Already booked my cruise. Now feeling apprehensive.

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In order to understand this thread better, you may want to reread my previous thread http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt187993.html, but I'll give the gist of it here. I desperately need to take a vacation, but have no one to go with. My friends are all busy and/or unable to go, and I don't have a girlfriend. So I resigned to vacationing solo. In that thread, I was debating if I should go to an all-inclusive resort or on a cruise. I ended up deciding on the cruise, because it's just more socially acceptable to go on a cruise alone than to a resort, especially with the line like Carnival Cruises, which makes an effort to accommodate solo travelers, and it's the one I chose. Because others cost more, some of them exponentially more.

So went ahead, created an account on the Carnival Cruises website, and made a reservation! I feel like I should be elated, but instead, I'm having quite a few second thoughts, much like, but not quite, buyer's remorse. Not enough to cancel the trip, but still. And the financial costs play at most a 10% role in regretting my decision. I find myself obsessively searching for reviews of the cruising company, my ship name, and the ports of call. Not so much to educate myself so I can make the best choices, but due to a gripping fear of getting eaten alive by massive crowds of judgmental NTs. I start questioning my decision to go, asking myself questions:
-> How will I look like sitting alone on the Lido deck all day during at sea days?
-> Will I be targeted by pickpockets and thugs in ports when they'll see me walking alone?
-> If I go to clubs onboard, will some douchebags start harrassing me Straw Dogs-style because they saw me in a club alone?
-> Will I be bored out of my mind because I won't have anyone to talk to, as in "debrief" by comparing notes of experiences?
-> Will security officers misunderstand me and/or act like it's no big deal when I report to them that I'm being harassed by other passengers?
-> Will I just plain look like a loser who has to travel alone, even though Carnival Cruises makes an effort to prevent that, at least on the surface?

Of course, it could be a complete opposite: everyone will be too mellowed out and relaxed to worry about why "some guy they never met and will never see again" travels alone, I'll find a dance partner during Latin music nights, where guests are more open to dancing with new people than when typical club music plays, and I'll find just enough activities that boredom won't be an issue. Be that as it possibly may, I'm not holding my breath for it. I was never an optimist and don't plan to become one, because life never gave me even one reason to.

So there you go. Reserved a spot on what's normally a pricey vacation (I got an great early booking discount), got approval for time off at work, and now second-guessing everything I did. Please post any advice you can think of that will allay my worries. Or confirm them, I don't care that much. I'm just wondering why I'd be worrying myself sick over something that many people, both NTs and aspies, consider to be one of the most pleasant experiences.

Carnival cruise is awesome, been on 2 cruises, both carnival. Second time I was old enough to gamble.

At ports you are usually at tourist friendly zones, it would be obvious when you move out of the shopping area.

The Comedy clubs were funny but super crowded, you would have to go there right away for a seat. I went to it with my grandparents, brother and cousin were doing something else. The three of us had to sit in a 2 seater couch because it was so crowded. We ended up sitting next to some girls that were very pretty (lol).

I did not go on the cruise alone but I hung out by myself a lot (mostly gambling, studied card counting a lot before I went). Because I looked 16 a lot of people were interested in how I new so much about blackjack at a younger age than most.

Oh and its a vacation, no one gives a crap about anything

My oldest daughter went on a cruise on that line with her fiance this summer. They went to Jamaica, Cozumel, and the Caymen Islands. If you want, I can ask her those questions for you.

She really enjoyed it. She and her fiance both are very quiet and shy and tend to keep to themselves. She said the worst part about it was being seated at a table with a family of strangers. You are assigned the seating and you sit with the same people throughout the cruise. She said she felt awkard at first but they were very nice and weren't pushy.

I have to agree with the previous posters, there's not a lot to worry about on a cruise, especially people messing with you. They take security very seriously on cruise ships and if someone were harassing you it would be dealt with swiftly. Also, I think you over estimate how much strangers care about what you're doing. The truth is most people don't notice you and don't care, especially on a cruise. People won't think about you sitting there alone unless you're masturbating or something out on the deck. Last but not least they take you to safe places for the land part. Trust me, they don't want passengers encountering any problems. Pissed off passengers require paperwork and it's bad PR. You are probably not the only one alone on the cruise, you might find a friend.

My brother who is NT told me one time that everyone has their own self conscious issues and everyone worries about what other's think of them. Just remember that everyone who you think may be judging you for going alone are self analyzing their self and are probably not too concerned with you.
They don't know you, but the one thing that these "people" know is that you are so confident in yourself that you have no problem going on a cruise by yourself and you have the career and income in order to afford going.

Also keep this in mind. You will never see these people again.......ever, probably. And don't worry about they may think of you.

Also keep in mind that you can make more money and the rest and relaxation that you get from this trip will give you the patience and insight to make more money. This trip is an investment.

Damn, now I want to go on a cruise.

Do you work for Carnival?

LMAO he should

I've been on one cruise (Celebrity Cruises) to Alaska from Vancouver. That one was a couples' cruise, and my wife and I went before we were married. This sounds a bit ridiculous, but if anything, it should be an autism haven! Everything is so orderly and on-time. Meals are scheduled (although there are eating places available most all times), and everything is structured and planned out. If anything, a spontaneous NT would have more trouble with it. I didn't find any intimidating situations, but I would probably be a bit nervous to have strayed away from the group when ashore. Our group was in Canada and the USA the whole time, but in a foreign country other than Canada, I might be much more nervous. You don't have to participate in all the activities, and you can just stay behind if you need a few hours alone. Chances are, if you have a shared state room, the other person will be out most of the time.

To feel the most secure myself, I carried my passport with me, on my person, at all times, along with at least $200 cash and a credit card. Of course I locked those items in the state room safe while I was going to the pool, etc, onboard the ship. I also called my cellphone carrier ahead, and told them where I was going, and I bought a month of service for Canada-to-USA calls. That way, if anything did somehow go wrong, I'd be able to pay my way and show ID to get help and get home. Definitely also I would wear a MedicAlert bracelet with "High Functioning Autism", or something, so as in case of any contact with foreign police, you won't be accused of being on drugs, which can happen to any of us.

Bottom line, I think you'll do fine, and you'll be very pleased that you went!

Charles

I have been on a cruise before. My favorite thing was quite simplistic. I looked forward to and adored seeing the striking, stark beauty of the Caribbean sea from the window at every mealtime. It just filled me with this sense of spaciousness and the color was so deep wiand vivid. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen and it transformed me. That blue can only be matched by the indigo wonder of the night sky with tiny little silver beads that remind me of cookie decorations!
It's awesome Carnival accommodates single passengers. When I went, booking was pretty much based on double occupancy.


Chances are you won't be on the lido deck all the time. The cruise line will have planned activities for passengers while you are at sea, then you will have ports of call to look forward to. The cruise line might put you at a table with another single so you will have a chance to buddy up with him or her during mealtimes and the meals are wonderful. Caviar, steak, lobster, are just some of the goodies.


You will most likely not have to worry about anyone picking your pocket. Most everything is inclusive and you might not have to carry your money around unless you are planning to do some drinking. The cruise ship has meetings about this and will inform you when you arrive. They should give you all the info and tell you where your lifeboat is. You will have to go to your lifeboat, find out where the life jacket is, first thing, then they talk about other important bits of info at meetings. They will tell you how to avoid trouble on land as well. The ship might have a safe you can store valuables in if you do not wish to keep them in your cabin.

I did get harassed by other kids on the cruise, and only threatened to jump off the deck into the sea a couple of times, heh, but I wasn't totally serious. But then again, I was surrounded by kids and my experience is atypical, maybe. Adults might be more mature and easier to deal with. Maybe you'll get to sit at the Captain's table if you play your cards right, heh.
One of the first things I did was go to this little party for the kids of cruisers. I had so much fun at that party, before they figured out I was "weird" and started shunning me. Got to play some fun games, like running a string through our clothes to see which team could get everyone stringed together first.
Don't let the idea of them shunning you stop you from going and having fun, though. Despite this one happiness, I had the time of my life on that cruise and wouldn't have minded living on that boat year long.


Most of them won't pay a lot of attention. They will be swimming or dancing or playing slots. There will be all kinds of stuff going on. Plenty of nightly shows of many varieties and ports of call can take all day. If you have three ports of call, you will have three days away from the boat. I liked Seven Mile Beach and the Mayan ruins at Tulum. We rented a sailboat and it was fun sailing around the coast of Grand Cayman. The boat rental people taught us how to sail it and everything.

I just showed my daughter your post and she said it's not like that at all. It's not just a bunch of jocks and cheerleader types, it's a lot of families. She said that nobody will bother you, everybody is all caught up in what they are doing. She and her fiance are both shy and she said you can meet and talk to a thousand people if you want to and they are all nice, or if you want to be by yourself, then nobody will bother you. She said there were tons of people sitting around by themselves reading or whatever. Nobody will assume you are on the cruise alone just because they see you alone. Lots of people split up and go do their own thing. She said if you go on the Elation, it has a comedy club that's great. She said you can eat in your room if you are uncomfortable because they will sit you with other people, and nobody thinks its strange if you do that. She also said "Everybody who works there is foreign and they are real nice". As for in ports, she said she thought you would be fine. Her fiance was with her the whole time and he's about 6-3 240 though. But there is a lot of security in those ports because if passengers get bothered, then the line will start using another port and they will lose money. It's in their best interest to keep it safe and friendly.

She said you will love it. She also said "He's overthinking it Mom, just like you do!" I didn't say a word LOL! She didn't notice this was WP and she doesn't even know what WP is. I just smiled. I asked her if she thought I would have a good time alone a cruise. She told me I'd be in heaven because I could do whatever "crazy stuff" I wanted to do and nobody would say anything or even notice me.

If it makes you feel better I was feeling apprehensive when I went to New York City and I have reason to. And I was going with my sister and brother-in-law. I was apprehensive about the plane and being in the city. But with my sister and brother-in-law there it was not so bad.

You may be by you're self but it is 100% times safer then NYC. But I can still understand being apprehensive. But think of it this way you could be going to a big city by you're self. Which is not always a good idea. A Cruise ship people run this to the point that if the caption can kick you off just for looking at someone the wrong way.

You won't have much to worry about there.

After seeing other responses, I thought I'd chime in with my own. First of all, everyone, thank you for the words of encouragement. OliveOilMom, your comment in particular was quite insightful. Carnival ships really do have a lot of activities for getting people to interact, helping them pass the time on the ship, and organizing excursion groups. I read that they have Latin dance lessons in the evenings, and I'm a good dancer, so that's give me an advantage (after seeing me dance well in class, women will be more likely to dance with me in clubs.) As for ports, I'll probably bite the bullet and pay the extra cost of booking shore excursions with Carnival, rather with outside companies, just for the safety of the cruise line looking out for me and to avoid the risk of getting stranded. And even in Mexican ports, I speak Spanish well enough to ask a police officer to help me find a US embassy and even bargain with street vendors. The only confirmed dangerous ports are in Jamaica (people in reviews said so), but I won't be traveling there on my cruise.

With all said said, Carnival does not accommodate solo travelers in the financial sense: they still charge them a big single supplement. I just figured it onto the cruise budget, and cut costs by booking an inside cabin guarantee (I may get a better one, but the booking agent said not to count on it) and reserving it far ahead of time. It's either paying $200 extra and traveling in a few months, as opposed to traveling god-knows-when due to waiting until I find a person to go with and available vacation time.

I'm feeling a little better now, although I'm still taking massive precautions. I'm studying deck plans and dining room menus obsessively, watching YouTube videos of Carnival ships, and constantly searching for travelogues. This way, I'll be able to confidently walk to destinations on the ship, and quickly decide what to order when sitting with new people at my table (I'm usually indecisive when it comes to food). I'm still planning to just walk around; putzing around on the topmost deck under the night sky just seems so relaxing. And if an attractive woman stops me and says "hey, didn't I dance with you during the salsa lessons?" (while I try to think quick, to get past my face blindness and remember her), it'll be even better .

Anyway, feel free to keep posting; hope this post doesn't kill the thread. I'm finding very helpful.

She went to Jamaica on her cruise and they went places at the port. She loved it. But, like I said, her fiance is a pretty big guy and very protective of her. You wouldn't know he was protective because he acts harmless. He is very shy, polite and quiet and tries to avoid confrontation, just like she does. But if somebody hurt her, he would go off on them. You don't really pick that vibe up from him, so if they left a quiet shy couple alone in port there, they must have upped security.

We had talked about that Italian cruise ship sinking and she was shocked they never had a safety drill. She said that they had a real long safety drill before they even left the home port. That was the first thing they did after boarding. You had about 30 minutes to get settled in your room and then the safety thing was mandatory. They went over everything. Life jackets are in the rooms and everything.

I really don't think people are going to bother you, or even notice you if you don't want to be noticed. Most people will be concentrating on their own vacation and enjoying their cruise. After all, it's a cruise. You don't go on a cruise to stare at the other passengers, so that might make you feel a little less self conscious.

Do you want to join in on activities or had you rather just be left alone and relax? I just asked my daughter about joining in and all and she said they don't come around and get you or anything, they put a thing in your room every day when they clean it with a list of what all they have going on, where and when it is, if you have to sign up or if you can just go in and sit down. She said they have a lot of stuff like trivia and games and all that and it's interactive. I asked if they pair you up with somebody for those things and she said not that she knows of, you just pair off yourself if you are supposed to. I told her you are shy and she said to tell you not to worry that people will come up to you and talk to you and all. You can do that to them too. She said they have a whole lot of stuff going on every day and there is always something to do. She also said that a lot of the really fun stuff is early and they didn't do a lot of it because they didn't get up until about 10 or so.

We didn't experience trouble in Ocho Rios. Just a lot of women wanting money for cornrowing hair. I rode horses on a banana plantation and got to see the famous waterfall at Dunns River. Mom booked everything through info she got from the cruiseline. I wanted to visit Jamaica because of reggae music.

I want to add "we" were just a single woman and her kid and didn't experience any difficulties anywhere we went. We sailed with the Vikings on Norwegian though.

They had the ports of call we wanted.

Sure, a few of the passengers were rude and insensitive but that's normal for people. The best thing was to be somewhere where enough fun stuff and beautiful scenery existed to offset obnoxious people and being at sea certainly does do that. I felt my spirits lift just being close to the ocean and the sea breeze.