Two Soviet women are at the back of a bread line. One says to the other "this bread line is so long." The other replies "you should consider yourself lucky. I've heard in the capitalist countries they don't even have bread lines."
LOL!
More Soviet jokes:
An American dog, a Polish dog and a Soviet dog sit together. The American dog says “In my country if you bark long enough, you will be heard and given some meat”. The Polish dog replies “What is ‘meat’?” The Soviet dog says “What is ‘bark’?”
A man was jailed 15 years for calling Joseph Stalin a fathead. One year for sedition, 14 years for revealing a state secret
A commissar was visiting a Soviet potato farm. The party official asks a farmer how things are going, and the farmer replies that the harvest is so bountiful that the potatoes would reach the ''foot of God'' if piled on top of one another. ''But this is the Soviet Union,'' says the commissar, ''there is no God here.'' The farmer replies, ''That's all right, there are no potatoes, either.''
What are the four things wrong with Soviet agriculture? Spring, summer, winter and fall.
What is the definition of a Communist? Someone who has read the works of Marx and Lenin. What is the definition of an anti-Communist? Someone who understands the works of Marx and Lenin.
The regional KGB headquarters in Arkhangelsk suffered a major fire and was almost completely destroyed. Shortly after, a man called looking for help. “I’m sorry, we can’t do anything,” said the receptionist. “The KGB has burnt down.” Five minutes later, the receptionist received another call. “I’m sorry, we can’t help. The KGB has burnt down.” Another five minutes passed, and the phone rang again. The receptionist recognised the voice as the man who’d twice called previously. “Why do you keep calling? I told you that the KGB has burnt down.” “I know. I just like hearing it.”
A man walks into a shop. He asks the clerk, “You don’t have any meat?” The clerk says, “No, here we don’t have any fish. The shop that doesn’t have any meat is across the street.”
A worker standing in a liquor line says: “I have had enough, save my place, I am going to shoot Gorbachev.” Two hours later he returns to claim his place in line. His friends ask, “Did you get him?” “No, the line there was even longer than the line here.”
A man is driving with his wife and small child. A militia man pulls them over and makes the man take a breathalyzer test. “See,” the militia man says, “you are drunk.” The man protests that the breathalyzer must be broken and invites the cop to test his wife. She also registers as drunk. Exasperated, the man invites the cop to test his child. When the child registers drunk as well, the cop shrugs, says, “Yes, perhaps it is broken,” and sends them on their way. Out of earshot the man tells his wife, “See, I told you it wouldn’t hurt to give the kid a couple shots of vodka.”
_________________ #bringthemhomenow
No terror, no war. No sympathy for terrorists or their supporters and sympathizers
Joined: 27 Oct 2014 Age: 39 Gender: Non-binary Posts: 25,516 Location: Right over your left shoulder
04 Jul 2021, 2:45 pm
Conservative t-shirts are sometimes funny but usually not the way they intend to be funny.
_________________ Watching liberals try to solve societal problems without a systemic critique/class consciousness is like watching someone in the dark try to flip on the light switch, but they keep turning on the garbage disposal instead. 戦争ではなく戦争と戦う
Joined: 27 Oct 2014 Age: 39 Gender: Non-binary Posts: 25,516 Location: Right over your left shoulder
07 Jul 2021, 3:54 am
_________________ Watching liberals try to solve societal problems without a systemic critique/class consciousness is like watching someone in the dark try to flip on the light switch, but they keep turning on the garbage disposal instead. 戦争ではなく戦争と戦う
Joined: 27 Oct 2014 Age: 39 Gender: Non-binary Posts: 25,516 Location: Right over your left shoulder
17 Jul 2021, 4:19 pm
_________________ Watching liberals try to solve societal problems without a systemic critique/class consciousness is like watching someone in the dark try to flip on the light switch, but they keep turning on the garbage disposal instead. 戦争ではなく戦争と戦う