Page 1 of 1 [ 10 posts ] 

libertyseas
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2012
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 18

02 Oct 2012, 9:12 pm

I am posting because I am looking for some positive words today. My daughter is ADHD diagnosed with some sensory challenges. Kindergarten was not fun...I finally had a psychologist do a psych ed and she recommended some items for her IEP. I also took her to an OT who had other reccommendations. This summer we moved to be closer to family who told me they would help. the help I need is school time help mostly. I can't run back and forth to the school and I explained this to my dad, he said he would help before I moved. After I moved he told me there would be no issues with the new school and came out of reitrement and started travelling to work. I am now over an hour away when I go to work so if I need to go to the school there is no more go drop off something or pick her up and drop her with a sitter quickly and then go back to work which I was able to do before, although it was costing me a fortune I didn't have to run away for the whole damn day. I've had to do this twice in the past week. After the first time my brother insisted we would put together a plan so I wouldn't have to - now today the school called me 4 times because she kept wetting herself. I texted my brother he said to wait a bit he would ask his boss but then never answered, later he said his phone was off and well, he is known to lie so I don't really believe it. I was trying to get there so fast because I waited so long for my brother I ran out of gas on the highway and hitch hiked to a gas station.

They are starting her IEP documentation stuff and sending it home in a couple weeks. Her emotions have been all over the roadmap lately so I thought I would do a trial with the ADHD medication and it was a very low dose but the before and after school daycare was reporting an over focus on things, they couldn't get her to switch tasks so the dr said I could stop it. I called the psychologist and have booked another appointment for counselling. My dad says that he has cancelled his work until Christmas and is coming home tomorrow afternoon.

I've been yelling a lot lately and I'm not at all. I also can't stop crying tonight. I worry because even though I've been at work almost 3 years I have to have difficult personal phone conversations in front of my co-workers in my open office. I have 9 months left of my probationary period in my new position and some of my workload was lightened recenty. Now I've been given an exciting project but it entails me to be about 3 hours drive from the school for a few days and I am scared. I'm a single mom, its my first good job and I don't want to lose it because I don't know if any other company would be as receptive to me as this one.

I dunno...I just want someone to say something positive tonight...



MountainLaurel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Age: 67
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,030
Location: New England

02 Oct 2012, 9:45 pm

Libertyseas, you'll pull through because you gotta. 8O

I don't know what kind of area you live in, but here in my condo complex there are a few reliable folks who can be relied upon to help in situations of need. Two are retired folks and one is an an at home mother; all drive and have their heads screwed on straight. These folks do errands for others in need. I always pay them for their time and that comes in handy for them in turn. Do you know anyone in your circle who might qualify similarly? Lots of folks are out of work and some of them are quite reliable.

All my best to you and keep up the good work.



Eureka-C
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Sep 2011
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 586
Location: DallasTexas, USA

02 Oct 2012, 10:46 pm

Hang in there.

Are there any school concerns that you can plan for?

Wet clothes = changes of clothes and a box of baby wipes

Lunch = extra money or a favorite snack packed away

Duplicate favorite objects so one always stays packed for school.

Also, one thing I learned as a teacher was that just because I ask or allow a child to call and ask for something doesn't mean I will get it right away. Also, parents can't and don't always come get there children at the whim of the school in the middle of the day.

Again, hang in there.



libertyseas
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2012
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 18

03 Oct 2012, 5:26 am

Mountail Laurel - I just moved so finding people is a bit more difficult. There were a couple neighbours who stayed home at my last place but I could smell pot a lot at their house so I didn't like to leave my daughter there that much. I called my new neighbour yesterday but he didn't have his car his wife did, other people I kno ware usually committed during the day.

Eureka - I have sent extra changes of clothes with her but she was just through them yesterday. I am sending 4 changes of clothes in with her today. I'm trying to stop her from this new habit of going to the bathroom in her pants but it's hard. She goes weeks and weeks just fine and then not fine. Everyone asks me what we need to do like I have a majic cure for mental health in my back pocket I don't share with the world. I don't expect to have a lunch problem but I will put the cash in her bag.

I've tried not going to the school for stuff but they keep calling me, and then I feel like they are going to call CAS if I don't go and it makes me very anxious. I really just need to go to work, its my source of income but it is also a place I get some peace and to do the things I am interested in doing for a portion of my day so it upsets me when people seem to think I'm just hanging out waiting for an excuse to run away. I also told my boss that me running off would stop once I moved because my family told me they would help me and now it's just not looking good.

Ah well today is another day and dad said he is going to be back this afternoon. I just hope he isn't just saying that this time.



aann
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 19 Nov 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 486

03 Oct 2012, 6:09 am

Thanks for sharing. My heart goes out to you, and I'm praying for you.



Eureka-C
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Sep 2011
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 586
Location: DallasTexas, USA

03 Oct 2012, 2:15 pm

libertyseas wrote:
Mountail Laurel - I just moved so finding people is a bit more difficult. There were a couple neighbours who stayed home at my last place but I could smell pot a lot at their house so I didn't like to leave my daughter there that much. I called my new neighbour yesterday but he didn't have his car his wife did, other people I kno ware usually committed during the day.

Eureka - I have sent extra changes of clothes with her but she was just through them yesterday. I am sending 4 changes of clothes in with her today. I'm trying to stop her from this new habit of going to the bathroom in her pants but it's hard. She goes weeks and weeks just fine and then not fine. Everyone asks me what we need to do like I have a majic cure for mental health in my back pocket I don't share with the world. I don't expect to have a lunch problem but I will put the cash in her bag.

I've tried not going to the school for stuff but they keep calling me, and then I feel like they are going to call CAS if I don't go and it makes me very anxious. I really just need to go to work, its my source of income but it is also a place I get some peace and to do the things I am interested in doing for a portion of my day so it upsets me when people seem to think I'm just hanging out waiting for an excuse to run away. I also told my boss that me running off would stop once I moved because my family told me they would help me and now it's just not looking good.

Ah well today is another day and dad said he is going to be back this afternoon. I just hope he isn't just saying that this time.


I hope it works out for you too.

I wanted to add though that when I was a young teacher without any children, I just called parents and asked them to take care of this or that... I didn't realize they saw it as a "must" that had to be "now" until one parent told me. I learned as a teacher to let the parents know if it needed to be done now... sometime today... could wait until tomorrow... sometime this week... or if you have a chance great, but if you don't thats okay. I learned as a parent to ask directly the very same thing if I was not told otherwise. I would try to do it with a positive lilt... like "I'm at work right now and would be glad to come down and take care of that, but is there any way it can wait? maybe later today? tomorrow? on my day off?" then "thank you so much for your patience in this... you have been a lifesaver"



Eureka-C
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Sep 2011
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 586
Location: DallasTexas, USA

03 Oct 2012, 2:18 pm

oh... something a friend of mine did. When she had to run off from work a lot because of a child with health problems. She kept a log of when she left the office and returned, and work done from home with a time log, and times she came in early and stayed late. That way, when the other workers complained, the boss was not caught in the middle, he could clearly point out that time-wise and work-wise she was doing her fair share and he had no problem with it, because she was so reliable.



libertyseas
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2012
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 18

03 Oct 2012, 7:52 pm

Eureka - they called me 4 times asking me to come because they absolutely could not find extra clothes - I asked them if it was possible to ask another student if they had extra but they said no, I asked if there was a lost and found with anything and no. I usually pack in the front of her bag but I must have moved it to another bag. I told them it was going to take me 2 hours to get there and they said well you should have made other arrangements. I called 6 people closer to her noone answered and my brother did his irritating thing.

They even called me on my cell when I was almost there to make sure I was coming. I was not happy.

I used to be 15 minute drive from her old school. they weren't as good at this school though and I moved further away cause my dad insisted I would not have to be doing this type of thing anymore since he could handle it.



libertyseas
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

User avatar

Joined: 23 Aug 2012
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 18

03 Oct 2012, 7:53 pm

Thanks aann



Eureka-C
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Sep 2011
Age: 47
Gender: Female
Posts: 586
Location: DallasTexas, USA

06 Oct 2012, 7:42 am

libertyseas wrote:
Eureka - they called me 4 times asking me to come because they absolutely could not find extra clothes - I asked them if it was possible to ask another student if they had extra but they said no, I asked if there was a lost and found with anything and no. I usually pack in the front of her bag but I must have moved it to another bag. I told them it was going to take me 2 hours to get there and they said well you should have made other arrangements. I called 6 people closer to her noone answered and my brother did his irritating thing.

They even called me on my cell when I was almost there to make sure I was coming. I was not happy.

I used to be 15 minute drive from her old school. they weren't as good at this school though and I moved further away cause my dad insisted I would not have to be doing this type of thing anymore since he could handle it.


How very frustrating. It is so frustrating as a parent when you are doing everything and people are so judging and have no understanding. I hope your dad comes through and is there for you.