My dad thinks I am a ret*d.

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I think that could fall under verbal/psychological abuse. It's definitely not acceptable. The hard truth may be that your dad has issues that he is in denial about and is unlikely to accept you unless he addresses his problems first ...which may never happen.

Your best bet would be to simply stop seeing him altogether. I get the impression you'd rather he be a part of your life, but in a positive way. That, however, isn't your choice, it's his. TBH it doesn't sound like he's worth your time.