Getting bored with people

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Okay. So this is something that I've always felt really, really guilty about and I want to know if anyone else does it. If I get to know someone well enough, I lose interest in them. I simply don't care about what they have to say and I don't want to expend the energy required to socialize with them. (Wow, that sounds terrible), Sometimes it's just for a week and sometimes it's a permanent thing. No matter what they say or do, I get impatient and bored....

So... anyone else?

I know that feel, except with a friend of mine who is literally a clone of myself. I don't really need to spend any energy when I'm with him, we even have the same thoughts a lot of the time (though he's an MCDD while I'm just an AS).

Yes. Though this is so consistent in me that I don't want to know anyone well enough either.

Yeah. I have a really good friend who is understanding. She accepts that sometimes I need a break from her and she doesn't seem to take it personally (I think). I can spend much more time with her than other people because she can follow my conversation style and she doesn't make me perform tiresome social niceties.

Not really. But I do get bored with some things that people often talk about, like ''oh did you see that television programme last night....?'' and, ''oh I saw this really gorgeous bird....'' (not meaning a girl, I mean the actual animal, I find birds boring), and, ''so who got the most drunk at the bar last night?'' I also find it boring when people say something in every little detail; ''yesterday I got up at about half 8....no, about 25 to 9 I got up....it was quite dull in the room, well not that dull because it was morning but dull enough to put the light on, not the lamp but the actual light, so that I could see what I was doing when I got dressed....well I went into the bathroom first, then at about....err.....10 to 9 I came back into the bedroom, no that was 5 to 9 because I had a wash, a strip wash in the sink, and....'' ohh, just get to the bloody point!! !

OK I did go a little off-topic but that's what bores me about some people. Obviously a lot of people don't talk about things in every little detail but that is a personality trait what some people can have, Aspie or not.

I do hate it when I point out something boring about what people are saying, and then they turn to me and yell, ''so you want us to talk about your obsessions then, do you?!'' I hate that because that's not what I even had in mind.

This has only happened to me with acquaintances, people I'm not that interested in to begin with.

I find that some people have such predictable responses to life and situations, they can be boring to me. I mean, it's like I can predict exactly what they'll say from moment to moment. I don't find them interesting to begin with, and we don't become friends. So there's no real guilt involved.

I try to be nice, polite when I encounter them, but I'm not going to take the relationship any deeper. They usually seem bored with me as well.

On the rare occasions when someone like this seems to want a friendship with me, I try to put them off nicely, mainly with a polite "no" to invitations, and by avoiding them for a while. They usually take the hint. At that point, because there is no friendship yet, it doesn't seem to hurt feelings.

I have at times made the mistake of doing this, though, and later finding they were interesting to me, more so than I realized at first. So I do sometimes regret putting them off. I've learned to give people more chances to reveal themselves before I write them off.

Last edited by SpiritBlooms on 23 Nov 2012, 1:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Meh this may be normal with NT's except they are able to avoid over exposure to their friends.

I did feel kind of guilty about it at first, but then i really stopped caring and it was a huge relief. I even doubted if I am not a sociopath. I am not. At least I hope, because I am about to be diagnosed. But I believe I am an Aspie. I like being WITH people, like being in their presence, love observing them, but I don´t like very much to interact with them. It is because they say something different than they really think. I don´t like it. That´s why I don´t like most people. But I don´t hate them, not at all. I like some and don´t like other. That´s all.

When I was younger, I had similar experiences.
Once I got to know people well enough, I realised they were not interesting enough and lost interest in them.
Over the years, however, I learned how to tell if people are interesting quite quickly.
Therefore, over the years, I didn't bother to get to know about 99% of the people I met, because I immediately realised it would be a waste of time for me.
I did stick with the 1% which seemed interesting enough to me.
With the few people who are interesting to me, I keep in touch for years upon years, without ever loosing interest in them.

I feel about the same whenever I go to Autscape, in which about 90% of the participants don't seem interesting to me. Yet, I absolutely love and adore some of the remaining 10% of people who normally come to Autscape, some of whom I've kept in touch with for over six years now.

Well, I'm still pretty young I guess (18 ). I'm getting a bit better at sorting out who is interesting from who is not but this is still a problem. For the last 6 months or so, I've completely avoided making new friends and have been much happier for it.



I'm working on the not caring. Sociopaths are actually very good at reading people's body language and motivations/thoughts (apparently) they just don't care about the person. Kind of like the opposite of AS in my opinion... I like being around a few people, so long as I don't have to talk to them. When I do feel social, I enjoy watching people interact, just not participating.

"Bored with people" is my default state.

ok, since you went first, and admitted it, I will also admit it. Yes. It is true, I do this.

I'm easily bored with people. I find myself very inquisitive, (yet I have a double standard hipprocracy of being reserved odd) and finding much information about a person. Usually on my "mini-series" like adventures (small short term, programs and exchanges), where I socialize with my as Tyler Durden character puts it "single serving" friend. And we occasionally communicate over facebook. I honestly feel bad about this... For I have very little physical friends. I can assume that with a girlfriend I would suffer this same problem.

Ditto. Verbatim.

Thank you OP - yours and the above.