Aspie Wannabees

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In my endless crusade to win friends, I regularly get put off by people who, if I disclose to them, eagerly respond, "I get like that!" or worse, "I think I may have that!" The trouble is, these people are pretty obviously not even close to being on the spectrum. I find it invalidating. Has anyone else experienced this?

Maybe they're just trying to make conversation.

I think that the problem here is that the spectrum is so broad and encompasses so many different types of people. It also varies in severity.

I would take it as a compliment. Perhaps they admire you and are looking for ways to connect.

Maybe they are just trying to make conversation, but I know what you mean. I was talking to someone who was concerned that their kid might have OCD and another person interjected with oh I like to count steps every once in a while (which this kid was a counter). Who cares - did they do it for 30 minutes or were they unable to go up the porch because of it. So I find it irksome when people like to say that they understand about depression, or anxiety or ASD by relating to some momentary feeling they had. It also kind of seems belittling.

Edited again because of spelling.

I get the opposite response but similiar results...the teo people I have talked to about As,read the
Wekipidia def. and decided that I dont have it because..."you arent obsessed with train schedules and dont flap your arms"...ok...Some people are not interested or incapable of,looking beneath the surface of things they have no interest in.Sounds to me like they are really saying..."who cares about you,lets get back to something interesting...ME"

Another thing for me....Both of these individuals DO have a lot of "aspie traits" and thats probably why they can "tolerate" me and I like them.....

Maybe they tell you, "I think I have that!" because they really do think so.

A lot of problems and issues that people with AS have are things that everybody can encounter at some point in their lives. A big example would be that we get tired of people fairly easily. It's just that for AS people, those issues don't go away, and/or are more severe.

Unfortunately, you'll also meet those dumbfarts that will say it just to mock you.

Maybe. NTs will do nearly anything to get me to say something. Today someone at school thought they could get my attention by telling me they had a dragon scale.

Months ago, when I wrote on my gallery journal I had AS, one guy left a comment saying "I probably had some AS too". I thought he maybe wanted I thought AS was very common and normal.

A lot of NTs think AS, ADHD, classic autism, and other disorders are something like a sickness with no cure. And some NTs try to make us "feel better", because they don't know the reality.

NTs are obsessed with fitting in and measuring up, so if they are stuck with you for more than two minutes, they will try to identify with you. And some do it to shut you up, so you know you're not so special. I had a "friend" that whenever I described my son's autistic traits or special issues, she'd chime in with "all kids do that" "the kids I take care of (nanny) do that". So, it got to be really frustrating.
Then, when she finally realized that there are special autistic traits, she then started diagnosing people she didn't like with it. that pissed me off too.

Wow that's just wrong.

I've found similar, so instead of sharing things I know they could just mimic or play along with, I tend to share things I know I pursue to the extent that none other does, you would think they wouldn't be interested, but one can find miraculous insights through "obsession", yes its true its all in the delivery, so instead of saying "I have aspergers" though I've used it to try explain certain things, I now prefer to speak what I feel like speaking, people can always tune out if they're not interested.

Its much more fun to talk to people about topics I'm interested in than to constantly talk about how "disabled" I am in relation to something I'm not even that interested in, in the first place?

I think its easy for us to tell who is bullshitting or not, personally I don't find it hard at all, its simply the way someone says it, I was told by a girl she was bi-polar, and though I accept all manics are different in unique ways I know for a fact she is most definately not manic in any sense of the word, its simply a call saying "I'm too slack to pursue my less socially acceptable interests, or to make them culturally interesting, so I'll give myself a label to blame it off"

Meaning I've met bi-polar people in the past, and its generally not something show off about, its a torturous (of course not always) journey that they have to work out for themself, and they sure as hell don't wanna preach about it.

I use AS when I can't explain something to someone, when I've failed 10 times I'll try to get them to understand I might not think the same, but I won't try at my own expense, its pointless getting angry or upset because of others ignorance, in fact its something we can use

I think that NTs who say this probably do experience many of the things they're talking about. I think it's best to give them the benefit of the doubt. How would you like it if people thought you didn't have asperger's, if you did. You cant ever be sure whether or not someone you're talking to experiences what they're speaking of so it's best to give them the benefit of the doubt in my opinion.

Yes

but

I wouldn't be too harsh on them. You may not know, but we aren't really THAT different. Of course some people will have a few aspie traits. Hell, I even think i'm more social than a lot of the NTs I know. Some of them have TERRIBLE people skills.

I know this isn't true to a T, but it's got to get you thinking. (quote someone said)

"Do you have anxiety, poor people skills, obsess over certain things? Congratulations, you're just like everyone else."

One bad thing aspies can do is act like we're a totally different species. We aren't We are all human. And when you're an aspie, everything you are is not that way because you're an aspie. Some traits are just being human.

Heh, I know what you mean. Some people will say that they feel they have it because they genuinely did have one fleeting moment of feeling that way, and they don't realise that actually you feel that way all the time (or whatever.)

I showed a friend the DSM-IV criteria for OCD last night, and he said he thought he may have it because 'so much of the applies to everyone.' I asked him, such as what? And he replied that he has to check things. It turns out he has to check that the doors are locked before he leaves the house ... which takes him all of two minutes. I then pointed out part C of the criteria, and upon finding that no, two minutes is not excessive, and certainly not time-consuming he agreed that he probably has nothing to worry about! But in his case I know he honestly thought that it meant he may have it - I think a lot of the time people just need to be educated, to be honest.

My experience has been that with the people I've encountered who do have AS traits, they deny it vehemently. So maybe these people are just trying to relate to you, or, as others said, make conversation? Because one technique for conversation is finding commonalities.

I've experienced that.

I think it's cool. It gives Asperger's a positive side.

I also think NT's do this to find common ground.