Embrace routines or try to break them?

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I have been caught up in special routines--particularly around the foods I eat--for many years now. These bring me happiness; I am genuinely excited to wake up every morning and enjoy the texture and taste of my favorite breakfast, then lunch, then small selection of favorite dinners that I rotate through the week.

Of course, they can also be problematic, as it can be harder to travel and spend time with the family. I can certainly bring my favorite things along wherever I go but don't like to do so because it feels shameful--like I ought to try to do what everyone else does and be a little more relaxed. I've tried that and usually find myself depressed and longing for my usual foods. More specifically, I've tried flat-out leaving it all behind and attempting to just go with the flow and eat with everyone else on family vacations. And after the most difficult college semester of my life, during which I genuinely thought, "ANYTHING, including giving up my routines, would be better than this horrific mountain of stress," I thought I would come home on break and just happily get into the flow of a flexible, 'normal' eating pattern and that all of my routines would magically disappear because I was too busy being thankful that I survived school.

Well, they didn't. I came home at the beginning of the winter break, determined to 'turn my life around' and forced myself to avoid my dining routines for about a week. I immediately fell into a deep depression and, having succumbed to my routines again, am genuinely becoming happy again.

So I suppose the question is, do I need to fight my routines like a dangerous addiction, or should I accept them as a part of Asperger's (at least in my case) and a part of me? Should I strive to join in the group while on a trip, or instead be less shy about my habits and shamelessly partake in them?

I have tried breaking out of mine knowing they were holding me back. I guess that is what makes it OCD. I have gotten better at it but still have troubles. My husband has to help me with that.

I have OCD and AS and it is never easy to get
the balance right. It isn't just a simple fact
of going with what is life affirming over
what is life diminishing, as there are always
times to take risks and grow through the
pain of change routine and times when
calling on what works is just plain common sense.
Mindfulness practice helps me with this
on going discernment, like a dance teacher
accompanying and offering me tools and
strategies whereby I can put spacious
awarenes around a trigger/stimulus and
thus make more awake and conscious
choices.

Wishing you and everyone here well

I hate routine to the point that I sometimes hate life. Its all just one big routine

I find keeping to routine comforting if my morning routine is broken nothing will go right for the rest of the day.
I try not to be unduly disturbed when it is broken and will even enjoy the occasional spontaneous event when it happens.