I just can't seem to find it. Does anyone else feel like they don't have a niche or have you found ways to find a niche? I feel out of place everywhere I go.

I feel the same way you do! I wish I could give you advice but nothing has worked for me yet so I am interested in seeing replies to this. I have a hard time even finding interests though.

That's me as well. No matter how hard I try I just can't seem to fit in with people...even if we share interests. I've forced myself to go to clubs at school and every single time I all but run to get out of the room. Its so painfully awkward to try and get involved in any kind of group

In the classroom, I tend to attract students during the semester, but they're only interesting in getting homework help. I'm trying to understand just what about my personality is so abrasive, but I can't figure it out. After all, I seem perfectly normal to myself. I feel hopeless. Sorry I can't offer any advice either, but I can tell you that you're not alone in feeling alienated.

Like everyone else, I definately feel the same way as you. It is a symptom with asperger's though to be unable or find it extremely challenging to relate to others even if you share the same interests. And that's one of my biggest problems too... I can't seem to find my niche in society or relate to my peers. I am usually very good at faking it but it takes alot of energy socially and can only go so far. I am also good at the introduction side of things and I do attract people that way. But then once we get passed that I am completely lost...

Do you like art? I find that art class is a good place to connect with people. Sitting around painting a picture is good for talking with people without the pressure of having to talk or keep up with the conversation. The people attending art classes tend to be more friendly open-minded types. The best classroom arrangement is to have people sitting at large tables across from and next to each other, and the teacher just walks around looking at the works-in-progress without taking the art too seriously. It's more like no-pressure socializing over art.