If Autism is a ''good thing'', why do most have anger?

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I've read up a lot of case studies and articles and books explaining the view from a typical Aspie adult, and most have mentioned that they're angry or have some form of aggression inside them. If most Aspies (like on WP) seem to embrace their Autism and say how good it is and convince Autism-haters like myself to embrace my condition, then how come a lot of us seem to have a lot of anger or other negative emotions inside us? What are we so angry about? Does everybody with Autism really hate it deep inside, but can learn to think positive about it in every way? Are most Autistics not being honest with themselves? I put myself down a lot, because I'm just being honest with myself, but it still doesn't seem to stop me from being angry. I would have thought by admitting what a screwup and how insecure I am, I thought I wouldn't be so angry. But I seem to have a lot of aggression inside, and I can't make out where it's coming from.

Just wondering why a lot of Aspies and Autistics have mentioned that they're quick to lose their temper and get aggression build up inside them, but still love their Autism at the same time as though it's a good thing, even though people might say, ''well why doesn't it feel like a good thing if you act so angry with yourself all the time?''

Just curious.

I think it has a lot to do with enviromental and social factors, I am pretty sure even an NT who had to and still has to deal with all the crap I do probably would not be too happy with their life either.

I'm not agressive, I rarely get angry with people. I don't experience bad emotions 24/7. I'm happy, chilled and content most of the time. I think its kinda unfair assuming all aspies have anger problems or depression.

Yes, I agree.

My own anger accumulated inside me over many years of feeling like some kind of societal orphan or outcast, and that began in the first grade of school. However, my anger had only stemmed from the frustration of feeling like some kind of societal orphan or outcast and has never been directed toward my AS/HFA.

Anger is a normal human emotion, and NT's feel it too.

I seem to show various signs of being NT-ish, emotionally anyway, and I personally know that when I have difficulties with other people, I get angry at myself because I believe that "I'm" at least partially responsible for that difficulty but I also get angry at "them" because they just aren't that accepting/understanding. Anyway, to summarize, I think most people on the boards who are angry, they're angry at 1) themselves 2) others and 3) life in general.

I tended to have worse anger issues when I was younger, but it was actually more of a sensory overload issue than actual anger. People with Asperger's and especially autism tend to get their circuits overloaded, perhaps not more easily but with everything they go through more often than people without AS/ASD. Because of this, what is typically uncommon for people w/o AS/ASD is more common for people with it, explosive outbursts. However, take someone w/o AS/ASD and put them into an overloading situation over a really long period of time, and yes, they will have explosive outbursts like any human being would. Its just that people with AS/ASD deal with more.

I'm aggressive I'm not going to lie.

Autism isn't necessarily a great gift to me, if I was born NT I wouldn't want autism. I have very low self esteem because of my severe learning disabilities, and memory problems. Between being misunderstood by other people all the time, and being incapacitated at doing things normal things other people have no issues with I'm extremely mentally tormented. I have put holes in my wall because no one was ever kind enough to see my side or understand how difficult my life is. I grew up feeling worthless and suicidal because teachers called me lazy and I was trying harder than any other student. When I did start learning better people told me I was cured of my problems but that's far from true I still seem to have to work 150%times harder only to have family members tell me I'm a lazy worthless person with the coping skills of an infant. Now adding insult to injury, mental health resources have been neglecting me since early childhood. I have to fight people for supports I need just to survive without losing all sense of dignity in the process. When dying seems more dignifying than being alive how could someone not be a raging blunt, cynical, pessimistic train wreck.

Yeah, I hate most of NTs, because most of them can't... no, because most of them don't want to understand. Even when I was doing my best, I was just humiliated by them.
Even on Internet, all my teams/guilds etc..., they never tried to understand, they always blemed me for some things that I just don't understand instead of help me.


It doesn't mean I hate everyone, but yeah, I hate a lot of NTs. They caused depressions, low self-esteem, and a lot of other things I didn't deserved, just because of my difference. How can I love them ? But ! I'm happy to be an Aspie. I couldn't live as a NT. I simply hate a lot of NTs.

sMeow.

For me, anger usually comes from sensory overload, but it's also been sparked from frustration over not being heard or being taken seriously when I need to be. At this point in life, I rarely act out. Sometimes I withdraw and never return to the person(s) or situation.

From what I have read around these forums and on Aspies For Freedom, I've noticed that most of the general anger with those of us on the spectrum comes from not being able to "function normally" without massive amounts of unneeded stress. Also, for those of us who were diagnosed late (I was diagnosed at 17, too late to be of any help in school as I graduated 3 months later), or those who were ignored when we asked for help when we were young because we were "just lazy" or "didn't want to do the work assigned," a lot of anger comes from those experiences. I for one am still angry that my school didn't do anything when my parents tried to get me evaluated when I was in 3rd grade; the school actually said I was too smart to have any "mental disabilities" and wouldn't recommend me for evaluation (I was reading at a 7th grade level - 4 years ahead of my classmates!). I was also treated badly by my "peers" who saw me as a freak and a social outcast, so there is a lot of hurt from all of that left behind (I was verbally and sometimes physically abused by my classmates, often in front of teachers who did nothing).

There is a lot of anger that can build up because of things like this, as well as not-often-realized-at-the-time slights when we are older. Because we Aspies tend to have very good long-term memory banks, the bad often gets remembered more than the good, and that often contributes to a buildup of anger, depression, and/or hate. I won't lie, I believe that there are a lot of us who have a ridiculous amount of anger at the world, at ourselves and at others for not understanding us. I try not to let the anger I have get in my way of living my life as I want to. I was told that I would never amount to anything by a teacher back in the 4th grade; now, I am finishing my Associates degree at my local community college, and applying for transfer to a four-year public university for a Bachelor's in Zoology; I plan to eventually become the Head Zookeeper at one of the several nationally renowned Zoos in the US.

To me, Autism really is a good thing. Without the focus it provides, I wouldn't have been able to make it through several courses that I dislike in college; without my "obsessions" I wouldn't have found a career I love already (I adore animals, particularly big cats, such as Tigers and the many subspecies of Leopards, and wolves); and without my stubbornness, I wouldn't have such a supporting group of friends, including my family and my boyfriend of 3 years. I also will not lie, I do have a lot of anger built up and I have severe depression and PTSD from being treated the way I was by peers and teachers throughout school, but I use that anger to fuel my forward drive; I WILL achieve everything I set out to do, because I WILL NOT let that depression and those memories, hold me down.

I get angry when there is a lot of noise or if something doesn't go how I planned it to. I usually try to keep the anger confined to my own head, because a 20 year old girl doesn't need to be having tantrums that make her look like a toddler.

Eh? Where did you read this? According to the National Autistic Society literature (and just about everything else I've ever read) aspies exhibit a triad of impairments: social interaction, social communication and social imagination. I have read the anxiety and depression are frequent co-morbidities but I've never seen anything that says that aspies are angrier or more aggressive than any other group.

For a scientific comparison we would need to put NTs in an environment where they do not fit, and cannot make themselves understood, even after many years. Perhaps they would be even more angry?

They're more emotional and have a higher desire to "fit in", so they probably would.

I don't think I get angry nearly as often or as strongly as NTs I know. I tend to let things blow past me, which would ire NTs. I don't care if someone says my mother looks like a buffalo, or childish stuff like that. I just feel sorry for the person of limited intelligence who had to resort to saying something like that in an effort to get a point across.

As far as internal anger, I would guess that it could be more severe in Aspies, but ONLY if the Aspie has been brought up in a family where he/she feels like there's some blame placed on self by others for being different or weird.

Charles