Two of my closest friends just blocked me on Facebook...

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chickenspice
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09 Jul 2012, 6:28 pm

Screw it. I'd just move on and find new friends. If I had a "friend" who suddenly blocked or unfriended me on facebook, then I wouldn't even try to talk to that person again.



thewhitrbbit
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09 Jul 2012, 10:53 pm

chickenspice wrote:
Screw it. I'd just move on and find new friends. If I had a "friend" who suddenly blocked or unfriended me on facebook, then I wouldn't even try to talk to that person again.


Even if your actions led to the blocking? You can't expect friends to be a door mat or not have their own feelings.

And as one poster said, maybe he was in a bad mood.

I can def think of days when I'm happy and joking and can laugh at myself. I can also think of days when if someone said the same thing, I'd be pissed off and not in the mood.

I do believe that the "friend" should have said something to the effect of "please stop"



chickenspice
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10 Jul 2012, 7:42 am

thewhitrbbit wrote:
chickenspice wrote:
Screw it. I'd just move on and find new friends. If I had a "friend" who suddenly blocked or unfriended me on facebook, then I wouldn't even try to talk to that person again.


Even if your actions led to the blocking? You can't expect friends to be a door mat or not have their own feelings.

And as one poster said, maybe he was in a bad mood.

I can def think of days when I'm happy and joking and can laugh at myself. I can also think of days when if someone said the same thing, I'd be pissed off and not in the mood.

I do believe that the "friend" should have said something to the effect of "please stop"

Nope, sorry. I know people have their feelings and sometimes get into fights, but still, taking it to the point that you delete someone on facebook is just pathetic and weak. To me, getting unfriended means the person does not want to reconcile or make things better. The last thing I'd do is to beg someone to friend/accept me again. Super needy in my opinion.



viv
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12 Jul 2012, 3:39 am

Summer_Twilight wrote:
That is odd. If that is the case, then they really were not your friends to begin with.


I agree with this one - if a friend means something to you, you would not be so quick to let them go. These do not seem like good friends, or as hurtful as it may sound, perhaps they did not see you as a good friend. Either way what is clear from their actions is that they do not value your friendship they way you do their friendship.

In my experience there's very little use in trying to reconsile a relationship if the other party has decided they want to end it. I find I go out of my way and make poor decisions to trying and fix friendships that might not be worth the time or effort and are in many cases not fixable. Sometimes it's better just to walk away from a bad situation.

People have many, varied motivations and it's not always possible, even for NTs to figure each other out. Trying to figure out their motivations without any clues might only lead to overthinking and false conclusions.

I think the best thing to do is try and focus on your other friends, the ones who do want you around. If these don't exist then try and make friends. Also, think back over the conversation, or try and talk to them and go over what may have gone wrong, and try and avoid similar circumstances in the future.



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28 Jul 2012, 6:51 am

I've learned after several decades of this happening to me that if someone cuts contact with you for ONE instance of hurt feelings, it means they were looking for an excuse to cut contact or didn't value the friendship anyway. That is, unless the one thing you did was horrible like stealing, killing, something seriously illegal, harming their family, etc.


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namaste
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28 Jul 2012, 12:54 pm

already they find us weird, odd and eccentric
and at that moment they felt that you crossed the limits
so they blocked you out.
understanding NT perception is hard for us. :oops:


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Foxface
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01 Aug 2012, 2:55 am

I get this all the time, and don't know why. People who actually talk to me, without warning, they hate me, even though I have down nothing to them.

Most of them are NT's who are judgmental and stuff.



steviewonderau
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01 Aug 2012, 3:04 am

No big loss. You do not need friends like that.



CrazyStarlightRedux
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01 Aug 2012, 3:22 am

AJCoyne wrote:
With no indication and without telling me why. We were actually talking and joking, then the next minute both of them blocked me. I don't understand why. Is this normal? Or some sort of joke? If so I'm not laughing :(

Advice? :(


How do you know that they blocked you?

I would ask them in person first before jumping on the assumption that they have and if they have, why not just tell you to your face?


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Amethyst
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01 Aug 2012, 11:54 am

CrazyStarlightRedux wrote:
AJCoyne wrote:
With no indication and without telling me why. We were actually talking and joking, then the next minute both of them blocked me. I don't understand why. Is this normal? Or some sort of joke? If so I'm not laughing :(

Advice? :(


How do you know that they blocked you?

I would ask them in person first before jumping on the assumption that they have and if they have, why not just tell you to your face?


I think you can usually tell if a person blocks you on Facebook. You click on the name, but it comes up as being unavailable.
It's confusing when things like that happen. I can't really offer any advice because it's happened to me, and I don't know why it happens.
There was one guy who blocked me, but that didn't worry me too much, as he never seemed to have a nice thing to say about anyone but himself. Strange that he worked as a professional counsellor!
Another guy blocked me who seemed like such a nice person, so I must have upset him somehow. I kept going over my last message and wondering what it was in that message that caused him such offence to press that block button, never figured it out.
Another time, a really nice person I had heaps in common with, simply wrote said to me I won't be hearing from him any more. Oh well, least he said.
Wish I had something more helpful to say to you AJCoyne, but don't blame yourself, it's just the way some people seem to be for some reason, but thankfully not everyone.