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OlivG
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13 Aug 2012, 5:35 am

Do neurotypicals do this often? Like trying to establish a social pecking order. I learned that if you correct them, they will often assume that you are trying to prove your superiority or something.

I noticed some annoying things about my friend. He would often dismiss my scientific-research based bits of knowledge and instead aggressively emphasize his own "life experiences" and assumptions. Even despite this he actively keeps contact and wants to spend time with me, but at the same time I get the feeling that he doesn't want me to be his equal.

I don't remember running into this sort of behavior very often, probably because most of my other friends are more intovert/AS-featured.



SteffiTheSmile
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13 Aug 2012, 6:14 am

This is true, I spend my time studying things like social ranking ect.

Eg. when there's an argument going on, and person A. has run out of things to say, they'll start correcting the other persons spelling, and grammar.


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put
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13 Aug 2012, 7:06 am

People are afraid of losing face, I guess. And admitting you were wrong is apparently a sign of weakness. Just hit the other guy in the face and walk away. Everyone will know you were right all along.



Lucywlf
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13 Aug 2012, 10:10 am

I certainly have noticed that.

One woman is actively pecking away at me, saying everything I like is "stupid". It's becoming a bit of a farce, actually.



Colinn
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13 Aug 2012, 10:19 am

Just to be clear, this is definitely not strictly NT behavior. My brother is also diagnosed and he pretty much always has the need to be right about everything. But I do relate to this as in the social world many people do seem to be very opinionated and think they are superior to those outside their groups. I find this kind of ignorance and pretentious nature to be rather annoying and exhausting to deal with. Know when to pick your battles though as some people simply will not listen, no matter how much facts you give them. I guess for some ignorance is bliss.



okie
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13 Aug 2012, 5:43 pm

It took me a long time to figure out that seeking out the truth in all matters at all times and holding everyone to it isn't always the best thing, or even socially acceptable. I had to figure out that most interpersonal social interaction in a group is based on a complicated network of socially accepted falsehoods and status quo.



AftertheFall
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14 Aug 2012, 8:03 pm

Humans wish to gain domination over other humans and this simple facet of existence is the driving force behind many. This facet is not confined to simply NTs for it affects me heavily I do not need to be right all the time but I do need to be in control and to maintain control I need to appear as “right” as possible.



ardentauthor
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14 Aug 2012, 8:29 pm

It's human nature, just more obvious in NTs. In evolution, the best are those that survive...so we all want to be the best, and feel threatened when we are not.



GiantHockeyFan
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15 Aug 2012, 9:03 am

OlivG wrote:
Do neurotypicals do this often? Like trying to establish a social pecking order. I learned that if you correct them, they will often assume that you are trying to prove your superiority or something.


LOL! Take a look at my last thread in the general discussion. I had a run in at softball about rules and have now realize a week later it likely had NOTHING to do with a rulebook. He is a 'social Don Juan' at the top of the 'pecking order' and I inadvertently came across as challenging him on it by proving he was wrong. If it were the other way around, I would be very thankful to be proved wrong and would make the correction but I'm quickly realizing people (more specifically men) like me are few and far between.

I could write a novel on how many times people have gotten downright irate with me when I point out that they are wrong with proof like a rulebook, formula, etc. and I'm anything but rude, aggressive or hostile. I forget that many people prefer silly games to truth.

Some people still wonder why I prefer being around children, babies and seniors!



thewhitrbbit
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15 Aug 2012, 10:50 am

Every living thing does this.

It's much, much more pronounced in pack animals and social primates, but even solo animals like cats when they form colonies will have a pecking order.

Survival instincts, the leader of the pack gets the best food and the best mating rights.