Weekend question!

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We have a very tireding situation at the moment!
My oldest son, 9 yrs, is struggling to keep himself occupied during weekends.
We have started to write down a day schedule that worked a bit...
But he wants me or his dad to entertain him or spend alone time with just him....he has plenty of techno, lego, art stuff...you name it! MP3 player, books, exct. He gets bored easily and lack imagination and creative planning. Even when we help him plan and organize an activity, he doesnt want to do it alone....we need to partisipate! Both me and my husband is very tired and frustrated after yet another exausting weekend.
It seems as if he is jelous if we spend any time together or even talk to his little brother.
His little brother is starting to act out now because oldest always wants his way, when we go somewhere, it must be where he wants to go otherwise he sulks and makes it misrable for all. He chooses the activities, he chooses the restaurants, exct. It feels as if he is dictating all and every thing!
Yes, I know we mustn't give in , but its not nice to have a sulky, grumpy, tearfull, angry person arround......But I gues maybe thats the way to go?

How and what do you do to occupy your kids and keep every one happy during weekends or holidays?

He doesnt have enough friends to entertain him....we need to be his friends!
And no, there isnt somewhere we can drop him to stay while we do something else.....

I think it would be a good idea for your husband and you to alternate spending alone time with him so that you each get some break during the weekend and also spend time with your younger son. When our son was first diagnosed, we went overboard working exclusively with him, not realizing that it was adversely affecting our daughter. So, we either do everything together - AS A FAMILY - or it is all one-on-one with one parent spending time with one child, and the other parent spending time with the other child, then we switch. Our alone time as a couple is the evenings, after the kids are fast asleep.

We even include our daughter in son's weekend DTT. We also spend a LOT of time playing turn-taking games as a family. Maybe you can play board games like Monopoly or Scrabble together, so that all of you are involved, and it does not seem quite so much like 'work' to just keep one of you entertained. 

KWIM ? 

Also, when the weather is still good, try to get out and schedule outdoor activities as much as you possibly can. You are going to be cooped up indoors quite enough once winter gets here, so may as well enjoy the sunshine and pleasant weather while they still last ! ! This will also tire your kids out and get you some down-time when you get back home !

we've definitely felt that way with our ds (he's now 15) and I was usually the one that thought we had to "cater" to our son's needs/wishes...but my dh thought that was wrong...and in retrospect it was. He needed to know boundaries and learn that he was not in charge of the household. He needs to know that mom/dad get some downtime and some rest too.

Timers have always been helpful with our son. If we were to say "go play by yourself this afternoon" it would have been instant drama and anxiety. But if we said we are going to set the timer for 60 minutes and from 1:00-2:00 you are to do something on your own while mom/dad rest it let him know what was expected. Maybe after the time is up something fun could be planned.

You say he is bored easily and lacks imagination but maybe your're doing too much of the activity planning for him...so he sulks and is grumpy and angry? SO? don't feed into that and ignore it...he'll get over it. Maybe just sometimes sitting in a bedroom and not having anything to do will give him the push he needs to think of something on his own.

he also should know that everybody gets a turn in deciding the restaurant or activity......not just him...Maybe make out a schedule or make a game out of it...put names in a hat or put names of restaurants or activities in the hat and whatever gets picked is where you're going that day.

You are the parents! You can't let a 9 year old dictate to you. You get to set the rules and he will not like it but he'll figure out your game plan pretty quickly. My son could make life pretty difficult for us too if we gave in to all of his demands...but you have to be tough and consistent.

I also agree with HisMom in that you MUST(for your own sanity) get a break from your son every once in awhile...my son can drain the life right out of me at times - it can be as simple as getting in the car by myself and just driving around for a little while- but it helps refresh restore me....having and Aspie kid can be exhausting!

Good Luck!