Need Some Help!

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I don't really feel anything most of the time. I'm not affected by horrific stories in the news or things that happen to people I know. but then I go from that to feeling so terribly angry over the tiniest things, such as someone sitting in the seat i always sit in, in college or my things being moved around. I feel like my head is going to explode and I clench my fists and I wondered if any one else has this and any advice on how to control it. I'm seeing a psychiatric nurse in a few weeks to be tested for aspergers but it;s such a long wait, and I think after that appointment I'll have to wait a long time again for any help with coping with this.

It seems very much like Asperger's and I can relate to that. People with AS often have these intense feelings about things being moved around because they are used to a certain order and a deviation from that order is too much to handle. I don't care much to what happens in the news or to people, with an exception of something to do with my special interest or something I sympathize with. For example, a story about an autistic kid being unfairly handled by the police and having a meltdown once made me cry. I am also deeply moved by stories involving animal abuse. For example, this story actually made me burst into tears:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... twice.html

*closes window so not to cry again*

I get that teeth-grinding, fist-clenching, toe-curling, sweat-dripping (want more?) feeling from people holding their cutlery or pens the wrong way, from open cupboards, from people having one sleeve down and one up, from the sounds of swallowing and nose-blowing, from people spitting on the street, etcetera. I get so angry about these things I think I may die young from an exhausted heart, but I cannot help getting annoyed by them. The fact that I cannot bear to look at my own father when his sleeves aren't at the same height bothers me so much that I have burst into tears from the abovementioned anger and sadness/shame related to that anger.
I don't really have any tips on how to control this; I usually look away and pretend it's not happening. My father and a few close friends know of my obsession with sleeves and cupboards, but for some reason it was very shameful for me to tell them about it.

I'm sorry for not really answering your question but I wanted you to know you're not alone. I've had this for as long as I can remember and I hate it, but obviously haven't found a good way to rid myself of it.

Sorry, I did not realize that you were asking about help as to how to control these tendencies. I usually just tell people that it bothers me or just leave it alone and let it impinge on me. Yeah, in a way telling people about it and telling them to change it is kind of controlling, but it's about preserving your sanity over everything else. When I take too much of it in, I could have a meltdown and it's not pretty.

Other people having messy or tangled hair bothers me. Not to the point of getting angry, but to the point of just having to point it out. Luckily, it's usually younger people who do this, so I can say something in my "Mom voice". I've actually gotten a brush and brushed my kids friends hair because of this. Once my oldest son had a friend with long hair that he hadn't brushed in over a week. It was tangled. He didn't want to do anything about it and refused to. They were about 16 at the time. I went and got the bottle of spray detangler that I used on my youngest daughter, went into my son's room and made the boy sit on the floor while I sprayed and brushed his hair and got the tangles out. He was mad, my son thought it was funny, but I was all Mom-like and told him "Hush! Sit still! Well, it WOULDNT be pulling if you had brushed it!"

I felt so much better when it was neat again.

Now, one of the friends of my older daughter, who comes over every day, is trying to get dredlocks. He's white. White people's hair doesn't do that without a special perm. Also, when black people grow dreds, they start with very short hair and divide and twist them then let them grow out neatly from there, twisting them as the grow. This boy started with shoulder length hair that he just didn't wash or brush. It's massive tangles. He's much bigger than me, and about 24 years old, so I can't make him let me brush it. Plus, it's too tangled, I would have to use the clippers and shave it off into a buzz cut. Every day I say "Garrett, let me do something about that hair!" He laughes and says "No Miss Frances, but when I decide to get rid of it, I'll come over and let you shave it off". I'm gonna hold him to that!

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

It's a very Aspie thing. We often like routine, order, things to be neat or the same. I don't like people sitting in my chair/spot, or using/moving my things.

I'm a big tea drinker and my spouse had a cleaning person come over to help reorganize the kitchen a while back. When I came home that night, all my tea and tea pots were sitting on my desk (I usually have 20-25 types of tea) with a note. I became very upset, even more so when I went to the cupboard where I kept my tea and found dishes in its place. No one could understand how I felt, but I was upset about it for days. I tried to explain how I felt and that I need a spot to put everything. I now have a place in a different cupboard, but it's still not the same as before…

I'm glad to hear it's not just me who has problems with people moving my things, i feel sometimes like I'm being irrational but that doesn't matter at the time. I feel like shouting at the top of my voice. I'm hoping that I can explain correctly to the person I speak to about how I feel, or well lack of feeling. It's so hard to explain to people who don't understand, and usually look at me like I'm some kind of freak if I start to move my fingers when I'm stressed or angry. It's like I go from one extreme to another! I think I've always been like this, but I've never known what it was until I watched a film about a guy with aspergers and so much of it made so much sense to me!