Respect.

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Define it, how to get it, examples of respect, what is respect, etc.
How to respect another person.

I've been consciously trying to learn about since around age 13 14 ish.


I've been trying to learn why it annoys people to do whatever I do whenever I do it, why they may not interact with me, etc.
The problem since the 4th grade when kids start trying to act like adults (though they suck b@lls at it till like the 7th grade).

But at this point it's not simply about not sitting with strangers, tolerating annoying people,etc.

There's much more to it. I need to learn to respond to people without assuming harrassment or disrespect.

Respect is best summed up in the golden rule. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Also, listening to others, considering how your actions and words affect them, and using manners ( yes ma'am/sir, no ma'am/sir, please/thank you, saying excuse me when walking by someone, etc.). Also, it is tolerating differences in others and never acting as if you are superior to anyone ( sounds obvious, but I know a lot of people who make that mistake).

You basically earn respect. So if you're kind to others, others will be kind to you. Don't judge people and treat them as individuals.

Respect is an acknowledgement that you don't a damn thing about anything or anyone--an appreciation for the infinite and infinitely complex nature of the world, that you'll never understand it and aren't in a position to tell anyone anything. It's trying your best to walk a mile in someone else's shoes and realizing that others have feelings and troubles, too.

You might barely know a thing or two about yourself, if your lucky, but don't presume anything beyond that. By knowing that you know nothing, you will realize that you aren't in a position to dictate/criticize anyone's behavior (that is, unless of course you're 100% certain of yours, in which case, god help you).

This sort of stance towards the world, I believe, helps to curate respect for the world and for the struggles of others.

What is respect?
- Opening the door for anyone/everyone else.
- Asking about someone's day, even if you don't really give a sh_t.
- Saying "Yes, sir" and "No, ma'am".
- Shutting my flipping mouth and letting someone get a word in, edge-wise. (i.e. LISTENING).
- Taking the feelings of others into consideration.
- Trying one's best to be decent.

Regards to all. Have a great evening.

For me, respect is not trespass other people's rights or space. In that aspect it is very easy, because you only need to learn and fully understand people's rights (you can download the document from the UN site) to comply: respect their opinion, their property, their right to disagree, their body, their differences, etc. If you also get a book of manners (those are hard to find, but still exist - I have one), study it and apply it, I think you will be safe.

This is an interesting thread, I think respect is a hard thing to figure out, it seems to have three parts - to respect others, for others to respect you and to be able to communicate the respect. I think the communication of respect is where most of my problems are.

I struggle with how to apply the do unto others as you would have them do to you rule. Mainly because the way I want to be treated seems to differ to the way others want to be treated. I try to be considerate of how my words and actions affect others however doing this well requires theory of mind beyond what I currently have, so mostly I only really understand if the person explains to me. But tolerating differences in others, that is easier – though some people seem to have a hard time tolerating differences in me.

I think communicating intentions can be hard, like if I am feeling kind towards others but can’t really put myself in their shoes enough to know how to show that.

Your first paragraph was an interesting view on respect, one which I think fits very well with my view of respect. However how is asking about someones day even if you don’t care respectful – you are pointlessly asking them to talk?

Respect is a two way thing, like a relationship is generally a two way thing.
How respect is earned is by gaining good karma through your actions. So if your friendly and they are friendly then you both have respect. Otherwise there is no respect if you or the other person is giving unnecessary grief to vice versa then there is no or little respect.
Respect is generally judged by actions and words.

To me respect is many things.

1. Not stepping over your friend's boundaries numerous times
2. When you are included in your friend's events and you are always made to feel welcome
3. Not cutting you down for your views and beliefs
4. Being honest and upfront with you
5. Make you feel equal as a whole person rather than a half of one

I always viewed respect as being a balance between honesty and kindness. Mostly in the sense that if you truly respect someone, you are able and willing to tell them the truth even though it may seem harsh, yet accept them despite whatever truths are evident.

Thinking back on it, many things in my life may have been different if people had actually told me the truth as opposed to trying to protect my feelings. This isn't a "blame game" more the acknowledgement that if people are unwilling to be honest with you, they do not respect you.

I think someone respects me when they care what I think of them. If they treat me in a way that shows clearly they couldn't care less to be found mean, selfish, annoying, hurtful, ridiculous, stupid in my eyes, then it means they don't respect me. People respect you when they think they might need you and that your favors are not unconditional, must be earned by giving a positive impression of themselves to you.

Due to my aspie traits and NTs' wrong interpretation of them, most people are totally sure without a doubt that my favors are unconditional and that I'll give my all and allow to walk all over me to anyone however badly they treat me. Invariably, they're shocked with surprise when they find out they'd been wrong.

I even had a male couple, neighbors, laugh at me a couple months ago and say "You'd never dare go to the police, anyway". They were SHOCKED with surprise when, the following day, the Police called them to interrogation for aggressive intimidation and sexual harrassment of me. They had been totally certain that I was someone they didn't need to respect. NOW they respect me. I need the Police often because, as I said, due to my misinterpreted aspie traits, I don't command respect instinctively from people.

Exactly. This is essentially what it comes down to. In the case of NTs, I would also add that they take their cues from each other regarding whom to respect. So respect most often stems from 1) selfishness and 2) a pathetic need for social approval.