What grades in school were the hardest socially?

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What grades were the hardest for you socially?
Lower Elementary grades (ages 5-7) 8%  8%  [ 10 ]
Upper Elementary grades (ages 8-10) 8%  8%  [ 10 ]
Middle Grades (ages 11-13) 47%  47%  [ 59 ]
Lower High School (ages 14-16) 29%  29%  [ 36 ]
Upper High School (ages 17+, still in school) 9%  9%  [ 11 ]
Total votes : 126

ocdgirl123
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23 Apr 2012, 4:05 pm

I am finding the high school grades to harder socially than middle school or elementary school. I would say that grades 4-6 year the easiest for me. The school thought grade 6 was hard but that is just because I didn't need as many friends as they thought I did. This happened in grade 1 too. I only wanted a few friends but the school assumed I wanted me so said that I had a really hard time making friends and next to none, when I was happy with my friendships. Ever had someone do that to you?


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23 Apr 2012, 4:11 pm

I chose Age 11-13. In the UK, age 11 is when we move into high school.
Going from a school with only 30 kids per year group to one with 150 per year group was a big shock. In primary school, you tend to know everyone and teachers have more time for you. I was swamped in high school. Kids literally walked all over me; the corridors were so crowded and I'd get pushed over and couldn't get back up because of all the people just walking on top of me.



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23 Apr 2012, 4:12 pm

All of them.


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23 Apr 2012, 4:14 pm

I found the middle grades to be the most awkward for me socially. For me this was centered on the ages of 12 to 14 (7th and 8th grades). My best friend abandoned me because his parents wanted him to socialize with others besides just me. I did not follow him into his wider expanse of friends because it did not feel right (awkward). This was a period of my life where I began walking specific patterns in my backyard and in the school playground during recess. I wasn't really unhappy at this time, I was just trying to find my niche in life. As I always have, I enjoyed my interests greatly and found great satisfaction in them. Once in high school, I was popular in the band because I was quite good on the trombone and became a professional trombonist by the time I was 16.


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23 Apr 2012, 4:17 pm

I put upper elementary because I moved in the 4th grade and I did not make a friend until 6th grade. I was also with the same people in every class all day, so I did not have a chance to escape the bullies.

Lower high school would have been next, because the relief from not having the same people in all of my classes every day had worn off. By upper high school I had established a reputation for being different and a nerd so I coped with the people better. Unfortunately the bullying was mostly constant from the 4th grade when I moved until college.



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23 Apr 2012, 4:18 pm

I'm in the 10th grade, and it's only seemed to get harder and harder so far. In middle school, some people would try to initiate some kind of interaction with me. Now, I'm more or less ignored.



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23 Apr 2012, 4:21 pm

I'd say sixth to eighth grades were the most difficult for me. It felt like a lot of the other kids passed me up socially at that point, even though I was the oldest one in the class. This was the point at which I really started to feel like I was a little different than the other kids. On the other hand, second through fourth grades were probably the easiest for me.



ocdgirl123
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23 Apr 2012, 4:28 pm

UnLoser wrote:
I'm in the 10th grade, and it's only seemed to get harder and harder so far. In middle school, some people would try to initiate some kind of interaction with me. Now, I'm more or less ignored.


Yeah, that's like me too. I was completely ignored in grades 8-10, except by staff and a select few students.

EDIT: Maybe a mod could change the poll options to make it ages since in the UK you move to high school at 11, and in some places you don't go until you are 16? Just take the titles out and put the ages.


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cooliolio
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23 Apr 2012, 4:41 pm

I chose ages 11-13 as I had just moved to a secondary school, leaving behind my best friends. My new friends weren't really friends and teased me and stuff which was crap. I was a loner at lunch and just walked around the playground. I love school this year (upper sixth) because now people know what I'm like and I have a best friend for the first time since like primary school. I sometimes just go to the 6th form study at lunch to get away from everyone but it's nice to have somewhere I can do that now that I'm in 6th form. Plus no more P.E. in 6th form and awkward changing times and awkward running and being teased because of it.



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23 Apr 2012, 4:47 pm

Guineapigged wrote:
I chose Age 11-13. In the UK, age 11 is when we move into high school.
Going from a school with only 30 kids per year group to one with 150 per year group was a big shock. In primary school, you tend to know everyone and teachers have more time for you. I was swamped in high school. Kids literally walked all over me; the corridors were so crowded and I'd get pushed over and couldn't get back up because of all the people just walking on top of me.


Although the poll was about social difficulties, I really struggled with organising homework, correct books and so on. The time spent walking between classes and waiting created endless opportunities for bullies that simply didn't exist in primary school.

Jason



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23 Apr 2012, 4:54 pm

I hated school collectively, but I had the worst time in 5th grade.



Joe90
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23 Apr 2012, 4:55 pm

I didn't select anything, since my hardest years at school were when I was aged between 12 and 16, so it was practically the whole duration at High School. I hated High School, I found it so hard socially. At the primary schools, I didn't find it so bad. When I was aged between 4 and 7, I was too young to realise or even care what I was doing socially. All I was interested in was playing, and so were the other children, so I didn't have so much grief or negative emotions back then. I was just happy playing, whether other children played with me or not. And when I was aged between about 7 and 11, I found I became more self-aware and more ''grown-up'' compared to what I was as a toddler (which is typical in any child), but things didn't get much harder. I was asexual right up until the age of 12.

But I think being aged between 12 and 16 is hard for anybody because your hormones are changing and you are all the place, like you act like a little kid when you're too old, and then the next minute you think you're an adult when you're too young to do adult things, and so you feel like you're sitting on the line between childhood and adulthood. So it definately is much harder for Aspies (and people with other learning disabilities), around this age range.

I was glad to leave school. I was so happy on my last day of school. Even now I feel stressed at coping with life and responsibilities, but when I look back to when I was aged between 12 and 16, I suddenly get a twinge of happiness, because I was socially miserable when I was at High School. I had no friends, I had no idea how to fit in, and I just wanted to get out as quick as I could. Now I've learnt how to fit in, I've become more mature, and I have more friends.


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TechnoDog
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23 Apr 2012, 5:11 pm

Can I ask a question:-

Is One-To-One tutoring tolerated any more? At this autism place I mentioned it & they said I would have to come they as a person if I wanted to do that, rather than a volunteer?

Also turned a shy girl away.



Hanibal94
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23 Apr 2012, 5:23 pm

Middle Grades, because in Germany, that's when you transfer from grundschule (elementary) to gymnasium, which is like middle and high school.
The big change, combined with getting my diagnosis at this time, was real bad, and the other kids were jerks.
Things got better after the worst jerks left and everyone else got more mature.
It took a while before I came out of my shell and started socializing and overcoming some bad Aspie traits, but it was worth it.



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23 Apr 2012, 6:01 pm

Kids are usually the meanest in junior high(7th/8th). And 9th graders usually act very similar even though it's part of high school obviously.



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23 Apr 2012, 6:08 pm

I voted for middle grades but my worst years were grades 4-6. Starting in sixth grade and after I was never in the same school for more than a year so eventually things got a bit better as I got older.