When did u/parents knew u had AS or autism?

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daydreamersworld
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10 Aug 2012, 5:05 pm

Hi, I'm new to this site. I came across it because i felt lonely and wanted to be able to relate to others with aspergers as well.
When did u or your parent/gaurdians realized you had a problem? What kinds of odd things or behaviors were u doing that maybe typical kids your age were not doin to make them aware and get you diagnosed?

For me, personally i was 6. My parents thought i was just different. I was very shy..had a few melt downs here and there mostly when i was younger. I was more interested in bein by myself when i was in school. i longed to have friends everyonce in awhile but couldnt relate to them or didnt know how to approach them. Also i was very neat and had a few gross motor skill problems. So yeah thats basically it. I guess from my parents point of view i was getting odder and odder each year.



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10 Aug 2012, 5:13 pm

My parents should have noticed when I was around 6 years old and my teacher complained to them about my constant tapping. I was also put in several special classes and my 5th grade teacher called my parents in for a conference to explain that I was taking apart electronic devices and using the parts to build different devices. She told them that they should try to focus my attention on engineering...but my parents were abusive and neglected me (they wouldn't take me to the dentist or eye doctor), so there was no way that they were going to pay attention to something like this. They didn't notice that I dressed like a boy and wore air fresheners to school and instead of doing something about my social issues, they told me that I'm embarrassing and obnoxious and asked me not to speak.

Now I'm a 27 year old adult and I came to learn that I married a person with Aspergers. While trying to understand exactly what that means, I realized that THAT is what's been "wrong" with me for my entire life. I too have AS!



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10 Aug 2012, 5:15 pm

They don't know; they've seen tell-tale signs that I'm "different", though and have previously stated that I probably have ADHD.



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10 Aug 2012, 5:19 pm

My parents didn't realise that I had social problems, despite me acting out and bringing up concerns with them at home. They saw that I was smart, and so they thought I didn't need help with school or have any problems. They were convinced that I may have dyslexia, since they thought my dad has it. But when I heard about AS and told them I might have it, they said that I "don't, because people with autism can't speak." So, I've felt different as far as I can remember, but didn't know that it was clinical until high school, and I would look up disabilities to find out what it could be. But my parents I guess still think I'm socially normal and deny my diagnosis. They still think that if anything, I'd have a learning disability that others in my family have, not AS.



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10 Aug 2012, 7:11 pm

My mother tells me -- remember that I'm now 52 years old -- she has suspected that there was something "wrong" with me since I was a teen, and maybe earlier, but she's not sure. Some of the clues were poor self-esteem, poor hygiene, inability to make friends, avoidance/fear of people in general and self-imposed isolation, my nose in a book all the time, and my rocking back and forth -- she thought it was a sign that I was "crazy" (I still do that, btw). Also, I had a habit -- a "stimming" of some sort I suppose now -- of tearing paper into little bits. There were little piles all over the house. She couldn't understand how I could be such a complete slob in my housekeeping, but my books and records were in perfect categorical order. I ended up in group therapy my senior year of high school, which actually did me no good. All they said was that I needed some confidence. This was 1978 -- YEARS before AS was made an official diagnosis.

We've just pegged in the last few days that AS is likely my problem. Since studying more about AS, she has noticed other things as well, such as walking on my toes as a child. She says that I did that, but thought all little kids did. I was also one of those "little professor" kids -- too smart for my own good, and never really seemed like a kid. We have never been able to figure out why I was teased so badly in school -- I was told by my classmates that I had "Cindy Germs". I wonder now if AS was a lot more noticeable than any of us were aware.



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10 Aug 2012, 8:40 pm

We didn't..we realised he was 'quirky', was incredibly good in certain areas and struggled in others and that he had trouble with social skills and friendship as well as an obsessive interest in certain things but honestly, my knowledge of Aspergers was shady at best and the idea that he had autism never crossed my mind.
His kinder teacher told us that he should see a speech therapist because of his social skills and he had developed a stutter and so off we went, and although no one used the word 'autism' because in Australia unless you are qualified to make a diagnosis, most people won't even say the word so they both kept saying he needs to see a paediatrician or psychologist.
He was diagnosed when he was 4, almost 5 and it was like a bolt out of the blue.


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10 Aug 2012, 8:51 pm

I noticed my daughter was different from the very beginning, though I didn't know in what way at first. She just seemed...different. She didn't point, didn't coo or babble, didn't look at me when I nursed her. By the time she was one and not even making noises, I was not surprised. It just seemed inline with her development...on it's own timeline. At 2 she was still not babbling, but made noises that sounded...feral. We wondered if she was hard of hearing and had her tested and she was not. Autism did not occur to me (probably denial, really) because she seemed so happy and she clearly loved her brother. Those two things made me totally dismiss her headbanging, meltdowns, lack of speech, non-response to her name...everything else. She was happy and she loved her brother, so I thought we were in the clear. When her pediatrician first suggested that I bring her to a neurologist for an evaluation, I said to myself "of course she is autistic!" and as soon as I told her dad, he also immediately accepted it, even before diagnosis. I think it was something we both knew on a subconscious level and when the ped put the word in the air, it somehow gave our psyches permission to recognize what we already knew.

My son was my first born. He hardly said anything until he was about 18 months old, but by the time he was 2.5, he spoke like a kindergartener. He had all kinds of "weird" traits. He crawled on one knee and one foot. He could not walk on unfamiliar stairs. He was always "on"--constant movement, constant talking. In pre-k they told me he was very socially immature, but told me not to worry. He was young for his grade and so smart. In kindergarten, his teacher's tune changed. He was becoming very intrusive and appeared to lack awareness that he was annoying the other kids. He would get revved up and sometimes not be able to stop himself until he went into full meltdown mode. He has always had a really, super sweet personality, so people have generally been patient with him. 1st grade continued to be tough, but we made it through. But by 2nd grade, the gap between his social skills and those of his peers was painfully obvious, even to those who previously reassured me that he'd catch up just fine. I found a really good pediatric neurologist who specializes in neurobehavioral issues (ASD, ADHD, OCD, TS, etc). He pretty much immediately recognized his extreme ADHD and also recognized a number of spectrummy traits and eventually settled on NVLD. He was 7 at the time. His sister had been diagnosed for 2 years at that point.

My parents never noticed there was anything "different" about me. After my son was dxd with ADHD, my mom immediately recognized I had ADD as a kid. But back then she had no access to information and thought ADHD was something only boys had.


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daydreamer84
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10 Aug 2012, 9:02 pm

Well, I have been diagnosed with AS and severe Nnonverbal learning disorder so some of my issues that were noticed were NVLD things. My mom noticed something was wrong with me when I was 2 or 3 because the preschool teacher told my mom I was always off in my own little world and she felt the same thing. Also I stimmed a lot even at that age, walking in circles talking to myself , reciting books my mom just read to me and scrunching up my face like a bunny rabbit and watching a string that I dangled in front of my face. I also asked repetitive questions a lot. The first week into junior kindergarten the teacher spoke to my mom and explained that she was very concerned about my because I exhibited some strange behaviors (constant stimming), had some obvious motor skills problems when going on the little bicycles etc and had a lot of trouble with things like drawing (spatial issues due to the NVLD) and that I seemed to often be unaware of the other children (let alone interacting with them) and my environment. The teacher arranged for me to have a sensory/motor evaluation at north york general hospital. My mom asked a neurologist who came to speak with her if he thought I was autistic (this was 9 years before the AS diagnosis was introduced) and he said "no definitely not, she speaks, she speaks well". The neurologist did say I needed "counseling" and "help with social skills" and "a tutor" and an occupational therapist because he identified a number of motor skills problems I had. A few years later I was assessed by an educational psychologist who gave me the diagnosis of NVLD. I kept being taken to different psychologists for "social and emotional problems" for years and I did social skills groups at the learning disabilities association. Then when I was 13 (almost 14) I was assessed by my school psychologist and she sent me to a doctor who specializes in anxiety disorders (because I clearly had anxiety). The anxiety therapist asked my mom if she thought my problem was "developmental" and sent my mom to a therapist who specialized in AS.....then I was diagnosed with AS at 14. I had some pretty obvious symptoms, it stated in my records all through primary school that I was "in my own little world" had trouble with "changes in routine" and "strange behaviors" and also that I had trouble with the pother children and they used to tease me a lot. I also did the class policeman thing where I loudly told the other kids the rules and wandered out of the lunchroom with hands over ears because it was too noisy and crowded. However some of my characteristics didn't fit....I did have good reading comprehension for example. Also my "special interest" if I had one would have been reading fiction and imaginary play based on the books, then imaginary play based on other things.....but it was always solitary imaginary play and I did it constantly......just not a collecting/ cataloging info kind of special interest. My mom also said that looking back she remembers that I had really rigid posture as a baby (infant) when being held and didn't 'mold to her arms", and I didn't smile and look at her as much as my sister but she didn't think much about it at that age.

WOw I wrote a lot! People could tell I was autistic when I was a kid....I wasn't the quiet, shy, obedient type......the loud obnoxious squeaky wheel gets the grease I guess. :)



Chapelo
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10 Aug 2012, 10:24 pm

I don't think my parents ever knew what to look out for. They just thought I was an odd child. Strangely, none of my teachers growing up ever thought I had ASD; they too thought I was just quirky and aloof.

I had suspected for years, but I didn't find out I had Asperger syndrome until I was 24. I told my parents soon afterward, and my dad said "Well, now it makes sense that you got so interested in those different subjects as a kid." I guess I can't really fault my parents, because they did try, and were very patient with me.

The funny part is, about two months after I got my diagnosis, my mom went to see a psychiatrist for persistent temper problems, and she too was diagnosed with Asperger syndrome. Guess I know where it came from.



Last edited by Chapelo on 10 Aug 2012, 10:47 pm, edited 2 times in total.

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10 Aug 2012, 10:30 pm

Officially diagnosed this year, but suspected it for 10 years. I recently found out that father refused to get me tested for autis as a child after it was recommended that i get that.



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10 Aug 2012, 11:54 pm

They found out when I was 12. I was labeled as being autistic in my toddler hood but they didn't buy it. But I lost the label anyway when I was older. They just called it autistic behavior or characteristics. Then it was just communication disorder. My mother always knew I had something but didn't know what. My speech therapist was the first to bring up AS to my parents when I was in 5th grade. Then next it was my psychologist in 6th grade. The other labels I had didn't seem to fit. Then I was taken to a psychiatrist who specialized in ASD and he diagnosed me with AS.


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benr3600
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11 Aug 2012, 2:44 am

This thread made me realize maybe my mother knew that I has ASD, and just never told me, thinking something like "if he never knows, he has no incentive to not be normal, therefore he might be normal." When I was about 13 she insisted that I became a "friend" of her friend's autistic son. Obviously, my response was "out of all the people on Earth, why would you choose ME to try to befriend an autistic kid? I can't even make real friends." Who knows, maybe that would have been my first "real" friend like the severely autistic kid who actually acknowledged Dr. House in the "Lines in the Sand" episode, or at least confirmed a suspicion she had.



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11 Aug 2012, 4:29 am

They knew when I figured it out for myself and told them at age 22.


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11 Aug 2012, 7:34 am

My parents knew there was something wrong when I very first started school at 4 years old. I was a typical toddler, didn't have any odd behaviours enough to be signifficantly noticed and concerned about, and I was even average with interaction with other toddlers at preschool (a bit shy but a lot of toddlers are, it wasn't anything to note about). But when I started school, everything changed - on my first day I was suddenly all frightened and misbehaved terribly and the teachers and my parents were worried and didn't know why I was behaving like this. Because I didn't have any noticeable speech delays or even any abnormal stims or anything like that, nobody knew what was wrong, and so I had to go to special clinics to see therapists and other doctors, and when I was 6 I got assessed for different things, then when I was 8 I had to be observed in school by a proffessionalist, then in the end they diagnosed me with high-functioning AS.


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lxuser
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12 Aug 2012, 11:41 pm

My mum thought there was always something odd about me, she suspected it was something on the autism spectrum. At age 11 I was diagnosed with high functioning autism, and then later at age 14 the diagnoses was changed to AS.



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12 Aug 2012, 11:55 pm

Several members of my family noticed something unusual about me but when I was very young Asperger's wasn't widely known about so I was never checked. I *always* knew something was VERY different about me but I particularly noticed once I got to about age 18. That was the point at which I had the epiphany that there was a whole book of unwritten rules and unspoken language which everyone else knew about but I didn't. I still didn't make any connection to Asperger's until this year because I just didn't know about it in great depth. before then I had heard stereotypes and met a couple of aspies who outwardly show it much more than me so I really didn't believe that I could be an aspie too. My problems were always just put down to anxiety and depression. Then this year I met somebody who very much reminded me of myself about 10 years ago before I learned how to sorta recognise a couple of the more important social cues (knowing when to stop talking and knowing when people are bored with me/want me to leave). So I went and read about Asperger's in great depth and was really shocked to find that people's experiences pretty much exactly described my life. *Everything* about me makes sense looked at in this way when nothing very much did before. So within two days of reading about it properly I made a doctor's appointment, we explained why we thought this to the gp and in less than 5 minutes I got a referral to see the local consultant who deals with learning disabilities in adults!

tldr version: My family noticed something different as a kid but we didn't properly make the aspie connection until this year. I'm 29 now.