Question for the aspergers guys who desperately want a GF

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This is mainly directed towards the guys who have never had anything but romantic rejection, ever.

Do you want a GF because you actually want a relationship, or do you want a GF to make you feel like/prove you are worth something and aren't completely repulsive?

This is a serious question. I think a lot of guys want a GF for the wrong reasons.

Let me clarify this.

You aren't repulsive, none of you. You are worth just as much as those around you. Yes, it's harder to steal a woman's heart when you are a certain way but that has nothing to do with your worth. It's hard to meet girls and even harder to meet a compatible one. That doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with you. You are just different. Do not let this get you down, when you have the underlying potential to be happy. You aren't worthless.

Depends on what you'd call a relationship. I could say I've been close to some people, but it would seem they've only ever put up with me out of pity. In any case, I'd still like to put in my $0.02.

Years and years ago(perhaps around 10-12) I'd been jealous of my older brother. He'd always got to do everything first, was always more popular, more into what was considered cool, etc. Having a girlfriend(even more than one at a time) was just one aspect of it.

Not to say that it hasn't changed. I do think a lot of it has to do with feelings of self worth. I realize now it doesn't matter so much, but that doesn't make it any less difficult to deal with the fact that others all around you have someone who values them so much while you're on your own. It's still possible to be lonely.

The important thing is to not be desperate. Going for the first person who'll have you is only likely to lead to disaster or at the very least, wasted time. It's not worth being with somebody who you don't feel anything for, and because of that it will probably not work out.

i want a family.

so, in order for that to happen i need (not want) a female partner.

Okay, I'll bite.

I want a girlfriend, and eventually more, because I want to exist as part of a pair-bonded household. I.E. I want a relationship. Part of this is, and I'll admit it may be selfish, but I'm nearly alone on this planet. I have 2 family members left, and a slew of friends who are typical fair-weather only. Soon I'll have no Family. The logical conclusion then is to join another one, or to create one.

I've lived 14 years without sex. It's less important to me than belonging, be that in a place, or with a group of people.

I want everything, good and bad, that comes with that: the fights, the eventual degradation of both partners appearance, the companionship. Maybe this is difficult for some people to understand, especially considering the way that the Media portrays men's attitudes, but I actually like the boring domestic stuff that comes with being in a committed relationship. I also like the not so boring stuff that only comes with being in a committed relationship.

I'm also very liberal in my attitudes towards women. She makes more money than me? Good for her. She doesn't want to shave her pits, I'm okay with that. The point I'm trying to make is, if the other person is special enough to want to be in a relationship with them, then it doesn't matter about little things like that. The big issues of compatibility are the ones that can't be worked around.

I know I'm not repulsive or worthless. That is precisely what makes it so frustrating. I'm incredibly well read, I can carry on an intelligent conversation, I take care of my physical appearance, I remember important dates and anniversaries, and yet, guys who have none of these qualities manage to get all the women I find suitable or whom show any interest in me at all.

We have bumped heads on this already once before, but I cannot in good conscience countenance stringing along a girl who I find unsuitable, hoping I develop some sort of attraction for her, anymore than I would expect her to do that for me. If both partners don't feel some sort of attraction, then there is no hope. I can understand and respect that. What I cannot understand is being attracted to me, then when they find out what I'm really like, they suddenly get spooked and run back to party some more. I think they get scared of commitment just as much as the media says Men do.

What do you mean by that?

I want a relationship because I function a lot better when I have someone. Caring about someone motivates me to be a better person & having someone I can turn to helps me sort things out & make better decisions.

I don't know about any of you, but I strongly feel everyone needs a good freind and a kind careing loving relationship.

I know I cry about not having a girlfriend. heck, I cry about not haveing any friends.

to all of you, Ask yourself this...
Whats important in life? is life about careing for other people? or is life just about yourself? i'd suggest you deeply consider both options and provide yourself with the correct answer.

I think the number 1 reason is to stop being lonely.