It's hard to look at attractive women. (PLEASE HELP)

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JKDavitz
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31 Aug 2012, 9:58 pm

Whether it's in my everyday life, or even in fictional material, it has become increasingly painful to look at attractive women most of the time. I guess my level of romantic frustration has just reached this point. I just wish that I had no romantic or sexual attraction whatsoever, just so it would all be easier. Does anyone else ever feel like this? What do I do?



BigBossMSF
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31 Aug 2012, 10:38 pm

JKDavitz wrote:
Whether it's in my everyday life, or even in fictional material, it has become increasingly painful to look at attractive women most of the time. I guess my level of romantic frustration has just reached this point. I just wish that I had no romantic or sexual attraction whatsoever, just so it would all be easier. Does anyone else ever feel like this? What do I do?


Why is it painful? Do you associate beautiful women with feelings of rejection or something?



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01 Sep 2012, 12:22 am

Before my interest even kicked in, I was at a waterpark and saw a guy with a black eye and bloody nose being tended to by first aid. As I was passing by he told them "... all I did was say Hi to her..." From that I learned what happens when you try to talk to women when there's any other males around

Even if I see one alone who doesn't have anything shiny on her fingers I automatically reject her mentally. I've been on enough scouting expeditions to know I'll waste my time

The past few years I've heard about a '3 second rule' - for me it's been more of a '3 nanosecond rule'


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eric76
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01 Sep 2012, 12:56 am

I stare at beautiful women just like at anyone else.

If I'm sitting at a restaurant talking to someone, instead of making eye contact I'm usually looking past them without really paying any attention at what or who is in the direction that I'm looking. And who I'm looking at might be male, female, young, old, friend, relative, stranger, ..., it doesn't matter. It sure makes people nervous, though. It's not usual that people get up and move away from where I'm looking, but it does happen from time to time.

One time about 20 years ago I was in a very packed restaurant at lunchtime in Houston and I was just blankly staring into the crowd while waiting for my food. After a while, I noticed that some young woman (maybe 30) way across on the other side of the restaurant noticed me staring and she seemed to think I was interested in her. She shifted her position to where she could stare back better.

I figured that she must have been pretty hard up for a date although she was not bad looking. Or maybe someone else was staring at her and she was staring back at them, not me.



SickInDaHead
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01 Sep 2012, 1:01 am

JKDavitz wrote:
Whether it's in my everyday life, or even in fictional material, it has become increasingly painful to look at attractive women most of the time. I guess my level of romantic frustration has just reached this point. I just wish that I had no romantic or sexual attraction whatsoever, just so it would all be easier. Does anyone else ever feel like this? What do I do?



That's like the opposite reaction to looking at porn.



JKDavitz
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01 Sep 2012, 1:01 am

BigBossMSF wrote:
Why is it painful? Do you associate beautiful women with feelings of rejection or something?


more like felling of impossibility; a "want but cant have" type of scenario. I admit to being a bit of a hopeless romantic by instinct...and it sucks



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01 Sep 2012, 5:44 am

SickInDaHead wrote:
JKDavitz wrote:
Whether it's in my everyday life, or even in fictional material, it has become increasingly painful to look at attractive women most of the time. I guess my level of romantic frustration has just reached this point. I just wish that I had no romantic or sexual attraction whatsoever, just so it would all be easier. Does anyone else ever feel like this? What do I do?



That's like the opposite reaction to looking at porn.


Actually that's one reason why I don't don't look at porn. Idiots always say that guys who never get laid probably look at porn a lot. But it seems like it would be the opposite since viewing porn might make them very angry.

In other words never getting laid is why a guy WOULD NOT view porn.



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01 Sep 2012, 12:19 pm

JKDavitz wrote:
It's hard to look at attractive women. (PLEASE HELP)
What do I do?


I get hard too, normally I just beat off and have a nap



realitysucks
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01 Sep 2012, 4:32 pm

JKDavitz wrote:
Whether it's in my everyday life, or even in fictional material, it has become increasingly painful to look at attractive women most of the time. I guess my level of romantic frustration has just reached this point. I just wish that I had no romantic or sexual attraction whatsoever, just so it would all be easier. Does anyone else ever feel like this? What do I do?

Imagine how you are going to feel 20 years from now. I know this is going on deaf ears but now is the time to make changes.



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01 Sep 2012, 4:38 pm

Actually I can see why your afraid.
You are afraid that even if they are single, you fear that there will be a guy who will possibly beat you down.
Well first of all, if this guy violently attacked a man for just being polite and greeting his girlfriend. He should be in prison and spend time in anger management. Though that's only if the victim was telling the correct story.


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01 Sep 2012, 4:45 pm

Surfman wrote:
JKDavitz wrote:
It's hard to look at attractive women. (PLEASE HELP)
What do I do?


I get hard too, normally I just beat off and have a nap


:lol:


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Kaufmancab51
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01 Sep 2012, 7:46 pm

don't sweat the big guy beating you up, you'll be able to stand up again.

More than very least likely will you end up in a situation where you will face a gun to the head (again, very rare occasion does that happen to people).



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01 Sep 2012, 7:53 pm

JKDavitz wrote:
Whether it's in my everyday life, or even in fictional material, it has become increasingly painful to look at attractive women most of the time. I guess my level of romantic frustration has just reached this point. I just wish that I had no romantic or sexual attraction whatsoever, just so it would all be easier. Does anyone else ever feel like this? What do I do?

i actually have the same problem when i am attracted to someone (sometimes i have trouble looking directly at my boyfriend even after a year of dating). i have always tended to give off a "stay away" vibe because i will even turn my body completely away from the person if the attraction is too strong.

i don't have a solution for that. i just suffer with it, because i think it isn't really necessary to look at someone to much when words will suffice for communication. my ex-husband had social anxiety, and for our first real conversation we sat side-by-side and talked for hours without even looking at each other directly.


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JKDavitz
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01 Sep 2012, 9:22 pm

PastFixations wrote:
Actually I can see why your afraid.
You are afraid that even if they are single, you fear that there will be a guy who will possibly beat you down.
Well first of all, if this guy violently attacked a man for just being polite and greeting his girlfriend. He should be in prison and spend time in anger management. Though that's only if the victim was telling the correct story.


just to set the record straight, im not afraid of anyone beating the s**t outta me; personally, i think i could hold my own to a certain degree.

my problem is that i have zero luck with the ladies, and i hate it when im reminded of the unrequited and unreachable. unfortunately though. the world itself serves to remind me, just by mere circumstance. i just wish i could look at any woman and not feel a thing, to not have that void in my life...



JKDavitz
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07 Sep 2012, 7:26 pm

so i thought that i'd bring this topic back up to see if i can get anymore answers before it get buried...anyone...



exemplar
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07 Sep 2012, 7:45 pm

yah i hear you and it sucks!