Best ways to date as an Aspie?
I've actually only had one boyfriend for just a few months and I'm 20.
My social skills are less than terrific, in fact I suck at socializing. I suck at even the slightest small talk. I've considered dating an Aspie, but after surfing through a dating site for an hour I didn't really even see anyone in my area on these sites. I wouldn't mind dating an open-minded NT. Although, from experience, I don't think dating a NT is easy because they just don't understand some of my tenancies or needs in a relationship.
I used to always be the girl who could easily survive without someone by her side...but it's becoming increasingly difficult to be alone. Any feedback is appreciated.
I'm in the same boat as you. I never had a relationship with anyone and my social skills suck too.
I'm not sure what advice to give but try to keep your head up, dating sites can be overwhelming and i've tried them too. I mostly got no responses from anyone and from the ones that did respond, they never stuck around and basically weren't worth it.
It might work in your favour being a lady - NT men are often (disclaimer: not "always") more direct and blunt than the NT ladies are (I'm not sure if "honest" is the right word to use though...)
We aspies NEED that simple, direct, straightforward and honest communication - not hints, innuendo, head-games and manipulation.
A lot of NT folks are on the opposite end of that measuring stick though, and thrive on socializing and drama.
...start by finding someone a little more introverted and has a lower social need than the "cool kids" do.
(And hey, if it comes down to it, the male Aspie population is huge in comparison to the ladies - you have your pick of the litter around here!)
for me...
Making friends with nt women: is easy, but does have it challenge at times.
but getting an nt women to become a girlfriend is something that I think is nearly impossible for me, but it could happen,
if every thing just lines up perfectly. but are odds are against me getting a nt girlfriend.
and to answer your question: yes aspie can date nt people, alot of them do.
unless your an eccentric and special type autism like me than no, it's can't happen.
get stuck with only female friends, which is cool with me.
silver medal is awesome, but at times a gold medal would be nice.
starrynightmare
Blue Jay
Joined: 12 Mar 2013
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 98
Location: Orlando, FL, USA
I'm currently in the longest relationship I've ever been in (almost 10 months) with an NT guy. He is definitely more introverted and we have a lot of the same nerdy interests. However, I did need to be more forward than I usually am to get him to admit his feelings for me when we first started hanging out. I think this is because he is shy even though he's NT.
When we first met, our "small talk" was definitely more about our similar interests (he noticed the Star Wars poster on my wall, etc.). I think your best bet is to be open to possibility and hopefully you'll find someone who values you for you.
We aspies NEED that simple, direct, straightforward and honest communication - not hints, innuendo, head-games and manipulation.
A lot of NT folks are on the opposite end of that measuring stick though, and thrive on socializing and drama.
...start by finding someone a little more introverted and has a lower social need than the "cool kids" do.
(And hey, if it comes down to it, the male Aspie population is huge in comparison to the ladies - you have your pick of the litter around here!)
I like your profiles pictures better when you show your face.
I know you say the same thing to me, but I don't care.
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