Not fat, but not thin either

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I'm not technically in the overweight range, but I definitely have some extra fat on my body, I don't fit the skinny body type that almost all guys seem to find most attractive. I'm 5'3/5'4, 125-130 lbs and have a 32'' waist, which I get the impression is pretty bad. So when guys say they prefer thin girls, or girls who "aren't fat", I can't help thinking that this doesn't apply to me. Anyone else in the same boat?

I dont think there's anything wrong with it? A lot of people are not skinny, its just that media and society perfers skinny girls.

I haven't noticed that most guys prefer skinny girls. Just about all the guys I know have expressed a preference for curves.

^ Yeah, I haven't noticed a lot of those these days. Maybe in the '90s, when Kate Moss was famous and Anorexia and Bulimia were in fashion. A lot of people I know these days (particularly Mexicans, not being racist here, just an observation) are grossed-out by chicks who are "too skinny".

I personally have a penchant for low body fat percentage. But I don't think skinny girls are attractive, I think athletic girls are. Like Michelle Jenneke. Lean with some meat on her bones.

Yeah, I hear that a lot from guys: "I don't like skinny girls, but I like girls who are "slim" or "low body fat" or "athletic""--all of which means not me I don't blame the guys, they can't help what they're attracted to, I just wish I was more like that

I'm about your size, 5'4, 120 lbs and I think I have a lot of fat on me too. In fact I have a high body fat percentage (around 25~27%).
I want to drop 10 more pounds if not more. I just have to cut down on carbs. (so hard to do)
To me it's not about what men prefer. I want to be thin because I think thin people are attractive.

I used to be chubby. Then I started boxing and dropped to somewhere like 5% body fat. Just find a physical activity you enjoy, and where you can compete with yourself. Like those Crossfitter chicks who get really into it, and just happen end up looking really good in booty shorts.

"Dropping pounds" is all about just that: pounds. That doesn't count for anything, since you don't really know where the pounds come from. That's how wrestlers and boxers and MMA fighters can cut like 10% of their bodyweight on weigh-ins, then just put it back on for the fight. Don't get too caught-up on the pounds, they don't really mean anything (unless you're competing).

Also remember that you are born with a certain body type. Ectomorph (skinny), Mesomorph (normal), and Endomorph (chunky). Not only will an Endomorph trying to be an Ectomorph look unnatural, it will also be very difficult, since you are trying to break your body's natural state of equilibrium. Knowing your type will be beneficial though, so you will know what you are working with. All in all you will just have to learn to work with what you have.

It's not just Mexicans, it's Latinos in general.
And absolutely, most Latinos definitely do not like girls who are too skinny.

To the OP: I've seen pictures of you, you look great.
I wouldn't say that you were too overweight.

And it's not the "skinny body type" that most guys find attractive - that's just what the media feeds to the population.
In places that don't get the chance to get brain washed by the media, you will find that most guys prefer women who range from similar to yourself all the way to the skinny but not too thin type (much, much more normal than most models or actresses). You are definitely within that biological range that men find attractive.

Is this about how you feel about yourself, or about how you think other people see you?

I know the feeling. All of my life I've felt like no guy would ever love me. I'm a size 18/20. This is year I'm going to lose to a size 14 for personal reasons, but definatly not to attract men.

I just hate it when women use being plus-sized as an excuse to pig out and be unhealthy. Body image does not translate into food.

interesting thread, i remember reading that women think that most men like super-thin women because that's what the fashion magazines tell us, but that is not what men actually prefer. for some reason there is a disconnect between what we think they like, and what they actually like.

i have been a wide variety of weights and sizes since i was 18 years old (from underweight to morbidly obese), and for me the biggest factor in attracting men has been my level of self-confidence. i would say that my confidence was highest when i was at my heaviest, and it stayed about the same since i have lost some weight (i am about 175lb at 5'2" now). my self-confidence definitely translated into men also finding me more attractive. if i value my own self, other people value me more too.

i don't know if specific body types are that important for men as a group, but it can play a role individually. and if men are picking their favourite women's silhouettes out of a lineup, it's not the same as getting to know women ad appreciating them as a whole. preferences play a big role, but they don't seem to be absolute, maybe.

thick chicks are hawt!

I'm 5'4" and only managed to get into the high 130s by having an extremely strict diet and exercising my a$$ off every day. And there is nothing wrong with my metabolism? With moderate exercise I can maintain mid 160s, and no exercise, 170s. At my thinnest, my waist was 28"--that's the natural waist, a couple of inches under the underbust. I also think thin people are attractive, but oh, well. I'm off to spend the rest of my lunch break trudging around the parking lot.

I've been all sorts of weights. Being fat or thin, I don't notice any difference in how men treat me. The worst thing about being fat is how other women treat you, which is also the worst thing about being thin. When you're fat, thinner women look down on you (like my own sister does now). When you're thin, fat women resent you. Not all of them, of course. It's a very generalised pattern.

The size your are now will probably be the one that pleases other (heterosexual) women the most.

For lesbians and a bi women it's a bit different. I don't see other women as competition for men, so I don't care what weight they are. I am turned off by thin women, though. I like them larger than average, tbh. It's just an individual preference thing. I think that's how it is with straight men. Different men prefer different sizes, but they don't judge* a woman's status by her weight (like the media does), since they aren't in competition with women like straight women are...

*HOWEVER: anyone, regardless of gender or sexual preference, who is very influenced by the media will think that thinner is better. So it's complicated.

I'm around the same height and weight but I'm told that I'm curvy and guys like that. I don't see myself as fat, in fact far from it. I've tried to lose weight before and it just doesn't work so I figure that I can't be any lighter without starving myself and exercising too much, which I've done before and frankly it makes me feel worse about myself. You're in a healthy body weight range. Being healthy is what's most important.

In my opinion, most of the pressure to be thin comes from the fashion industry. Even someone in this thread alone mentioned Kate Moss, a fashion model, as part of the start of the "women must be thin" trend.

In a way, I can understand why. Thin women are easier to design for, no curves to work around. Thin women can wear a wider variety of styles and look good.

Since sex sells, it is simple for designers to use sex appeal to sell their clothes. Many designers are gay men and wouldn't have an idea of heterosexual males are attracted to in women anyway.

When you realize that what you're aiming for is a marketing ploy for designers that are too lazy to use any but the simplest bodies to design for, it may help you feel better about yourself. It did for me at least.

Ftr, I am overweight, close to obese. 5"6, ~180 lbs. I have guys telling me all the time that I am attractive and that they want to do unmentionable things to me. The large rear end that I hate because it won't fit into clothes is constantly described by my bf as "cute, nice, great, sexy" etc.

I think its BS that size 14 or 16 is 'plus size'! & these models in layne braynt or torrid still look skinny to me!! !& they call those women plus size!! UNBELEIVABLE!! ! BTW Yes im fat(190) 5'6 but not like alot of ppl i've seen... maybe its just were i live(or.) but i see ALOT of very obese women.& strangely lots of guys are attracted to me. I geuss its the big boobs cuz thats were most of it goes lol! But perferably i would like to have a body like a hip hop model with my waist 22 inches & nice round hips & butt at like 44 inches & ofcourse keep my boobs. lol! unrealistic? i dont give a f***! also i dont understand why guys like a victoria's secret looking type a girls who have like no curves & hardly eny boobs & why girls want to be that skinny i'll never understand. I figured every one would want/like a body like nicki minaj's or Ice t's wife coco's.