Page 1 of 7 [ 102 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 7  Next

Vincent287
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 19 Feb 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 40

27 Apr 2013, 6:09 am

I am so scared. I see all of these aspies talking about heartbreaks and rejection. VIRGIN AFTER VIRGIN! Sure I am only 15 but seriously! As I get older I will become one of them. Their is no calm way of putting this! Im screwed!

Close up to get a real good view, Im betting that the NTs will survive. If only I can get inside them!

heartbreak after HEARTBREAK and REJECTION AFTER REJECTION is all you aspies talk about. Now I am next...

I would give it five years until my peers reach their sexual prime and their social skills are fully developed while I stay in my room a virgin? Nothing I can do about it because Im an ASPIE!

THE RELATIONSHIPS I SEE EVERYDAY AT SCHOOL! They scar me ONE BY ONE as the NT rumors creep up to my ears about who said yes as I see relationships develop while I am too busy fighting this clown inside of me.

WHY ISNT THERE ANY ASPIE GIRLS?! YOU GUYS ARE ALL DUDES AND IT MAKES MY SITUATION WORSE. THERE ISNT ONE ASPIE GIRL WHO LIVES NEAR ME!

Im digging through all of these threads and ripping at the posts I stand upon. EVERYTHING NEGATIVE THAT YOU GUYS POST! EVERYTHING THAT I WILL FACE IN THE FUTURE!

in the end.......................
...............
..................
..................
................just bow down to the NTs...



Wolfheart
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,971
Location: Kent, England

27 Apr 2013, 6:23 am

You aren't screwed, I am on the spectrum, I am getting my own business off the ground doing what I love and getting paid for it and although I haven't had long term relationships but that's more due to me lacking emotional maturity, I have had intimate sexual encounters with women and I have learned what I am truly passionate about.

Want my advice? Get out of your house, do what you are passionate about? Do you like painting? playing an instrument? playing in a soccer/football team? Get out and take part in some activities. Join a gym, hit your muscles hard on a regular basis, find out what you want to do financially and in your career and focus on that.

Women didn't take your first step, society didn't take your first step, you did and you did it with or without their approval. So start to realize that you are a man of your own and only you can make your life as efficient as you want to.



Last edited by Wolfheart on 27 Apr 2013, 6:25 am, edited 1 time in total.

Vincent287
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 19 Feb 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 40

27 Apr 2013, 6:23 am

I just had to vent what I thought. I had to get that out of my head. Im sorry if this made me look stupid or something. Im just scared...



Wolfheart
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,971
Location: Kent, England

27 Apr 2013, 6:27 am

Stop letting society lead you, why do we follow the words of people we don't know without analyzing their logic? It's because of Fear. If we are alone we are taught that we are failures in life. Even if you are happiest being a man of your own and successful in your ventures, you're still called a failure by society.

Do what seems right for yourself. If you know that hanging out at bars on friday nights goes against your desires, DON'T DO IT! You hear on the news when bar fights happen or clubs get shot up all the time. Alot of those people were only there because there friends (society) said if they didn't go, they'd be disowned. But now some dude is in intensive care after being shot are beat-up and his friends (society) aren't around for him.



Wolfheart
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Feb 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,971
Location: Kent, England

27 Apr 2013, 6:34 am

Vincent287 wrote:
I just had to vent what I thought. I had to get that out of my head. Im sorry if this made me look stupid or something. Im just scared...


Exactly, you keep telling yourselves that and your plan to keep girls away from you will work perfectly. You guys waste so much time doubting yourselves, you could have used that time to actually talk to girls. When one girl doesn't give you the time of day, you move to the next and repeat.

How do you guys even know if you're ugly? Who told you? Did you talk to every girl in your area? No. You're all too happy to come up with excuses to avoid your insecurities about talking to girls. Just be yourself, be proud of who you are and stop seeking approval, you don't have to say you have had sex with 100's of girls or you are a star football player if you're not.



Vincent287
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 19 Feb 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 40

27 Apr 2013, 6:42 am

I go with what he said! :D



boywonder
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 1 Aug 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 114

27 Apr 2013, 6:54 am

Much of the dating negation is due to internet addiction. Heavy internet users could be resigned if older or hiding and in fear if younger
Your fears will hold you back more than anything.
Fears may or may not be based in reason, as an aspie, only you can decide if you should partner up

Fit and healthy people find mates much easier than unhealthy speciwomens



Highlander852456
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 1 Apr 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 301
Location: Bratislava

27 Apr 2013, 9:34 am

I choose to make decisions on basis of practicality. I think I have choosen not to be in relationship at the moment. I am however planning one in few months once I finish school and get a job. What is interesting is that many people think that autistic are all a like. Try to look at the problem from your own perspective. It is your personal life that matters.



feenie
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 24 Nov 2012
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 65

27 Apr 2013, 10:28 am

boywonder wrote:
Much of the dating negation is due to internet addiction. Heavy internet users could be resigned if older or hiding and in fear if younger
Your fears will hold you back more than anything.
Fears may or may not be based in reason, as an aspie, only you can decide if you should partner up

Fit and healthy people find mates much easier than unhealthy speciwomens
There's probably a good reason why so many people are addicted to the internet. Even when I am out and about socially, I find myself playing around with my iPhone because social interaction to me is largely a bore. I have been going out every weekend since January 2012. Save for one weekend. If I don't go out this weekend, this will be just my second weekend in 15 months+ where I haven't went out. I'm sick and tired of putting myself out there just because that's the thing that you are supposed to and because no woman wants an introverted loner. I need to live my life for myself. And that life may not include another woman because my hobbies and passions are solitary in nature and don't include other people. And even if I like certain activities that include other people (like board games, some multiplayer video games, eating out at a restaurant/bar, karaoke, bowling, etc.) it's not like I am craving those things. I may crave love or sometimes even just sex (it's more of a mental craving than a physical one because I have low testosterone and my condition hasn't improved yet I don't think) but if there is a lot of time and money investment with no guarantee of a payoff in order to get those things, then I'm not going to invest the time. It feels like a waste of my time and money. If I want to have sex, I can call up an escort. And I have in the past. I have seen 7 escorts for a combined 12 sessions from May 2012 to January 2013. I haven't visited one in over 3 months because I'm receiving testosterone therapy (not only does low testosterone make it difficult for me to perform when necessary but it doesn't give me much of an energy reserve to get through a full-time work week and socialization).

It also doesn't help that my friends live far-ish. I met them from my support group, which is a 40 min drive from me and we hang out after the support group. I am debating whether I should drive 40 minutes to meet my friends in the city tonight and have a burger with fries and some drinks over the hockey game at 7pm and UFC at 10pm. I follow hockey and UFC but my attention span isn't the greatest for these activities. I don't know if it's worth it to invest all of that time to chat with friends over good food and good drink. I don't know. I have barely touched my video games as of late. I have been thinking about getting back into video games, anime, maybe watch some TV episodes as well (I have a big backlog). Maybe I'm just sick of socializing and need to go back to my nerdy and solitary hobbies for awhile. I'm also thinking about writing a novel. It's something I had planned for over 4 1/2 years but never got around to doing it. Writing a novel has no guarantee of a payoff either but I want to do it regardless of the outcome. If I do things as a means to an end (ie. going out to try to get p****), I lack the motivation to do it. If I do things as an end if of itself, then I'm motivated to do it.

Wolfheart wrote:
You aren't screwed, I am on the spectrum, I am getting my own business off the ground doing what I love and getting paid for it and although I haven't had long term relationships but that's more due to me lacking emotional maturity, I have had intimate sexual encounters with women and I have learned what I am truly passionate about.
Why would you be so hard on yourself so as to say that you lack emotional maturity? Have you seen how neurotypicals interact with each other?! lol. We just look at the world in a different way. We Aspies are here for a reason. We have ancestors who possess the Aspie genes that we now carry. Aspies had to reproduce in order to keep the Aspie race alive. Surely Aspies have been doing something right throughout history! Unless a whole bunch of people just suddenly mutated and became Aspies with no hereditary origin influencing us to be Aspies.

The reason why a lot of Aspies are destined to being lonely or even virginhood is because society today makes it so easy to unplug yourself from social life. People were less accepting of bachelorhood 50 years ago. "Confirmed bachelor". "Spinster" "Old Maid". So you either had to shape up (adapt) or ship out. For the first time in history, men and especially women can say "f**k marriage, children and even relationships" and just do away with those institutions. My superiors at work would probably get uneasy about asking me whether I have a girlfriend or not. They're probably wondering right now whether I'm a socially awkward nerd virgin (Even though a couple civilian women willingly opened their legs for me and I've seen a number of escorts, most people probably still think I'm a virgin based on how socially awkward I am) who isn't getting any or if I might be gay. They don't want to touch the gay topic with a 10 foot pole. Or else HR will come down on their ass.



Last edited by feenie on 27 Apr 2013, 10:51 am, edited 1 time in total.

Stargazer43
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Nov 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,604

27 Apr 2013, 10:51 am

You're 15, that means that if things aren't working out for you now you have all the time in the world to change. Having Aspergers doesn't mean that you will never be successful romantically, it just means that you may have to work that much harder at it than the average person.



MountainLaurel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jan 2011
Age: 71
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,030
Location: New England

27 Apr 2013, 1:50 pm

Quote:
WHY ISNT THERE ANY ASPIE GIRLS?! YOU GUYS ARE ALL DUDES AND IT MAKES MY SITUATION WORSE. THERE ISNT ONE ASPIE GIRL WHO LIVES NEAR ME!

I don't believe that there are no aspie girls who live near you. I know 3 aspie women in my workplace of approx 150 co-workers and my upstairs neighbor lady is aspie. I think that's a normal/random sampling of the general public.

You don't think any aspie girls are around you because you are not noticing them. They tend to be quiet/unobtrusive, but believe me they are present. No one is going to present aspie girls to you with literal labels on them. Start looking at the quiet girls at school.



1000Knives
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Jul 2011
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,036
Location: CT, USA

27 Apr 2013, 2:17 pm

Yeah, we're pretty much screwed. Oh well. Least I don't have any illegitimate children yet like a lotta guys my age.

Turn the frown upside down, you know?



billiscool
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Feb 2006
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,989

27 Apr 2013, 2:48 pm

yeah, it is tough for alot of aspie men out there, when comes to dating.
but your still young, you still have time.
don't rush yourself, 25 is when you need to start worrying.



appletheclown
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Apr 2013
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,378
Location: Soul Society

27 Apr 2013, 3:49 pm

Or you could lower your princess leia standards and go out with someone with a more counter-cultural group. Besides how are all the super hot ladies ever going to marry a handsome aspie man if all we do is whine and sit on our arse? You got the power! You got to know that given your age, becoming physically fit will be easier. Try and start an exercise regimine, for example I bike at least a mile a day, ladies love legs of steel! I may be 19, but I still have less time than you. Plus, for starters, your still a teenager, you haven't gained the maturity of the man you will become, or the defining character you are going to be. Please for now, be yourself, stay fit, and start to make the effort now to become skilled socially, it will help you a lot more than waiting like a lot of us did. Your young, stay cool, be respectful, and love ladies for who they are as a whole and not just looks and you will be quite alright.


_________________
comedic burp


The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 32,891
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.

27 Apr 2013, 3:55 pm

ARRRGHHH....FRESSH MEAAAATT

Image



appletheclown
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Apr 2013
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,378
Location: Soul Society

27 Apr 2013, 4:07 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
ARRRGHHH....FRESSH MEAAAATT

Image



Ohh noo it is a zombie woman! They have been starved of attention from good looking men like us, and we are still virgins, ruuunnnn!! !! ! (grabs condoms)


_________________
comedic burp