AS traits in father inherited by son?

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I've been with my kids' father for almost 11 years. Last week, my 7 year old son's doc asked to test him for AS. After the appt, I started researching. Oddly enough, I've found that some of the traits exhibited by our son are also visible in his father. My fiancé says our son is fine, just a lot like him. He said the other night that J is like a rolled up version of him; he has all the issues he has had in the past 30 yrs. Is AS hereditary?

Both of my guys are sweet as can be. They both have tempers, although dad tries to hide his. Neither of them make good eye contact most of the time. They both have OCD traits. They both have ADHD. Neither of them are good at serious conversation and avoid it whenever possible. They both have little respect for authority or being told what they should do. Neither of them show signs of guilt when doing something wrong & they don't seem to understand why I get upset. Dad even smiles and laughs when I am trying to let him know he's hurt me or angered me.

I'm so confused.

I think the father son link is pretty common. When my son was diagnosed, both doctors concluded that I most likely have it.
My father had some traits, as did his father.
My son has no problem with serious conversation, but when he starts talking about physics or the inner workings of some robot project he is working on, it doesn't go over well with the other 7 year olds.
Working with my son has helped me understand myself much better.

Many adults self identify as having AS when an offspring is diagnosed and they learn about the characteristics of individuals on the spectrum.

Conversely, often, an undiagnosed parent with AS refuses to admit there's anything unusual about their child who has been diagnosed. It's an understandable denial.

Don't be confused by your husband, it is what is, and you know it.

I feel like I'm going crazy, here. I know what I see, what I've been seeing for years. My baby is "normal" in some aspects, but definitely not in others. He has a hard time in social situations, like football this past season. He had meltdowns at almost every game and a majority of the practices. He is constantly wearing a frumpy face whenever I correct anything he does & never seems to understand why I'm upset (other than repeating what I've just told him about his behavior). He doesn't like to talk unless he's leading the conversation or it's something he's interested in. He hates talking on the phone & will constantly place the phone above his ears so that it's not blaring. Even then, he only stays on the phone for a few seconds. He won't look me in the eyes but for a few seconds at a time. He has friends but is constantly fighting w/ them, saying they don't like him. He's always lined things up in lines or ordered them in size, but his room is a disaster area when I don't make him clean. Hes either completely organized or not at all. He won't leave the sheets on his bed, at all. He doesn't like loud noises & will get upset over them.

Sorry to go on & on. I just really wish things were easier.

I think so. You will find that most people on this board believe that ASD's are hereditary.

You son plays football? Does he enjoy it? Many people with ASD's are not so interested in sports.

As you learn more about AS, you will likely discover ways for some things to be a bit easier. For example; eye contact. For AS folks, avoiding eye contact is not meant to be disrespectful, nor is it used to evade. Eye contact distracts them from what you're saying; they need to look away to get your meaning.

Right there's an area that can be less troublesome for you. As you stop correcting you son about eye contact and understand that he's doing it to enable listening; bingo, less stress for you both. This is just one example of how your new-found awareness of AS can be helpful. You don't need your husband to agree in order for your new knowledge to be useful for you and your son.

This was his first year playing football. He played great, when he wasn't freaking out. He picked 2 kids that he really bonded with, one of which is autistic & the other is overly shy & quiet. Both of them are much younger than him. It was pretty stressful for him, really. He would lose it when he got confused (like if they were putting them into position & didn't tell him what he was doing). He lost it if he missed a catch or someone touched him. He flipped out during multiple games because someone on the other team touched him, which is normal in football!

I thought maybe baseball would be easier for him. I want him to be part of social stuff, but I feel as though he's not stable enough.

when my nephew was diagnosed with AS, i looked for descriptions and found them on webmd.com and aarp.org. i thought they described me and my dad, too.. i took the test based on the DSM at www.iautistic.com/test_AS.php . i came out positive for AS.

i prefer serious conversations to small talk and have never laughed at someone when they explained how i hurt them. are you sure they're not laughing to cover embarassment?

i don't have ADHD or OCD.

I've been dealing w/ the eye contact thing w/ his dad forever. He will look at me sometimes, but not when the conversation is important. It's highly annoying! I suppose now that I have some insight, it may make things easier though.

My son doesn't laugh when I'm talking to him, unless I laugh. My hubby is the one that laughs. I'm not sure why he does it, but it makes me want to rip my hair out.
I know my son is a lot like my hubby! I'm not sure on the diagnosis as we don't have one for AS at the moment. What I do know is that they are both quirk-filled & I love them. I just want to understand them.

It was only after it became apparent that my daughter had an ASD, that I realised that I probably fit the bill too. My husband has traits as well, but copes much better than I do. He has social skills deficits (probably worse than mine), but he doesn't let it bother him, whereas I worry about such things. My sensory issues are much more clear than his. MY FIL and BIL have quite obvious AS. Our daughter appears to have inherited traits from both sides of the family. The ADHD-like traits she has are definitely from me.

altho the exact cause of autism hasnt been identified, it is known that there is a genetic factor at play. autism often runs in families, having one autistic child increases the odds of having another autistic child, and having an autistic parent increases the odds that a child or children born to that parent will be autistic. so yes, it can be hereditary.

my youngest son's diagnosis was delayed in large part due to us just attributing his autistic traits to inheritance from his father. K talked late, well his dad did, too, so its ok. K didnt smile hardly at all as a baby, well his dad has a serious demeanor also, he just got it from his dad. K didnt answer to his name, didnt play with other kids, showed repetitive motor movements, but hey his dad does all those things so hes just like his dad. well DUH =) thats because his dad is autistic, too. my SO was officially diagnosed with classic autism 9 months after our youngest got his diagnosis.

one often misunderstood trait of autism is a difficulty with showing emotion in the typical manner. often its said autistics dont show emotion, which is very wrong, they just do so in their own way, like so many other things they do. its not uncommon for them to laugh at inappropriate times, my son has this issue and laughs when hes in trouble. its a spontaneous showing of emotion, and not something they can always control. my 5 yr old put it best when he said to me, "sometimes i laugh when i dont want to."

welcome to the wonderful world of autism, rissa =) its a wild ride.

I'm still unsure whether he has it or not as we're waiting for a diagnosis. All I know is that my lil man isn't your typical 7 year old in some aspects. Yes, he can go outdoors & play with his sister and a few select friends. He often chooses younger children or girls to play with though. He laughs, a lot. He can talk well, but sometimes has a hard time explaining things. He loves to draw, do puzzles, color & play computer games. He cries over the smallest things, which often turn into full-blown tantrums. He gets frustrated so easily.

For all I know, my baby could just be a moody kid, but I have a feeling there's way more to it.

Yes, I would say the same. I was consciously aware of being different than most other people even prior to puberty, and I have spent a great deal of time trying to figure that out and find an understanding myself over these past 50 years.

With or without a diagnosis, just see your son as he is and help him learn to deal with life on life's terms.

That's what I'm trying to do.