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Grisha
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20 Nov 2011, 7:57 am

I had my daughter take a photo of me yesterday looking like I "naturally" look in everyday settings and I was actually kind of shocked at what I saw. I really looked sad/depressed even though I actually was rather neutral at that point.

I know that a flat/blunted affect can be a characteristic of people on the spectrum, but it seems to be niether mandatory nor even common - I'm beginning to wonder if it has nothing to do with my AS and may simply be "just me".

Is this something that people around here have a problem with? Does anyone have any suggestions to help me fix it?

It's really bothering me, a lot.

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Aimless
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20 Nov 2011, 8:07 am

Grisha wrote:
I had my daughter take a photo of me yesterday looking like I "naturally" look in everyday settings and I was actually kind of shocked at what I saw. I really looked sad/depressed even though I actually was rather neutral at that point.

I know that a flat/blunted affect can be a characteristic of people on the spectrum, but it seems to be niether mandatory nor even common - I'm beginning to wonder if it has nothing to do with my AS and may simply be "just me".

Is this something that people around here have a problem with? Does anyone have any suggestions to help me fix it?

It's really bothering me, a lot.

Image

Oh dear, that is exactly my neutral facial expression. Something a bit like Herman Munster. The only thing I can thing of is to think about your face constantly, and who wants to do that? But you are a nice looking man nonetheless.


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abaisse
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20 Nov 2011, 8:10 am

When people take pictures, I'm very mindful to smile. I do smile, laugh, etc.. without a camera. However, my "neutral" face apparent looks upset. I can sit somewhere completely indifferent and people will often ask "Are you okay?"

I'm usually okay. It's just me....

I also try to be mindful about how I express myself during gift giving. If I love a gift because of the sentimental meaning, I will smile. If it's just a practical gift that I like (and possibly even asked for), I can remain neutral and neutral looks upset. I've offended several with this. :?



Grisha
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20 Nov 2011, 8:13 am

Aimless wrote:
The only thing I can thing of is to think about your face constantly, and who wants to do that?


I do! If that's what it takes to fix it...

Maybe practice in front of a mirror/webcam and "hold" it in position for a certain amount of time each day?



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20 Nov 2011, 8:18 am

Grisha wrote:
Aimless wrote:
The only thing I can thing of is to think about your face constantly, and who wants to do that?


I do! If that's what it takes to fix it...

Maybe practice in front of a mirror/webcam and "hold" it in position for a certain amount of time each day?

I've actually thought about doing that but I am easily distracted.


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Grisha
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20 Nov 2011, 8:19 am

abaisse wrote:
When people take pictures, I'm very mindful to smile. I do smile, laugh, etc.. without a camera. However, my "neutral" face apparent looks upset. I can sit somewhere completely indifferent and people will often ask "Are you okay?"

I'm usually okay. It's just me....

I also try to be mindful about how I express myself during gift giving. If I love a gift because of the sentimental meaning, I will smile. If it's just a practical gift that I like (and possibly even asked for), I can remain neutral and neutral looks upset. I've offended several with this. :?


Reminds me of this:

(Nice to see you posting again BTW :))

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CosmicRuss
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20 Nov 2011, 9:56 am

I have had endless strangers pass comment on my facial expression too, the usual "cheer up", "who has died ?" etc. I now have a Tuo Viso facial toner machine which I use now and again but try every day when brushing my teeth to do facial exercises too.
This video is quite educational [the lipstick is optional].
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOTWhm6khc[/youtube]



deconstruction
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20 Nov 2011, 9:58 am

I'm bad at reading facial expressions unless they're "standard". To me, this pic looks like you wanted to make a "goofy" face. I guess it wasn't your intention, but it doesn't seem "sad" to me.



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20 Nov 2011, 10:08 am

my suggestion: talk to yourself in the mirror for 10-15 minutes a day.



Grisha
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20 Nov 2011, 10:10 am

deconstruction wrote:
I'm bad at reading facial expressions unless they're "standard". To me, this pic looks like you wanted to make a "goofy" face. I guess it wasn't your intention, but it doesn't seem "sad" to me.


Oh gawd - "goofy"? :oops: :(

I've actually found that there are such things as exercises for your face:

Link: Smile Exercises



Grisha
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20 Nov 2011, 10:11 am

minervx wrote:
my suggestion: talk to yourself in the mirror for 10-15 minutes a day.


I do this while conversing on Skype - it looks awful, I need to fix this...



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20 Nov 2011, 10:17 am

CosmicRuss wrote:
I have had endless strangers pass comment on my facial expression too, the usual "cheer up", "who has died ?" etc. I now have a Tuo Viso facial toner machine which I use now and again but try every day when brushing my teeth to do facial exercises too.
This video is quite educational [the lipstick is optional].
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QmOTWhm6khc[/youtube]

:lol:


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20 Nov 2011, 10:31 am

The thing is that now you're aware of it you're able to consciously change it.

I had the same thing happen to me with seeing my image from a different point of view. I get reminded of it in the reflection of other people's expressions (on a good day when I'm more aware) so I will change accordingly myself. Sometimes my face just flat out feels heavy, 'specially if I have a lot on my mind.



abaisse
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20 Nov 2011, 11:46 am

Grisha wrote:

Reminds me of this:

(Nice to see you posting again BTW :))

Image



:lol: Exactly.



deconstruction
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20 Nov 2011, 12:14 pm

Grisha wrote:
Oh gawd - "goofy"? :oops: :(


No, not goofy in a bad way! In a good way!

But don't take my word on it. I'm bad when it comes to judging other people's facial expressions!



TeaEarlGreyHot
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20 Nov 2011, 12:32 pm

I really have no idea what I look like to others when I'm neutral, but I do often get people trying to cheer me up. Sometimes I'm asked why I'm mad, too. :oops:

I think a lot about my facial expressions, which seems to help a little. Still, I doubt I'll ever find a 'fix' for it since it's my natural way of being.


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