So my first date is tomorrow...

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Whosinabunker
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23 Feb 2012, 3:08 pm

AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO! I've never made it this far before...I'm so lost. We are just simply going to go see a movie together, which you wouldn't think would be that stressful...but for someone like me who has NEVER had a girlfriend before...I'm freakin' terrified. Does anyone have any helpful tips to not completely botch this first date? Oh and if this post was too vague, I can provide any extra info you need, just ask =D



Chooty
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23 Feb 2012, 3:14 pm

Whosinabunker wrote:
AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO DO! I've never made it this far before...I'm so lost. We are just simply going to go see a movie together, which you wouldn't think would be that stressful...but for someone like me who has NEVER had a girlfriend before...I'm freakin' terrified. Does anyone have any helpful tips to not completely botch this first date? Oh and if this post was too vague, I can provide any extra info you need, just ask =D


On the one hand know your limits & let go off all expectations for this date to be more than it will be (that is, getting to know eachother better & trying to have fun). Thus don't attempt stupid stuff..

On the other hand try to get most conversation out of it. Use the oppertunity to let her get to know you better - mainly your positive sides. Now you have a window of oppertunity to move beyond the superficial.

But keep in mind that our goal, soldier, is stricktly limited to making it to the next date. That's it & it ain't that hard, so don't stress. Besides if you like her, being with her must be nice, so it will be a good time.



blueroses
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23 Feb 2012, 3:15 pm

Congrats on the date. Most people are nervous on first dates and chances are she'll be just as nervous and worried about first impressions as you are. I'd suggest you keep it light and steer the conversation to asking questions about her. It shows you're genuinely interested in getting to know her better, plus takes some of the pressure off you because she's the one doing most of the talking. Good luck!



AardvarkGoodSwimmer
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23 Feb 2012, 8:07 pm

Maybe after the movie ask her if she'd like to get a cup of coffee or tea at a nearby coffee shop?

And graciously accept either answer. Two hours + is a lot of time to spend with a new person.

And maybe just a nice kiss on the cheek or a peck on the mouth at the conclusion of the date. Typically, more kissing comes on the third date, but not as any kind of etched-in-concrete time schedule.

And like the above poster says, she's likely to be nervous, too. And that's okay, too.

I've had some success making a conscious decision to turn down my internal censor so that my default setting is that it's probably okay to go ahead and say it anyway, unless it clearly jumps out at me as inappropriate. Just don't overdo this part.

Good luck. And enjoy the process. :jocolor:



hyperlexian
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23 Feb 2012, 11:56 pm

awesome, glad to hear it!! !! i don't have any advice without hearing a more specific question. dates are not my strong suit.


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simon_says
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24 Feb 2012, 12:11 am

Just relax, expect nothing, ask questions to fill conversation gaps. Stuff that's mentioned above.

Whatever happens you'll learn something. That's how everyone does it.



BurningMoose
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24 Feb 2012, 12:53 am

A. She's not your girlfriend, and treating her as such will scare her away. She's a girl who agreed to go to a movie with you.

B. Just make friends with her normally (I know, I know...not exactly our strong suit to begin with). As in, treat her like you would any friend--have fun with her, make fun of things if that's your style. Like old friends who've known each other forever, let your guard down a little. Without more details, that's all I got for ya...hope it helps!



DiabloDave363
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24 Feb 2012, 2:49 pm

how did it go?


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Whosinabunker
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24 Feb 2012, 4:32 pm

DiabloDave363 wrote:
how did it go?


You timed this very well with my return. It went okay I guess, we went to go see a movie so not much talking was done. Not to mention every gentlemanly opportunity I had they'd already accounted for. For example: I wanted to pay for their tickets, they already ordered online T_T. Oh well, I couldn't follow it up either because she and her sister had plans afterwards. But I got to meet them, and I learned more about how they work, so that's good =D. Thanks for asking by the way!



Thom_Fuleri
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24 Feb 2012, 5:00 pm

Whosinabunker wrote:
Not to mention every gentlemanly opportunity I had they'd already accounted for. For example: I wanted to pay for their tickets, they already ordered online T_T.


That's a result. You appear gentlemanly for offering, and don't even have to spend any money! :D